Instant Mental Breakdown
JUST ADD WATER!!!
So here I am. it's 12:52am. I realize shit shouldnt bother you so bad after time... but ya know.. its still does. 7 years and about 20 minutes ago, my mom passed away.
I'm a little drunk right now and thats all I can think about. Im trying to keep my shit together. It just kinda hit me out of nowhere. I glanced over at the clock and realized what time ie was earlier. 12:34.. the exact time my mom passed away. And it all kinda went to shit from there.
Why should i feel like crying so bad, over something I have had 7 years to come to terms with. This fucking sucks. Is every holiday for the rest of my fucking life going to feel like they are missing something. And of course with that being said, this is the first Christmas for Sally, which is also the very first Christmas since my father past away, so I am kinda fallin apart here.
Sometimes I really start to think about things. I think the term Permanent is over used. Or atleast its unproperly defined. All things are temporary. Forever is used for alot of things, but what is really forever. Is it our life span? Ot is it a theory of how long one thing should or could exist beyond a normal expectancy. I really done know. And I really dont even know what I'm talking about anymore.
Lizz went to her mom's hosue to apologize for a spat they had this week. Im glad they are getting along again because her parents are my family. I love them to death and I can't stand seeing everyone I love fighting. Well I need to stop typing and stop crying and wait for lizz to get home. Lots of love to all. Good bye.
So here I am. it's 12:52am. I realize shit shouldnt bother you so bad after time... but ya know.. its still does. 7 years and about 20 minutes ago, my mom passed away.
I'm a little drunk right now and thats all I can think about. Im trying to keep my shit together. It just kinda hit me out of nowhere. I glanced over at the clock and realized what time ie was earlier. 12:34.. the exact time my mom passed away. And it all kinda went to shit from there.
Why should i feel like crying so bad, over something I have had 7 years to come to terms with. This fucking sucks. Is every holiday for the rest of my fucking life going to feel like they are missing something. And of course with that being said, this is the first Christmas for Sally, which is also the very first Christmas since my father past away, so I am kinda fallin apart here.
Sometimes I really start to think about things. I think the term Permanent is over used. Or atleast its unproperly defined. All things are temporary. Forever is used for alot of things, but what is really forever. Is it our life span? Ot is it a theory of how long one thing should or could exist beyond a normal expectancy. I really done know. And I really dont even know what I'm talking about anymore.
Lizz went to her mom's hosue to apologize for a spat they had this week. Im glad they are getting along again because her parents are my family. I love them to death and I can't stand seeing everyone I love fighting. Well I need to stop typing and stop crying and wait for lizz to get home. Lots of love to all. Good bye.