I feel as though my delusions of grandeur are collapsing.

[futurebird]

Sometimes people confuse me. That’s not quite right: the people don’t confuse me; it’s their actions that confuse me. For example RV camping. My aunt is mad about it. She has this big bus-house thing and goes off to the state park for vacation every summer. They cook and fish and watch movies (yes there is a TV in the house-bus) This is called "a

Comments

[daiwainscott]

I don't think you have a problem. You sound very well grounded and passionate about many subjects, just don't be too demanding on yourself. You have a talent and you are important. Your life impacts your students, friends, family and us LJers too.

[arcanefruition]

Your problem is that you want to have an Important Life, and that's not possible for everyone, even if they're immensely motivated and talented, as you are. And you're also not sure how you want your life to be important, because everything seems so important to you.

I have a similar problem, except I can't paint.

Pretty much all you can do is keep creating as much as possible. That's Good Stuff, creating.

[m3rkvry]

People relax in very different ways. Some people can't dream of spending their downtime doing anything meaningful, just as you can't dream of spending your downtime doing anything meaningless. There is a reason why amusement parks and stupid movies and tropical beaches are so popular - those who experience them learn little or nothing, but those experiences help those people to decompress from the struggles of everyday life.

Feeling broken because you can't commiserate would be like feeling you're somehow "wrong" because you don't like rap music. It's a matter of taste. Pursue your happiness, and don't worry too much about why it makes you happy.

[dangerzooey]

Don't expect to be important. Continue to want to be important, and try to be important, and know that you can be important (because you can!), but don't expect to be important. Expecting to be happy is far more healthy, more realistic, and more enjoyable.

It is unrealistic to think you could be good at everything, but it's not unrealistic to think you could be good at anything you chose. We have a limited amount of time, and so can only develop some few talents. I'm quite confident you'd succeed at any of them. You are a very spectacular woman. So just make sure you pick the ones that are right for you. And don't feel guilty if they're not also the ones that are best for the world. Being important is not as important as being happy. We're just lucky at being the rare kind of people who is happy helping humanity, creating beautiful things, and progressing knowledge.

To The Girl

[volapuk]

You are a BEAUTIFUL, wonderful, well imaged person. You want purpose, order, direction, you feel, lost. You might be the type of person who wants, justices, rights, wrongs, good, and evil. That everything has, a place, and everything gets to it. A feeling of belonging. The feeling of love. You believe in a JUST world