Fanfic. In Excelsis. pt iv.

[sypherus_xiii]

Title: In Excelsis. iv.
Authors: sypherus_xiii and gambino
Pairing: HakyeonxTaekwoon, implied HakyeonxWonshik
Rating: NC-17. (For violence and implicit sex, although this chapter does not have anything too graphic for the faint of heart.)
Summary: In which Hakyeon takes Taekwoon under his wing and starts to question boundaries. 11,200+ words.

Disclaimer: This fiction was created for our own personal perverse desires in which we decided to share it with the rest of the world. It can also be more appropriately dubbed Murder Boyfriends. You've been warned.



part i. || part ii. || part iii.

a/n: As requested, I will add bold warnings to signal when you should skip a part for having a weak stomach. This chapter does not contain anything too graphic, though, so enjoy!

Taekwoon has never really entertained before. Not of his own will or desire, at least, and there's a small bit of awkwardness when Hakyeon first arrives because he's been here before, but under the strangest of circumstances. Taekwoon isn't sure if he should show him around like it hadn't happened or skip that step. In the end, he chooses to skip it, showing Hakyeon only to the kitchen where he offers him a seat at his counter and then a glass of wine (which he skips out on himself; still not over the trauma of too much wine at the Christmas party.)

He's chosen a simple enough dish to prepare: japchae. It's one of his favorites and something he's confident in serving to the restaurant critic. He tells Hakyeon that's what he's planned on making as he starts to slice vegetables and thinks to add that if Hakyeon doesn't like it, he could make something else.

The past few days had been so strange for him. He's never felt so separated from the rest of the world, like he's living behind a glass, looking in at everyone else. He wonders if this is how Hakyeon feels, like a guest to the rest of the population. There were moments while in the office where he'd felt on edge, felt like someone could just look at him and know. Not like anyone would--this was their special secret.

Taekwoon had worried that it might haunt him in his sleep and it'd disturb him to an unbearable point. The first part of that came true. He dreamed about Kwon Jiyong's apartment, about the sounds he'd made, about the pool of blood on the floor but when he’d wake up, it wasn't horror in the middle of the night--it's morning and he was well-rested. Because in between all of that horrifying imagery were the flashes of what was important: Hakyeon's smiling face. Hakyeon's glowing praise. That's all that matters to him.

He'd never really been praised in his life. If he brought home an A, it was an accusation that he could have gotten an A+. If he won the game for his team, he was questioned on why he'd messed up in the first half. But Hakyeon so easily saw something in him and thinks that he's worth something.

The sound of his cat’s bell-collar snaps him back to the present and out of his thoughts. When he turns back to look over his shoulder, he sees her up on the counter in front of Hakyeon, looking at the man as if to say 'Why aren't you petting me yet?' It makes Taekwoon smile. "She likes you." He tells Hakyeon quietly before shyly returning back to his cooking.

"Oh, you're a girl? Are you the main girl in Taekwoon's life?" His hand lifts, watching her lift her nose to sniff his hand before she pushes the soft crown of her head against his palm as he gently begins to pet her. "Uwa, you're cute. No wonder he doesn't date anyone." He whispers this part, but loud enough for the cooking male to hear, his gaze glancing to the other gliding around the kitchen.

The dark red of the wine in the clear glass is a welcomed starter, actually needing the nice break from work. Even though Hakyeon faked his journalism degree and aced his interview into the company, it didn't mean he was exempt from the usual workplace exhaustion, having his own deadlines to complete. Plus all of what he did outside of the office… this is why he requested Taekwoon make him dinner instead of going out for it, lacking the energy to maintain a front in public.

It was most certainly nice to know he doesn't have to hold up his mask in front of Taekwoon. If he's tired once he leaves the office doors, he can slump his shoulders and lean against the other without a second qualm. If he's annoyed, the other doesn't judge him for the twist of features and the slight whine that edges into his voice. It's nice to have this.

The cat paws forward to now investigate his wine and he chuckles. "Mm, careful now. If you drink too much of this stuff, you'll get even cuter, just like your owner." Once again he does the same thing--whispering loudly with another glance.

The first whisper has Taekwoon pausing for a moment to stare down into the pan of gently cooking vegetables. It's true he greatly prefers the company of his cat to probably any other human being on the planet but sometimes, there are exceptions to the rule. Sometimes he wonders if Hakyeon says things just to see how far he can get under his skin.

The second time Hakyeon whispers, Taekwoon decides it's fine to take a small pause in his cooking to turn around and actually fully look at the other man. "Why are you talking about things like that?" Because he can't remember anything cute about that night.

Then again, he can't remember a lot about that night.

Taekwoon gives a mildly annoyed sigh as he watches Hakyeon, studying him closely for a moment. "You're tired." He says plainly. It's easy enough to pick up on. Which isn't to say he doesn't look as beautiful as he ever does, there's just something off. "Have you been up late working?" Which work he means, he doesn't specify.

A chuckle puffs out from the other's obvious distaste at his choice of conversation with the cat, and as he slides his glass away from the whiskered gal, he sips at it idly when the other brings up his current state. "Mm," he first hums out while he lets the wine pool in his mouth before slowly swallowing it, the bitter sweetness of it refreshing in a warm way.

Since there's no point in keeping it to surface level work things (he does that enough with Wonshik), he starts off with the facts. "I found someone. An interesting character…" Swirling the red liquid gently about, he continues with his eyes still drawn to his glass, "…he kills." Setting the glass down on the countertop, the cat whisks away, and Hakyeon stares at Taekwoon to see his response.

He does his best to maintain outward control of his expression. A killer? It makes him curious. What kind of killer would Hakyeon want to get rid of? Remembering his cooking, Taekwoon turns away and returns to the stove. With his back to Hakyeon, he doesn't have to control his expression anymore and make sure he isn't giving away both his curiosity and concern. "Does he kill girls?" Is the first question he thinks to ask. After the first one, he isn't sure exactly who Hakyeon goes after: Criminals in general or those who hurt women. He grabs the pot of noodles and takes them to the sink to drain them.

"No, men. Do you wanna know how he kills them?" And he slowly slides off the stool, quietly circling around the counter and padding over to where Taekwoon's hovering over the pan. First his hand lifts to gently perch on his shoulder, sidling up right beside him to the point where his hip is brushing the other's. As he glimpses the stir fried vegetables, he shifts in to whisper, the light in his gaze if one were to look, of pure amusement (mostly for wondering how his quieter partner would react), "He sucks them off." The syllables roll of his tongue so precisely with such clarity that it could not be missed.

"He... what?" There's a lot of questions that go along with that but he doesn't know where to begin so he just states, "You can't kill someone with that..." His eyes stay set on the pan, even when his face crinkles in to the smallest look of confusion he can manage.

Leave it up to Taekwoon to take the fun out of something, but Hakyeon still doesn't lose his chance to further provoke Taekwoon. "Well he gives them the blow job, then kills them." So easy to say, his fingertips drifting down part of the other's broad shoulder to his back before it leaves him completely. "Then he takes their money." Spinning effortlessly to lean against the counter, hands gripping onto the edge, his expression shows his reproach to that last part. "I thought he was similar to me, trying to catch philandering husbands, but I would never take money. Killing people for your own financial wealth…"

There's an obvious chill that runs through him from the way Hakyeon touches him. If it were coming from him, how would it be to die that way? Taekwoon's lips form a small, O shape, silently saying that he understands this now. He thinks there's probably some kind of demon in some kind of ancient story that probably sucked men's souls out of their genitals but that's a story. Of course Hakyeon hadn't meant the man literally kills people that way. “It's sick." Taekwoon finishes the statement for Hakyeon as he moves to the cabinet that holds his plates, having to reach over Hakyeon to open it and pull two out.

When Taekwoon nears him, arms moving up to open a cabinet, he doesn't budge an inch. In fact he keeps his eyes level with the other's face, taking the few seconds to wander his gaze over him. For someone who talks so little, Taekwoon has a full set of lips and the dark strands of his hair show the attention he puts into his appearance. Most would suspect someone who doesn't bother to mingle with other people wouldn't spend the extra time in not just looking good.. but looking really good.

"Have you ever paid for that?" he abruptly inquires, because one of the greatest mysteries to Hakyeon is Taekwoon's sexual life. He wants to assume that Taekwoon has a sexual drive, but since socializing isn't his strongest quality, maybe he finds it through business, formal ways. "You know... paid for pleasure?"

As he lays the plates out carefully on the counter, Hakyeon's question almost makes him choke. Who just asks someone like that? He's amazed that even knowing what the other man does, he can still surprise him. "Do I seem like that sort of man?" He questions, tone even, trying to mask the offense he took to the question. He turns the heat off on the stove and gives the food a few more stirs around the pan before he starts to plate it. He doesn't look at Hakyeon as he speaks again. "I'd never do that." Not only is it wildly unsafe in a whole host of ways, it's just not something that interests him in the least. Of course, he's a man and he has urges, but it's not very often he feels them towards anyone in particular. He'd had enough of trying to force himself into things in life. Sex just isn't worth it to him.

This only makes it even more disconcerting because someone at Taekwoon's age doesn't seem fit to just: Not. Have. Sex. Then again, what about the other male was conventional? Pushing himself off the counter, he starts towards his neglected wine, sweeping it up smoothly for another small sip as he stations himself beside the table, standing. Already the silverware was placed at the small two-person table. "So… do you have a fuck buddy?" he asks again, because if there's anything about Hakyeon, it's that he's persistent. How else would he be able to follow a single person (occasionally a couple) and learn details about their life in order to erase their existence cleanly.

Taekwoon takes up both plates and brings them to the table, giving Hakyeon a rather pointed look. "No." He says flatly, setting each plate down on the table. This isn't exactly the topic of conversation he'd anticipated being on tonight. And it isn't exactly the most comfortable one to be on with Hakyeon of all people--his exception to the rule. He rethinks his decision to not have wine and returns to the kitchen to grab himself the bottle and a glass. "That kind of thing doesn't interest me." Empty, meaningless, sex. It's not that it'd be hard for him to find a willing partner. He's well aware that he isn't an ugly man and it's not entirely unheard of for someone to be attracted to him but he has to feel something. Otherwise, he does just fine on his own. Motioning for Hakyeon to take a seat at the table, he takes his own across from him, pouring himself some wine before refilling Hakyeon's glass.

Glancing down at the plates with the freshly cooked japchae, his mind distracts to the small thought of how cute this kind of is. It's been far too long since someone cooked for him. When the other returns he's surprised to see the bottle of wine and his own glass. He cracks a small smile, pulling the chair back and sitting down, "Are you trying to get me drunk?" He never told Taekwoon that the night of the their first dinner was another one of his faked molds, wondering if the other still believed he was weak to alcohol.

Taekwoon looks from Hakyeon to the wine bottle in his hand at that first question. When he looks back at the other after setting it down, it's with a rather flat, slightly annoyed glance. He doesn't even bother to dignify such a question with an answer. Of course he isn't trying to get Hakyeon drunk-- He's trying to be what he thinks a good host is. He hadn't actually thought about the other's low tolerance to alcohol.

"Have you ever cooked for anyone before?" Hakyeon’s voice sounds small asking this and he despises himself momentarily for it, coming off as curious and hopeful. It's just as he was staring at the noodles this annoying seed in his heart successfully bloomed into his vocal chords and made him speak. As he picks up the metal set of chopsticks, he swirls them into the glass noodles, inhaling the rich scent of flavor.

The second question has his expression shifting to something a little shyer. "I haven't." He says, looking down at his plate, pushing his food around a moment before he takes a bite, chewing it slowly to avoid having to speak anymore. It's such a big deal for him to feel comfortable with Hakyeon to the point where he can have the man sitting at his own kitchen table, eating food he himself had prepared.

The lift of his lips is hard to miss as he views the food again with an admiration, "Hn~," lifting some of the noodles with his chopsticks. There's certainly this feeling of accomplishment, that in a matter of a few weeks he and Taekwoon had crossed new bridges into each other's worlds. The last time Hakyeon felt the inclination to let one of his marks do this was... a while ago. Taking a bite of it, he slowly chews as he draws the ends of the noodles into his mouth, letting the hums of approval slip out. "Thanks," he says moments later after swallowing, staring down at the dish with its extra colors from the vegetables. "I usually eat out so... I barely know how to cook." Funny how he can inquire the other with a range of personal questions without a blink of the eye but it takes more effort to reveal a simple fact about himself.

Taekwoon looks at Hakyeon with obvious surprise when he tells him that. He thought a food critic would have to know how to cook to some extent and then, when he thinks about it further, he realizes that maybe the job is all a lie. That Hakyeon isn't really a good critic and it's just something to get by. "I had to learn how to cook." He thinks better about leaving that sentence there on its own and adds "--Living on my own, you know." He takes a long sip of wine, the taste of it bringing him back to the party for just a moment. Back when he had no idea how special he'd be to Hakyeon in only a few short hours.

"Your family..." Hakyeon starts, a topic he normally doesn't like to bring up but the sets of photos of him with no parents rouses his curiosity enough. "Do you keep in touch with them?" It was almost Christmas after all and he hadn't heard plans from the other about visiting home or the stress of buying gifts. He's focusing on eating the food, already determined to not waste a single noodle if this is the first time Taekwoon is showing off his skills.

Hakyeon asks him about his family and his insides go cold. There's this small part of him that wants to break the dam and set everything free. Finally just talk about it all but most of him decides to keep it locked up inside of himself where it's safe. It's not something he likes to leave his mind on. "I don't." Is all Taekwoon decides to say, his tone implying how little he wishes to continue talking about this subject.

There, he hit a wall. Taekwoon's short reply is enough for him to understand it’s a sensitive subject. Hakyeon wonders if he reveals a little about his own, if it'll coax the other to as well but the second he thinks about his mother--fragile, submissive, too afraid--and his father--merciless, violent, manipulative--he gulps down the words back into his gut.

"After we eat I'll tell you about the next plan," he changes the conversation himself, reaching for the wine to help wash down the images threatening to cloud his mind. Sipping at it, eyes falling closed to concentrate on the bitterness, he suddenly sees a woman on the floor screaming as a man's hand raises and--"Oh!"

Hakyeon feels the wetness soaking through his shirt and the weight of the glass dropping on his lap. Snapping his eyes open he peers down and sees the red blotch of wine, marring his shirt down to his black slacks, like a river of blood... "Oh no, I'm sorry!" Clicking into action, he picks the glass up from the dip between his thighs and sets it upright on the table, unsure if he should stand in case it causes more of the wine to splatter onto the floor.

Taekwoon is fine with continuing to eat in silence for the moment. Thinking about his family is such a draining task. His eyes drift over to the living room for a moment, watching his cat as she sprawls herself out across the visible arm rest of the couch. It's so true what people say; pets can be an incredibly calming thing.

Distracted this way, he doesn't even see Hakyeon spill the wine. He looks at him when he hears the other's voice, surprised, and it takes him a slight moment to register this. "Ah--" He moves to his feet quickly, going back to the kitchen to retrieve paper towels from a roll and he brings them to Hakyeon, passing them over so he can clean himself up a bit.

"It's going to stain." He says, taking a moment to consider their options. "Let me wash it, you can borrow one of my shirts."

Still he barely processes what he's done, his thoughts remaining slightly numb and distant but he just nods while hastily wiping at himself wherever he can with the towels. Sliding off the chair when he's sure nothing will drip, he kneels down to wipe at the floor, apologizing again because Hakyeon isn't clumsy. He doesn't inexplicably spill wine. "I got it but you might wanna use some water or something so it's not sticky," he looks up from his position on the floor, the paper towels tainted red and damp. Slowly standing, he doesn't bring his eyes to Taekwoon because right now he's swimming in confusion and doesn't want the other to catch too much of the way he's been thrown off his rail.

"I will..." His tone is gentle but does nothing to mask his confusion. He's never seen Hakyeon like this. Hesitant. It's strange to watch the other man without his typical overwhelming confidence. "It's okay. I'm not mad." He thinks to say, reassuring him before he's motioning for the other to follow him.

When he leads the way to his room, he stays silent. There's a moment’s hesitation before he remembers Hakyeon's been in there before. There's no reason not to let him inside now. He pushes the door open and steps inside first, moving to his closet. There's something so honest about this moment. There's no sense of anything fake coming from Hakyeon and it's beautiful, but concerning. There's no reason for something like spilling wine to make him so hesitant.

He grabs a plain button-up shirt and hands it over to Hakyeon when he joins him in the center of the room. "Just bring yours out with you and I'll soak it in the sink." he tells him before turning to leave.

Following the other with an unusual silence, the nightscape captures his attention from beyond the glass of the window and he welcomes the distraction. Although he's a messy mix of emotion right now from frustration to a humbling shock to this sudden need to erase lingering memories, he blinks over to watch Taekwoon who's right in front of him. "Ah, thanks," he studies the shirt although there's not much to consider.

Just barely glancing at the other's leaving figure, he tosses the shirt on the bed while he reaches down, focusing harder than he needs to while undoing each button. He can smell the slight distilled vinegar scent of the wine, breathing in slowly and breathing out heavily. Even his undershirt beneath is stained and as he pulls his arms free, he then peels the thinner layer off and throws it on the floor. Feeling his skin, he frowns but shrugs since at least it's not wet, the material of his shirts protecting him mostly.

Then he leans forward to take the new shirt and Hakyeon holds it up in front of him, already knowing this was going to be a size bigger on him. As he smoothly slides into it, tugging on the seams to let it rest properly on his shoulders, he hastily works to button them up so he's not keeping Taekwoon waiting. Leaning down to pick up his shirts, he turns towards the door, still staring down while he does up the remaining buttons at the bottom, the small expanse of his abdomen covered up soon enough.

Pausing outside the door, Taekwoon knows that he shouldn't but a part of him can't resist. He turns around, peering through the crack left in the door. The city lights that flood through the wide window make Hakyeon's figure glow in the center of the room. He watches as he works open the buttons on his own shirt. As he pulls it off and lets the undershirt follow. Hakyeon's skin is dark, beautiful. His lithe body incredible. Taekwoon feels his stomach flip in a way it usually doesn't. His hands clench into tight fists at his side.

He's never wanted someone this badly.

As soon as it's there, it's gone, and Taekwoon finds himself wishing he could stand there and watch Hakyeon forever but the final buttons are being fastened into place and he leaves before he gets caught.

Just as expected, the shirt hangs on him a little loosely, the hem untucked, and he leaves the bedroom. "Taekwoon?" he calls out, shirts crumpled in his hand.

Back in the kitchen, Taekwoon finds a large bowl and fills it with warm water and a bit of dish soap, just in time to hear the other call his name. "In the kitchen," he calls back.

Heading back out to the kitchen, he sees Taekwoon by the sink and now that he's let himself string out those thoughts that were plaguing him, he's able to send the other a soft smile as he comes up beside him and hands the garments over. "Thanks, again. If you don't mind I'll wear this home and return it to you... Monday?" The weekdays were always back to the grind of fake appearances and he knows if he returns with the other's shirt, it'll definitely attract extra glances. "Maybe after work?" he adds after that consideration.

Seeing Hakyeon come in to the kitchen wearing his shirt makes his stomach flip all over again. It's big on him, but it looks perfect. He returns the smile with the smallest one of his own, wanting to make Hakyeon feel more at ease about his mistake. "That's fine." He tells him as he takes the shirts from him. Turning to the sink, he runs them under water first, getting out what he can and then it hits him-- "Ah, you're not leaving already, are you?" He asks, looking over his shoulder back to Hakyeon.

Just as he is about to relax against the counter, Taekwoon's directing that question at him which in turn makes him jump a little, because he wasn't intending to leave. However... a very intuitive part of his sixth senses believes that Taekwoon doesn't want him to leave so soon. Since he always likes to take full advantage of these 'embarrass-Taewoon' opportunities, he leans against the counter but lets his rear glide along the rounded edge until he's right there.

Draping his neck sideways so he can meet the other's eyes, if he chooses to glance his way, Hakyeon asks in an undeniably amused voice, "Would you be sad if I left so soon?" Since he's left the first two buttons undone on the shirt, if one were to peek, they'd see the stretch of golden-toned skin that dips between the center of two collarbones.

The question and the way Hakyeon asks it makes Taekwoon bristle. He probably shouldn't have sounded so earnest when he asked. Since he knows Hakyeon already can sense the answer, he doesn't bother giving him one. Instead, he just turns his head to give him a vaguely reproachful look--he's instantly distracted by the small show of skin. He thinks about the rest of it that he saw when he absolutely shouldn't have. Thinks about how perfect it looks and how he wants to run his tongue along--

He cuts his own thoughts off and looks back down at the shirts in his hands. It's obvious something has him flustered but he does try his best to hide it. When he drops the shirts in the bowl to soak (having already gotten the color from a deep red to something much more pastel just by running it under the hot water quickly enough) he finally thinks of an answer for Hakyeon's question. "You said you were going to tell me about the next assignment after we ate." Though their plates are still sitting only half-eaten at the table, he wonders if Hakyeon wants to go back and finish. He likes to think about this as assignments. A job. And in a way it really is. Cleaning up the trash of the city... Hakyeon's really a public service worker.

"Mm, I am." Seeing Taekwoon has worked most of the stains out, the water a colored rouge, he waits for the other to finish up and hang out his shirts to dry before he trails back to the table where he doesn't want to let the food go to waste. It doesn't take long since this time he's thinking only about getting the noodles to his mouth, that it's only a matter of a few minutes before he's staring at an empty plate. Licking at his lips and showing a thumbs up, he compliments the meal and tells him he'll make sure to write a good review.

After settling onto the couch, the dishes cleaned right away since Taekeoon was just that kind of person, Hakyeon reaches into the bag he brought with him for his tablet. The electronic device lights up and there's a picture, a male with sharp sallow looks that border on pretty, the eyes wide and the chin sharp. He goes on to explain this Jang Hyunseung works odd jobs to earn a little bit of money, but although one would suspect he’d save it for a family or necessities of life, in actuality he uses most of it to hire out a sex worker for himself. "Her name is Hyuna but I checked her out. She's mostly innocent other than the pack of gum she'll occasionally sneak out. So... I figured he pays for the company. For the attention and basic human need we all want--a person to care about us." As he says this last part he drifts off, telling himself it's because he wants to let Taekwoon absorb and process all of this information, not for other reasons.

The man on the screen just had the look of someone who wasn't altogether there. Maybe he just understands that look well. The second picture, the one of him and the girl, makes Taekwoon feel a little sad. She's pretty--far too pretty to be selling her body to men like Jang Hyunseung. The thought of that man killing someone just for the money to rent women doesn't sit well with Taekwoon at all. He nods his head, shows that he's following along with everything that Hakyeon's been telling him. It's easy to decide that this is certainly is someone worth eliminating.

"What do you need me to do?" He knows what they did the last time. All the steps and precautions that it took to make things run the way they were supposed to but there's always variables. There must be. Things that will change with each new assignment they pick up. He wants to do everything perfectly for Hakyeon. He doesn't want to end up being seen as a liability, or someone who's useless. That's the last thing Taekwoon wants to be to Hakyeon. It scares him, just a little, how ready and willing he is to do anything for the other man already.

Now this.... is the part that's going to be fun to explain. Setting the tablet aside onto the table, he begins with precaution because as of their conversation earlier today, Taekwoon doesn't sound willing to toy with these kinds of things. "Hyunseung... has a type he seeks out. And I'm not that type." A pause bridges between the following words. "So you'll have to be one of his clients." This is when Hakyeon puts on the smile, sweet and warm as he tilts his head to create a more animal-like approach of cuteness (at least he wants this to be but is sure he's looking as fake as his smile). His hand even reaches out to pat at the other's thigh above his knee, squeezing afterwards for the extra surge of encouragement.

"One of his..." Taekwoon's voice trails off, trying to completely focus himself on the words that Hakyeon had just said. Trying to organize them in his head in a way that makes some sort of sense to him. He can't honestly believe that Hakyeon is asking this of him. "I don't have to let him do anything, right?" Is the first question he thinks to ask because that's the only thing that makes him hesitate. He just doesn't want the man to actually touch him.

"Ohh~~ of course not. I'll stop him before he does," Hakyeon gives another assuring pat before he slides his hand away to pick up his tablet again, because to him it's settled. Then again he doesn't let Taekwoon know that 'do anything' to him means actual use of the man’s mouth. "So, let's see... what night is good..." It's Friday now, but Christmas was on Thursday... He'd rather do this before Christmas and live through the holiday in peace without another target running through his mind. "Mm, tomorrow? Saturday's the best time since it'll be busier on the streets, more distractions for the police and I know Hyunseung will be looking."

Feeling reassured that at least it wouldn't go too far, Taekwoon nods his head. It's not hard to agree with something that would help Hakyeon, even if the thought makes him vaguely disgusted. "That's soon." He comments, but Hakyeon has probably already been planning this, so for him it probably isn't. "I have to run errands during the day--What time were you planning on?" He thinks about how he's even going to do this. He's going to have to act well.

"Late. Midnight. That's primetime for these occasions." Taking his tablet again, he pulls up a map of Hongdae, the Dunkin Donuts by the Cafe Bene showing beneath the tip of his pen. "Let's meet here at 11:30." Since this will be a job done in public, not in the privacy of a home or apartment, they'll need to meet on the street for the best escape. He does have it planned down to the very tee, knowing on these nights there are less police around because they'd rather not deal with the drunken, loud college students and the overflowing club crowds.

It still feels just a little bit strange to talk about this like it's typical business. Taekwoon can't say he's ever imagined elaborately plotting the extermination of people before but he wouldn't have pictured it to be quite like this. So... exact and casual. Like they were discussing article deadlines or what sort of font to use in the final layout of the magazine. It honestly feels a lot like talking about work only he actually feels worthwhile doing this.

"He'll be easy to spot," for he had the ash-grey hair, "and we'll follow him. When we see him head into one of the smaller alleyways, that's when you'll go ahead. If you just stand on a corner and look like you want something, he'll come to you..." Hakyeon stops there as he looks over Taekwoon again.

Of course it'd be in an alleyway, because this has to get more and more uncomfortable. It's like a situation in a terrible direct-to-dvd film. He'll have to play the part of the lonely business man, seeking out the warmth and comfort of another man's body on a dark saturday night. Taekwoon tries not to show how disgusted the thought makes him.

"Hmm.. You can wear clothes like this, but if you're going to wear a collared shirt, you need to do it like me, some of them undone." Without asking for permission, setting his tablet on his lap, he starts fussing with Taekwoon's appearance, fingers going to his hair first where he messes it up a little.

"You can't look so clean-cut. You have to look like you're ready. Ready right now." And then his hands are dropping down to the other's shirt, following the line of his folded collar before reaching the top button, freeing it then moving on to the next. "There... no, wait." He undoes one more, then nods feeling quite satisfied. "That's sexier." Retreating his hands, his eyes move up and down over the other's figure sitting beside him, critically thinking of how else he can advise him.

When Hakyeon is moving in closer and his fingers are in his hair, he's not thinking about being grossed out by the thought of propositioning a murderer for sex in an alleyway. He's thinking about how nice it feels to just be touched in some way by Hakyeon. He feels his heart beat out of rhythm when those delicate fingers are moving over the lines of his shirt, working open the buttons. A small part of him wishes he'd keep going.

But he pulls back and Taekwoon's left to look down at himself, at the way his shirt now mirrors the one Hakyeon's wearing and he gives him one of those famous Taekwoon-is-annoyed looks. "I look like an idiot." He comments, fingers running over the open line of button holes on one side of his shirt. "Is this really ‘ready-to-go’?"

Now he reevaluates it, trying to recall what kind of men Hyunseung really did go for. Then again they were the uptight ones who looked like they desperately needed relief. "Oh..." blinking like it was just a mistake, he reaches back in and starts to redo the other's buttons, snorting to himself. "You're right, this is better for him. I guess I prefer a little show of skin." Shrugging as he gently lets his fingers stroke the top button after it's been refastened, his eyes flicker upwards to the other's as his hand is lowering. There's this small candle-like warmth beginning to spread in the apples of his cheeks.

Forcing himself to talk to rid himself of that sensation, he realizes too late that he was holding his breath as well, "Ah, just act yourself tomorrow. You're attractive enough where he'll come to you. Just... be careful, too." Hakyeon adds in the end. "Usually he waits until after the blowjob, I dunno why..." his nose pulls at that idea since Hyunseung could easily make the kill when the guy's pants are first down, "but you never know. Situations aren't always set. I'll be right there, though." And because he just can't resist, his hand is lifting to graze the pad of his thumb over Taekwoon's cheek, the back of his knuckles pressing lightly against his jaw.

It isn't that he doesn't like when Hakyeon touches him in any way, it's that it makes him feel too many things and all at once. Things he'd kept locked down and hidden away for so long. It's as if Hakyeon had pulled some kind of cork out of him and he's a bottle that's been filled with pressure for too long. The affectionate touch that Hakyeon gives him after talking about everything they had is such an odd juxtaposition and he wonders if there's anyone else in the world who's ever had to feel this confused all at once. His eyes close for a few moments longer than a normal blink and he breathes in deep through his nose. A part of him is scared, worried that something may happen and Hakyeon won't be able to save him in time. When he opens his eyes again, it's with a soft voice that he says to Hakyeon, "Promise me you'll be right there." Quiet. As if he's embarrassed to admit in this way that he's scared.

Unable to detect where the seed of his sudden affection is rooted, he hesitates. Not because he doubts his ability to save Taekwoon, but due to the brooding feeling that there's more to this. And like he always does when there's a situation approaching that he thinks threatens to be out of his control, he escapes. "I don't make promises but I'll be there," the words can be seen as harsh, but it's reality. And Hakyeon's pulling himself away altogether, grabbing onto his tablet, setting it safely back into his bag and standing up at once.

"But I should go now. I shared everything with you, but if you have any other questions you can just call me." Securing his bag over his shoulder, he's well aware of the wall he abruptly shoved between him and Taekwoon. Call it his own measures of defense, but right now he can't backtrack, he can't change it. There's this unknown concern? Worry? No... it's fear. It's fear that's threading through his system and he doesn't like it.

That answer seems about right in fitting with the Hakyeon that he's come to know like this. He ignores the sinking feeling in his stomach as he watches the other man ready himself to leave. "I understand," he starts, moving to his feet as well so he can show him out. "I won't need to ask anything." He keeps his distance from him in a way that could be obvious but (he hopes) isn't. It's when they reach the door that a question he'd off-and-on been wondering the answer to pops up. He looks down at the other man bent over to put his shoes back on. "Is Hakyeon your real name?"

As he's slipping into his shoes, thanking Taekwoon again for taking care of his shirt, he straightens up and just as his weight shifts towards the door, the other is posing that question. While he stares ahead at the door, several long seconds passing, slowly he turns to peer at the man beside him. "It's N. It was given to me when I took on this life. When I discovered my real self." The way he forms his words are clear and slow, like he's echoing this from the remote depths inside of him. "Have a good night Taekwoon," he intentionally says his name, a covert provocation, one meant to remind Taekwoon of his name that still connects him to his past, his present, his weaknesses, his reality of an office cubicle. "I'll see you tomorrow," the door gently swings open with the press of the button and he's showing one small smile before he's disappearing through the frame.

--

The night before Hakyeon rarely slept. Every time he closed his eyes he'd see white streaked with red, glass beneath his feet, and a lifeless body. He had these dreams every so often, each time the body appearing to him differently. Last night he saw it on the bed, eyes blank from death and the figure would look so, so peaceful if it weren't for their insides decorating the white sheets.

Despite the tired shadows weighing beneath his eyes, he's more than alert for this job though. This time Taekwoon is a crucial role and although he'll be stepping in when it’s appropriate (about to get inappropriate), he knows how essential it is to even lure Hyunseung in.

Standing there where they agreed, right in the midst of the young college crowd with couples who are just looking for a fun date night, he blinks as someone approaches him that isn't Taekwoon. It's a guy, asking him for directions but Hakyeon knows how this goes. The guy will end up asking him to take him to his destination personally where he'll declare that's where he and the guy will proceed to have their date. Sighing, as he's not in the mood to even play around, he tries pointing up the street that winds, hoping this guy could get the clue he wasn't budging from his spot.

Taekwoon had been nervous all day. Jumpy. At the bank, he'd been asked a simple question and very nearly snapped at the poor woman. The thought of what he had to do later on had kept him on edge. After a couple more relatively unpleasant (more so than usual) encounters Taekwoon decides he isn't getting anything done, not with this weighing heavy on his mind. He goes home and lets himself fall asleep.

It's not as hard to do as his nerves would make him think it'd be. He dreams about the beach. About the waves that crash onto the shoreline. About how they draw sand out but also deposit new sand in its place. And not just sand but beautiful, colorful, shells. Jellyfish bodies. The bones of an undetermined fish. Seaweed. He watches each of these things start to show up on the beach. He's mesmerized by the different shapes of everything and he feels like he wants to touch them, but sure enough, when he reaches out another wave just crashes against the sand and draws everything back out. Leaving the canvas blank and changeable all over again.

His cat licks at his hand and it stirs him out of his sleep. The first thing he notices when he's opened his eyes is just how dark his room is. He hadn't realized how much sleep he'd been missing lately. Pushing himself out of bed, he checks the time. 8PM. Plenty of time to get ready and get to the designated meeting spot. The first thing he does is feed the cat (the whole reason, he knows, behind being woken up is how badly she must have wanted to eat). A shower, brushing his teeth, styling his hair--and then he remembers what Hakyeon had said and he unstyles it.

Looking through his closet is daunting. He has no idea what looks 'sexy' on him. Taekwoon thinks he should have asked Hakyeon to pick out his clothes. In the end, he settles on a wide-necked, grey, long sleeve shirt and a pair of black jeans he'd forgotten he owned. He looks himself over in the mirror in the hallway as he's getting ready to leave, black jacket pulled over the whole thing. It's good enough.

Taekwoon makes it to the busy area with minimal time to spare. It isn't hard to spot Hakyeon in the crowd outside the Dunkin Donuts. The other man is taller than most and even if he weren't, Taekwoon thinks he'd probably always stand out to him. Which means that it isn't hard for him to see the other's expression, the distress he so obviously is feeling towards the man still talking to him and that's when Taekwoon approaches him. It's bold, incredibly bold, for Taekwoon, but he slips past a couple walking by and places an arm around Hakyeon's waist when he's at his side.

"Is there something wrong?" He asks, the question directed to Hakyeon but his gaze locked on the man. An attempt at intimidation.

Utterly, completely, wholeheartedly distracted by what amount of words it'd take to dispose of this guy, it's that opportune moment that allows a tall, lean figure to materialize out of the ever-moving sea of bodies. Hakyeon almost steps back to curse, thinking it was another guy trying to hook him in, but when the familiar quiet voice surfaces, arm claiming his waist, he... does a double-triple take. Maybe he's ogling because he knows for sure he's not blinking, lips gaping slightly as he inches his gaze down down down.

Hakyeon doesn't even see the guy fluster in panic and disappear. He's too stuck on this new image of Taekwoon, not ashamed by the open way he's staring because the other male deserves to be admired. "Wow," he finally greets, after he did a few rounds of staring between thighs in snug jeans and collarbones asking for the world to appreciate them (for him to appreciate them). "Were your errands buying new clothes?" He'd only ever seen Taekwoon in his black slacks and collared shirts. There was that one time he saw the shirt beneath his button-up but this was still so very, very different.

Taekwoon watches without moving his gaze as the man makes a quick exit. He doesn't move until he's disappeared out of his sight, lost in the crowd of bodies. It's then that Taekwoon takes his arm back, lets it fall useless to his side. It may have been overstepping some sort of boundary to touch Hakyeon like that but it worked well enough to get rid of the person who had so obviously been annoying Hakyeon.

"Hm?" He looks over to Hakyeon when the man speaks. "These are old clothes." Not super old, just ones that he's had, he means. Taekwoon looks down at himself and then back to Hakyeon, a slightly confused, slightly concerned look on his face. "Are they not right?"

Hakyeon should be grateful really that Taekwoon is so dense with certain aspects. If the other had caught on how seeing him in this attire sparked a different flame, he would've had to resort to his overtly indifferent mode of business. Instead he had some breathing room to tease the other. "No, they're good. Great, in fact. Hyunseung's probably sniffing you out right now," and he starts to laugh, because it's well worth it to see the expression darkening over Taekwoon's face.

"Come on, we need to move to a less crowded area." Walking through Hongdae on the Saturday night before Christmas to do a job is one of the worst ideas ever. Not only are couples swarming the streets with groups of friends, out to admire the decorations and do last-minute shopping, Hakyeon's also admiring the decorations and wishing he could shop. It's the lights hanging from the trees on the sidewalk and the shop windows with blinking Christmas trees that makes him halt every five seconds to marvel at it all. This is really why he asked to meet early though. He knew he'd need the extra time.

At one point he's clinging onto Taekwoon's arm when the cutest, chubbiest gingerbread men are lined up in the window of a pastry shop. But he sighs as he knows there's no time to actually revel in the festive treats. He should've asked to meet a half hour earlier.

It isn't hard to notice the way that Hakyeon looks around at the Christmas scenery with something close to wonder. For Taekwoon, the holidays have never meant much to him. He's never had a significant other to spend the holiday with--to appreciate these things with. As he walks with Hakyeon through the decorated street, he wonders if this is a little bit like what a Christmas date feels like. As he's lost in the thought, he feels Hakyeon grabbing his arm. It makes his eyes go a little wide in surprise, but they soften when he sees the way the other man's face lights up at the sight of the cookies in the window. He looks up at the shop's sign and stores the name of it in his memory. He'll have to come back here when he has the time.

By the time they reach the upper streets where the clubs are sparse and it's more of the restaurants and shops that have already closed, they start to slow their pace. Taekwoon hates it because now he feels like he can hear his own heart beat.

"Start walking ahead of me," Hakyeon advises, already drawing away to look at the menu of a restaurant that's standing outside.

Taekwoon does it without argument even though he can feel the nerves turning in his stomach. There's a very real chance that anything can happen. What if Hyunseung doesn't wait and just kills him? What if Hyunseung isn't interested in him at all? He reaches up and runs a hand through his hair, going to smooth it out before he remembers it doesn't matter. Ready to go.

Time passes. It's not instantaneous that it happens, but it rather drags on to the limit where Hakyeon has to double check his notes in his phone. Hyunseung usually strays along the streets a little after midnight but it's approaching one. That's when he hears a door creak open and slam shut, footsteps stumbling as a lean figure fights to stand up straight. An older man reeking of soju leaves the restaurant he's posted in front of, and the second he spots Hakyeon is when he knows this is just asking for trouble. The guy slides up next to him, bracing his weight on the wall as he can barely stand.

"Hey pretty. Looking for company?" He's balding at the hairline and Hakyeon cringes as his hand shoves out, maintaining distance between them.

"I'm already taken. Waiting for my girlfriend," Hakyeon mutters, hastily slipping away, shrugging off the hand that tries to grab at him. "Fuck," he curses quietly as he realizes then Taekwoon isn't up ahead like he once was. "Shit, shit," he curses again as he hastens his step, walking down the nearly empty street.

There he is. It makes Taekwoon’s heart stop for a moment to actually see Jang Hyunseung in person and not just in a picture. He's hanging out at the opening of an alleyway and he realizes he's been staring when Hyunseung's eyes meet his. The target holds Taekwoon's gaze for a few moments before he's turning away and disappearing down the alley. For a moment, Taekwoon thinks about leaving but the thought escapes him as quickly as it's there. Hakyeon needs him to do this.

Courage gathered, he makes his way to the alley and takes a few steps inside. "Are you looking for something?" Jang Hyunseung asks him.

Taekwoon responds by nodding his head and adding a quiet, "I've got money."

He can see Hyunseung smile through the dim light. "What are you waiting for? Come here."

There's a disgust that washes over him the closer he gets to Hyunseung. He doesn't want to be doing this at all and it must show when the man tells him, "Don't be nervous. No one will find out."

Hyunseung backs him up against a wall. He can feel the bricks through the material of his jacket. Hands are on his body, running down his chest, stomach, over the front of his pants and his stomach flips.

"You're not even hard. We can fix that."

Taekwoon looks to the opening of the alleyway, wonders how much further this has to go before Hakyeon is there to stop this. He just wants to--"Ah!" It shocks him when he feels Hyunseung opening his belt, tugging the zipper down on his jeans. He shuts his eyes tight as a bony hand works its way inside, past his underwear, wrapping around him and stroking him. He practically begs for Hakyeon to show up in his mind. Why wasn't he here yet?

The first alleyway Hakyeon pauses, peeking past the corner but he sees nothing except for a large dumpster and bags of trash surrounding it. Hurrying to the next one, keeping close to the wall, he doesn't see anything either but just as he's about to move on, he hears noises.

Dipping low, the width of the dumpster ahead blocking him from view, he can hear the voice carry over to him despite the low murmuring of it. The gasp that releases is undoubtedly Taekwoon and Hakyeon's measuring his steps so carefully as to not even step over a tiny piece of gravel. When he's nearing the dumpster, he presses himself against the wall. From there he can see through the crack, and what he sees renders him speechless (like he was actually talking).

It's only a fragmented glimpse, of Taekwoon flush against the wall and another figure pressing against him. He can easily make out a hand disappearing within the flaps of his black jeans and although he can't see anything above the shoulders, he's positive there's obvious discomfort written all over Taekwoon's features.

Edging his way around the dumpster now, remaining low to keep the attention away from him (he can't even let Taekwoon know he's there), he watches the backside of Hyunseung, this position leaving him blind to Taekwoon now. It's too soon since Hyunseung's still in a position to retaliate while standing. Once he's on his knees though, Hakyeon knows he can move in.

It's going to be an easy kill. None of the foreplay he loves, and not as much sweet talk he likes to give.

Suddenly unbearably warm, Taekwoon feels his blood start to rush through his body in an odd way. There's still a sense of fear in him keeping his body from betraying him entirely. He hears Hyunseung sigh and tell him to relax already but god it's hard to when he knows this man could kill him at any moment. He opens his eyes in time to see the man getting down on to his knees, hand still wrapped around him. His stomach turns in a terrible way when he watches the man lean forward and he feels warm breath against his flesh.

"Tell me what you want." Hyunseung asks him and Taekwoon feels like he wants to throw up. This isn't at all what he wants, anything but this. He looks up at the sky and, for a moment, he wonders if he's been completely abandoned.

So quick, so casual, his steps are in stride from the get-go, boots clicking firmly on the pavement. Hyunseung hears him too late though. His fingers are clenching into the side of the base of his neck, squeezing so hard with his thumb forcing itself into the nerves there that he can hear the strangled cry from Hyunseung as the pain must be surging through him. Just one thrust of his hand and he's sending the man onto the ground in a wave of shock and pain, knowing he'll be preoccupied with fighting the sudden reaction of his body to try and run away or pull out his knife.

Hakyeon wants to turn to Taekwoon in this moment and pull the other close and apologize and help him zip up, but he's running on this unexpected anger; or some form of emotion that's making the darker knots in him twist. For some reason it kicked in when he had taken in the full sight of the other two: Hyunseung slowly lowering to his knees while the stretch of Taekwoon's neck curved from staring upwards, and he saw nothing after that but the white flash of anger--or whatever feeling this was.

It takes a few moments for Taekwoon's mind to process what just happened. His chest swells when he looks to Hakyeon, seeing him standing over Hyunseung. He really did come for him. Taekwoon adjusts himself, zips up his pants, and pushes himself away from the wall entirely. He doesn't even have it in him to say anything about how late Hakyeon was, he's just so happy that he's there at all.

Hyunseung's on the ground, clutching at his shoulder for the source of the pressured burst of nerves he enacted. He knows how he's going to kill him but that hotness searing through his body makes him want to ensure these last moments of his life are full of nothing but regret and fear. Stepping beside him, Hakyeon's boot flattens onto a flap of his jacket, the side he knows Hyunseung stores his pocket knife. Slowly crouching down, head drifting more to one side as if to study the current state of the groaning figure, his hand unhurriedly slides along the inner lining of the coat until he feels the smooth handle. Slipping it out, he lifts the blade, so small but so lethal. "How many have died by this? How many have you killed?" he asks the blade itself for the man who's wielded it up to this point is unworthy.

There's a moment where Taekwoon wonders if he should ask Hakyeon what he should do, how he should help, but there's something different about Hakyeon right now; about the way that he stands, speaks, looks. It's all so much harsher, something animalistic about it all. This isn't the same control that he worked with the last time. He wants to reach out to him and calm him down but he doesn't want to interrupt this. Maybe it's all just a part of his plan.

The following pleads to sneak in last words of redemption and promises to not kill anyone again fall uselessly from those lips. Hakyeon blocks all of those words from his mind, and he's not fully aware of what occurs in these next moments. Everything locks into place and he feels his mouth moving in murmurs, senses his hands operating automatically as they slide on latex gloves and from that point, he doesn't quite remember.

Breathing hard, Hakyeon blinks, reality folding around him again. Consciousness flooding back, he glances down and sees the dark red, staining fabric, seeping onto the black pavement, and decorating the knife gripped tightly in his hand. Swallowing hard, he slowly stands, staggering one step backwards as he views the messy masterpiece he created. Not as clean as he wanted, but the job's clearly done.

It's hard for Taekwoon to watch, but impossible to look away. Hakyeon's lost control and it's obvious in the way that he attacks the man with a ferocity that he hadn't seen in him the last time. That he hadn't seen in anyone ever and that says so much. Is it always this different from target to target or is there just something about Hyunseung that set Hakyeon off like this? He'd been expecting something calm and perfectly calculated like the last time. This is more like a wolf attacking a deer.

Hyunseung's eyes are hollow as they stare up at the sky, at least appearing like he'd been attacked in the alleyway. It'll be another case where the police will slap it onto their stack of unexplained murders to investigate, a pile that grows larger every night. As Hakyeon hastily takes out his package of disinfectant wipes, he's cleaning the blade and handle, looking shinier than before and he tosses it on the ground next to the immobile form.

And finally.... as he's pulling his gloves off, does he peer over at Taekwoon. "Is it on me?" he questions quietly, referring to the blood. He doesn't bother looking down at himself, unable to see the small splatters of red on part of his shirt beneath his coat. The more alarming part of it all was probably the splashes of blood that managed to reach his face, and he's holding out his package of those wet cloths, asking Taekwoon to wipe any of it off him if he could.

When Hakyeon comes back to the present and turns to him, Taekwoon's eyes raise instantly at the blood splatter across his lovely cheeks. It doesn't disgust him, it just surprises him. He'd stayed so clean the last time. Taekwoon reaches for the wipes and takes them, bringing one first to the blood on his shirt and when the stain doesn't completely come out, he's using nimble fingers to do up the buttons. "Wear it like this." He tells him softly, pulling out another cloth. He brings it to Hakyeon's cheek, gentle as he wipes the blood away from him. "I was scared." He admits, the last few flecks of blood disappearing with another wipe of the cloth. He drops his hand, staring at Hakyeon with eyes that can't hide his feelings in this moment. "I got worried that you weren't coming."

Remaining still and silent as Taekwoon cleans him off, letting him pull his coat closed as well, it's when he conveys his feelings that makes Hakyeon's stomach churn and it's uncomfortable. He knows there's something looming over him, a reason why he had one of his rare 'blackout kills'. Those were always more dangerous, more careless, but this time he lucked out it could be a less deliberate death in this dangerous area.

"I told you I would." Hakyeon replies, holding back from viewing that gaze he knows is waiting for him, focusing on tucking the gloves into a plastic bag and tucking them away into his inner pocket. It's just that Taekwoon at times can be so open and real, and it's this single moment that he doesn't want to see it. The tone in his voice is enough for him to understand.

Disregarding his wish to just praise the other and start heading towards the main area and to the subway station, his shoes are digging into the hard ground with one step and his hands are suddenly cupping the other male's head. He's pressing his forehead against the other's, the fringe of his hair flattening as he slides his eyes shut, the coupling words of "thank you" filling the air between their noses, lips, and chins.

It only lasts a short frame of time, for he's already pulling away. "We should leave."

He knows Hakyeon said he would and he feels stupid for having ever doubted him. This is their bond now. He should always know that he's safe when Hakyeon says he will be. Hakyeon's hands are still warm from his gloves when they touch his own cold cheeks. The feeling of their foreheads touching, their warm breath mingling, and those words have his chest clenching in a way he doesn't think he's ever going to get used to. He reaches his hands up to grab for Hakyeon's but by the time he does, the other man is already pulling his back. Stepping back from him, Taekwoon sighs to try and let the feeling escape from his body. "Alright." He responds, voice a little rough from the heaviness of the feelings that course through him.

His eyes fall back to Hyunseung's body on the ground for only a few moments before he's closing them and turning away. When he opens his eyes, he's looking back out the end of the alleyway, where he'd hopelessly looked for Hakyeon earlier from his position pressed to the wall. He takes the initiative to lead the way out of the alley, wipes shoved into his pockets along with his hands for warmth. All he can think of is how it doesn't compare to the warmth Hakyeon's hands exuded.

Having grown accustomed to this process, of switching between the worlds of reality to the one of fabrication, it's easy for him to act like what happened minutes ago never actually took place. When the crowds start to thicken again, people moving about their lives without a thought spared towards the possibility of a person losing their undeserved life a couple of blocks away, he enters back into the contrived realm of Christmas cheer and holiday spirit.

His arm finds Taekwoon's again like before their task, looping around it. This time he's walking closer though, his hold tighter, his smiles more frequent but less genuine. There's street performers singing carols (Seoul never sleeps) and Hakyeon doesn't hesitate to drag Taekwoon to watch them, clapping along with the bob of his head, nudging the other to do the same. From there he continues to gape at store displays, draped lights, and a world that he knows he'll always be looking into from the outside.

Like a snowglobe he can shake up for his own brief entertainment, everything always settles back into its place where he's watching, admiring from outside the glass, sometimes wishing he could be inside. However, this is the life he chose, and as sparse as those moments come of him missing the normalities, he knows one day he'll shake up the globe so much that the glittering specks won't ever land dully back on the ground, but they'll remain fluttering about to conceive a world of dazzling wonder. A place worth living in.

Or maybe he just needs to create a world around himself like it. One that's a little less lonely, where the ghosts of his past stop haunting him, and he can stop living under false pretenses. A life where he doesn't need to run from nameless fears.

Hakyeon finds his gaze pulling towards the man beside him and wonders how long it'll take to create a life like that.

part v.

a/n: I hope you enjoy!!! Since it had been so long since we last updated, I thought I would reward you all with a longer update!