LJ Idol Season 11, Topic: "I Can't Get Calm!"
This time it was Arlene’s turn.
In this Place was a darkness that had never known the idea of full light. The smells swirling about were rank like a bakery of sorts where aromas took on a misguided life of their own. There was a steaminess, first warm, then cold, that spoke of the memories of life, both good and bad. Arlene took this all in with perplexity. Why did she have a bad feeling about this place? And just what was that peculiar smell?
At first, Arlene drifted somewhat aimlessly. Strange muted sounds accompanied her, just below her ability to discern what they were. She felt like herself, and yet, not. So odd.
She had that feeling of being caught in a dream without escape. She didn’t try to understand. But yet, …and yet…It felt like a huge question was billowing around her like a cloud of noxious gas.
Why did she have that overwhelming, yet familiar, feeling of doubt?
As Arlene flowed through the dark miasma, she suddenly was thrust up against an embodiment in a white coat. Well, not white, exactly, but a neon greenish glowing figure who somehow projected helpfulness.
“Well, dearie, I’m here to provide guidance to you,” soothed the Being.
“Oh, what a relief!” breathed Arlene. “Where am I?” She tried to look around but realized she didn’t have to turn her neck to perceive everything around her. Not that any of it made any sense, of course. And then there was that sound again. Was it a distant skittering of a nervous squirrel?
“Don’t you know?” the Being replied. “You’ve had an unfortunate event, dear.”
“Have I?”
“You have.” The Being understood that she would have to break the news to Arlene very gently.
“You’re suffering from Amnesia. It’s a common result of folks in your condition,” replied the neon green glow.
“Condition? I do feel shivery and cold.” Arlene felt the disquieting sense of dread grow a bit larger. The scrambling squirrel sound seemed to have gained a nervous voice.
“I’m very sorry, my dear. You have hit your head very hard."
“Are you saying I died?” Arlene was briefly startled. “Have I crossed the Rainbow Bridge?” A hundred questions bubbled up in her mind like the effervescence in her favorite fizzy drink. But, just as suddenly, she realized that, if she had died, she actually didn’t care that much about it.
“What was that?!” This time the pesky ‘squirrel’ found its voice. “That Arlene never did lose any weight…”
“Oh my! That sounds exactly like my friend Clarabelle!” Arlene declared. “Is she down here too? And why is she saying mean things about me? She always was skinnier than I was. How dare she?!”
Arlene tried to look around her to catch sight of her friend. Alas, it was far too dark to see any details.
A new voice seemingly nagged at Arlene. “Now that that lump of lard is gone, we’ll get to see just how messy her house is.”
“Oh, why that sounded just like Kenesha.” Arlene felt so humiliated. She reflected on the fact that Kenesha’s house always had been spotless. “She was usually so nice to me. Why the shade?”
The Being just tut-tutted. If Arlene had been paying attention, she would have been aware that the Being was slowly shaking her head.
Arlene did remember just then that the Being had expressed that she was here to give Arlene guidance.
“You know, when someone dies, it is common to wish them ‘Rest in Peace.’ I’m not finding this peaceful at all,” Arlene was surprised to realize she felt a big sore lump in her throat developing. “I also thought that people generally remind each other not to speak ill of the dead. I guess my friends are not doing very well at that.”
Arlene tried once more to scan the dark shadows. ”So, is Kenesha down here with Clarabelle?”
From behind her, Arlene then heard the silly tittering of her girlfriend Margaret and…was that BOB, her husband?!
“I KNEW it!” exclaimed Arlene. “They are having an affair! I’ve suspected as much for months! How can I rest in peace down here if I am to be tormented by my so-called friends?”
The Being seemed to cross her arms in front of her chest. “Now, dearie, it is apparent that you need to spend some time in transition. Let me guide you.” Arlene found herself being gently ushered further down the path. Arlene couldn’t help sniffling a bit as they moved along.
Softly, the Being finally began to speak. “Do you realize, dearie, that Clarabelle is not here?”
“No? Are you sure? I know I heard her.” Arlene whimpered. “What about Kenesha? I’d know her voice anywhere.”
Again, the Being gently said, “No, not Kenesha, either.”
“And Margaret, the strumpet! I’ll never forgive her for moving on my man.” Arlene was truly upset. “And Bob! What about those vows?”
“Arlene, dear,” the Being spoke again. “None of those people are here. In fact, those voices are all in your own head.”
“No.” Arlene shook her head back and forth.
“Yes.” If it could, the Being would have been moving its head up and down. She enveloped Arlene in a warm cozy feeling. Arlene felt her shivering abate. There even seemed to be a slight glow of brightness ahead.
“How could I bring those voices with me?” Arlene was baffled.
“Those are YOUR voices, Arlene. They hide in YOUR head all the time. It’s simply your imagination.”
Arlene’s toes began to feel less icy. “I thought those things? I was that mean to myself?”
The Being placed a warm hand on Arlene’s back. “Sometimes we are our own worst enemies. We don’t like criticism from others, but we are far too hard on ourselves.”
“You could be right,” admitted Arlene. “I guess every day I looked in the mirror and could only think of things I'd like to improve about myself. I would always think, “…if only I…”
“One piece of advice I have for you, dearie, is that all those other people in the world? What are they thinking about?”
“Me?” offered Arlene. Somehow, she knew that wasn’t the right answer.
“No, no, dearie. They are all concentrating simply on themselves. Were you always thinking about them?”
Chagrined, Arlene shook her head “no.”
“Too bad I’m dead,” moaned Arlene. “Now I won’t have a chance to enjoy my life better without always second guessing myself.”
“Now who says you’re dead?” demanded the Being. “Did I say that? I wouldn’t have, because it’s not true!”
“I’m not?” Arlene began to feel a smile brighten her face. The sun on the horizon was glowing in earnest now. “Stop, what is your name? I need to thank you!” With the brightening of the sun, the Being faded from view.
Suddenly, Arlene found herself staring up at a circle of concerned friends. There was Clarabelle, there was Kenesha, and there were Margaret and even Bob.
“Ooh, this floor is hard,” Arlene moaned. “What happened?”
“You slipped, honey,” answered Bob. “You’ve been out like a light for a couple of minutes.”
“Arlene looked up at her friends fondly. “What a lovely color that is on you, Clarabelle. And Kenesha, I’m so happy you’re here. Margaret, thank you for helping Bob with the tables. “I don’t know what I would do without you all.”
The friends tittered and smiled. “We’re so happy you’re okay. In fact, you’re better than okay. You’ve woken up in such a good mood.”
“My goodness, I thought I had died! I’m really glad to be back!”
Arlene’s friends helped her up and the party continued on an upbeat note. But ever after, they wondered just what had happened to their previously dour friend. Not a day went by that Arlene didn’t compliment each of them. And it was so pleasant, they continued in kind.
And indeed it was.
In this Place was a darkness that had never known the idea of full light. The smells swirling about were rank like a bakery of sorts where aromas took on a misguided life of their own. There was a steaminess, first warm, then cold, that spoke of the memories of life, both good and bad. Arlene took this all in with perplexity. Why did she have a bad feeling about this place? And just what was that peculiar smell?
At first, Arlene drifted somewhat aimlessly. Strange muted sounds accompanied her, just below her ability to discern what they were. She felt like herself, and yet, not. So odd.
She had that feeling of being caught in a dream without escape. She didn’t try to understand. But yet, …and yet…It felt like a huge question was billowing around her like a cloud of noxious gas.
Why did she have that overwhelming, yet familiar, feeling of doubt?
As Arlene flowed through the dark miasma, she suddenly was thrust up against an embodiment in a white coat. Well, not white, exactly, but a neon greenish glowing figure who somehow projected helpfulness.
“Well, dearie, I’m here to provide guidance to you,” soothed the Being.
“Oh, what a relief!” breathed Arlene. “Where am I?” She tried to look around but realized she didn’t have to turn her neck to perceive everything around her. Not that any of it made any sense, of course. And then there was that sound again. Was it a distant skittering of a nervous squirrel?
“Don’t you know?” the Being replied. “You’ve had an unfortunate event, dear.”
“Have I?”
“You have.” The Being understood that she would have to break the news to Arlene very gently.
“You’re suffering from Amnesia. It’s a common result of folks in your condition,” replied the neon green glow.
“Condition? I do feel shivery and cold.” Arlene felt the disquieting sense of dread grow a bit larger. The scrambling squirrel sound seemed to have gained a nervous voice.
“I’m very sorry, my dear. You have hit your head very hard."
“Are you saying I died?” Arlene was briefly startled. “Have I crossed the Rainbow Bridge?” A hundred questions bubbled up in her mind like the effervescence in her favorite fizzy drink. But, just as suddenly, she realized that, if she had died, she actually didn’t care that much about it.
“What was that?!” This time the pesky ‘squirrel’ found its voice. “That Arlene never did lose any weight…”
“Oh my! That sounds exactly like my friend Clarabelle!” Arlene declared. “Is she down here too? And why is she saying mean things about me? She always was skinnier than I was. How dare she?!”
Arlene tried to look around her to catch sight of her friend. Alas, it was far too dark to see any details.
A new voice seemingly nagged at Arlene. “Now that that lump of lard is gone, we’ll get to see just how messy her house is.”
“Oh, why that sounded just like Kenesha.” Arlene felt so humiliated. She reflected on the fact that Kenesha’s house always had been spotless. “She was usually so nice to me. Why the shade?”
The Being just tut-tutted. If Arlene had been paying attention, she would have been aware that the Being was slowly shaking her head.
Arlene did remember just then that the Being had expressed that she was here to give Arlene guidance.
“You know, when someone dies, it is common to wish them ‘Rest in Peace.’ I’m not finding this peaceful at all,” Arlene was surprised to realize she felt a big sore lump in her throat developing. “I also thought that people generally remind each other not to speak ill of the dead. I guess my friends are not doing very well at that.”
Arlene tried once more to scan the dark shadows. ”So, is Kenesha down here with Clarabelle?”
From behind her, Arlene then heard the silly tittering of her girlfriend Margaret and…was that BOB, her husband?!
“I KNEW it!” exclaimed Arlene. “They are having an affair! I’ve suspected as much for months! How can I rest in peace down here if I am to be tormented by my so-called friends?”
The Being seemed to cross her arms in front of her chest. “Now, dearie, it is apparent that you need to spend some time in transition. Let me guide you.” Arlene found herself being gently ushered further down the path. Arlene couldn’t help sniffling a bit as they moved along.
Softly, the Being finally began to speak. “Do you realize, dearie, that Clarabelle is not here?”
“No? Are you sure? I know I heard her.” Arlene whimpered. “What about Kenesha? I’d know her voice anywhere.”
Again, the Being gently said, “No, not Kenesha, either.”
“And Margaret, the strumpet! I’ll never forgive her for moving on my man.” Arlene was truly upset. “And Bob! What about those vows?”
“Arlene, dear,” the Being spoke again. “None of those people are here. In fact, those voices are all in your own head.”
“No.” Arlene shook her head back and forth.
“Yes.” If it could, the Being would have been moving its head up and down. She enveloped Arlene in a warm cozy feeling. Arlene felt her shivering abate. There even seemed to be a slight glow of brightness ahead.
“How could I bring those voices with me?” Arlene was baffled.
“Those are YOUR voices, Arlene. They hide in YOUR head all the time. It’s simply your imagination.”
Arlene’s toes began to feel less icy. “I thought those things? I was that mean to myself?”
The Being placed a warm hand on Arlene’s back. “Sometimes we are our own worst enemies. We don’t like criticism from others, but we are far too hard on ourselves.”
“You could be right,” admitted Arlene. “I guess every day I looked in the mirror and could only think of things I'd like to improve about myself. I would always think, “…if only I…”
“One piece of advice I have for you, dearie, is that all those other people in the world? What are they thinking about?”
“Me?” offered Arlene. Somehow, she knew that wasn’t the right answer.
“No, no, dearie. They are all concentrating simply on themselves. Were you always thinking about them?”
Chagrined, Arlene shook her head “no.”
“Too bad I’m dead,” moaned Arlene. “Now I won’t have a chance to enjoy my life better without always second guessing myself.”
“Now who says you’re dead?” demanded the Being. “Did I say that? I wouldn’t have, because it’s not true!”
“I’m not?” Arlene began to feel a smile brighten her face. The sun on the horizon was glowing in earnest now. “Stop, what is your name? I need to thank you!” With the brightening of the sun, the Being faded from view.
Suddenly, Arlene found herself staring up at a circle of concerned friends. There was Clarabelle, there was Kenesha, and there were Margaret and even Bob.
“Ooh, this floor is hard,” Arlene moaned. “What happened?”
“You slipped, honey,” answered Bob. “You’ve been out like a light for a couple of minutes.”
“Arlene looked up at her friends fondly. “What a lovely color that is on you, Clarabelle. And Kenesha, I’m so happy you’re here. Margaret, thank you for helping Bob with the tables. “I don’t know what I would do without you all.”
The friends tittered and smiled. “We’re so happy you’re okay. In fact, you’re better than okay. You’ve woken up in such a good mood.”
“My goodness, I thought I had died! I’m really glad to be back!”
Arlene’s friends helped her up and the party continued on an upbeat note. But ever after, they wondered just what had happened to their previously dour friend. Not a day went by that Arlene didn’t compliment each of them. And it was so pleasant, they continued in kind.
And indeed it was.