Mar 16, 2009 18:58
I think i'm beginning to understand. I think I'm beginning to turn it around.
There's a new voice in my head. And i don't Want it to stop. I want it to be there forever.
It's the most beautiful thing i've ever heard. I'm completely captivated, yet i wont say anything. i can't say anything. what could i say?
i'm in the middle of stopping a freight train. it's been running a long long time with a heavy load. it used to be with my arms to the sky i'd take the step, but now i'm angry. now i have nothing but myself to put on the tracks.
am i tall enough? or will my own weight run me down?
i have to think positive. but what chance do i really have? reality is to real for me. show me a reason, and i'll overcome. show my ugly truth and i'll just sink back into my hole.
jesus christ, i'm fucking scared. i don't want to stop hearing this voice. i want it to be there forever. yet in all its beauty i can still see the venom. to me everything is always so far out of reach. i want to make a place for myself but i've been trapped for so long.
i need to stop this fucking train. people will see. people will be sorry. and left the fuck behind.
Theres a new voice in my head. and i don't want it to stop. in fact, i want to make it mine.
she is seriously one of the most beautiful things i've ever seen or heard.
no more crying until i've tried.
i need a fucking job.