I suspect I did know, but I forget everything anyway. Hurrah! And also, WTF? How does you self-identifying as gay invalidate bisexuals? That's like me dyeing a white stripe into my hair being treachery to brunettes. It's the exact same irrational muppet argument that people use when they say that gay people getting married will weaken marriage. MUPPET LOGIC IS NOT LOGIC!
Yes. I am waving my arms in the air like Animal. You are right to suspect as much.
Well, according to her, as A Gay I have "monosexual privilege" over bisexuals and also it's biphobia and bi erasure for gay people to "use bisexuality" in this manner (we should just stay in the closet and ONLY come out when we're ready to admit being Big Gay Gays, you see). [Full disclosure: all of the preceding is typed with a really sarcastic kind of face.]
Oh that's just the most utter load of crap. So, what, no one should have any sex, ever, until they know exactly what or who they want to end up with in case they make a labelling error? Isn't that what the Pope wants?
Mum had a friend who was a Big Name Lesbian and then, well into her fifties, she was sideswiped by falling in love with a man. She had a number of friends who never spoke to her again using the same spurious logic as above. Mum did, saying, 'One cock doesn't destroy a lifetime of minge.' She has a real turn of phrase, my Mum. Of course, they fell out awfully a few years later, but that's a wholly different story.
(Mum bought me Miss Piggy's Guide to Life when I was little, the Muppets are important in my life :-))
Actually, I sympathise with it going the other way; lesbians do have a number of valid reasons to not want to be around women who are into the D even if it's a one-time thing. Bihet women have, and still do, marginalise lesbians to a huge extent -- just look at today's sexpoz feminism and "we're not hairy lesbians; we LOVE to fuck men!11" Like if I had a penny for every time I saw someone holding up a poster that says "I need feminism because I shouldn't be called a lesbian for having short hair" (and similar sentiments), I'd have at least $2 by now. That's rank lesbophobia and I know a number of lesbians who refuse to associate with women who sleep with men because they're sick of that shit in their lives. I don't actually think there's anything wrong with that (if we lived in a gender-equal, sexuality-equal world, we could talk about it being "unfair" but, well
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I don't agree: these aren't random women making a statement, these were her close friends. She'd never even kissed a boy until her 50s. Her argument, which I have time for, is that she formed her whole adult identity as a lesbian. She now doesn't call herself an active lesbian (or straight, or bi, she says no to sexuality labels), but she does defend vigirously her right to say that aside from this relationship, she has been a lesbian for as long as she has experienced sexual yearnings and to not have that called into doubt by anyone
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Oh wow yes I do agree with you and sympathise with your mum's friend being abandoned, and if her friends were not lez sep then it was really shitty of them to cut her out like that
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I do agree with you that the shift in identity is definitely different, it was the external judgement and labelling that struck me as similar. Damn judgers!
The analogy is my gift to you. Let me know if you need a cricket bat to go with it!
Yes. I am waving my arms in the air like Animal. You are right to suspect as much.
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(haha that is excellent :D)
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Mum had a friend who was a Big Name Lesbian and then, well into her fifties, she was sideswiped by falling in love with a man. She had a number of friends who never spoke to her again using the same spurious logic as above. Mum did, saying, 'One cock doesn't destroy a lifetime of minge.' She has a real turn of phrase, my Mum. Of course, they fell out awfully a few years later, but that's a wholly different story.
(Mum bought me Miss Piggy's Guide to Life when I was little, the Muppets are important in my life :-))
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The analogy is my gift to you. Let me know if you need a cricket bat to go with it!
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