all my life i've been good but now i'm thinking what the hell
dannyx2x7x (11:08:07 PM): im still not over u baby. im not over the fact that someone else has the one commodity in my life that was exactly wut i wanted. somebody else has that one and only shirt in the world that fits me perfectly. i hate unraveling myself like this and i have never really done it for anyone, but its been months and im just at a point where i dont know wut else to do. i dont care about myself or anyone else as much as i still care about u. believe me i dont choose it to be this way, but at this point it just is wut it is. i understand that u moved on and u are more or less done with wut we started, and to be honest with you, if you REALLY are going to be happier with him, then i am truly happy for u, but its just not easy for me to watch, because no matter wut i see him do for u, i will always think that u are making a mistake because i could have done it better
this is from over a month ago, but i reread it recently and it made me smile i guess...
anthony and i are taking a break...how long is up for grabs. he is just too intense for me. he's like all ready to get married and move in and that shit and i'm like DUDE I'M TWENTY ONE. i need time to grow up, or at least to be with someone who is still growing up with me.
i've since deactivated my facebook because he stalks it, and if he did while i was his g/f it will probably increase tenfold once i told him i need a break. there was just so much wrong with that relationship that i let slide and i shouldn't have. i should have to sensor myself so i dont offend him, i shouldnt have to tell my ex that just came home from war that i can't see him because anthony will get upset so i'm done. we'll see what time has to offer.
in the meantime i'm going on vacation with chantal in 18 days? yeah its gonna be amazing.
and i've been able to hangout with danny which is great, we just get along that well. he came with me to get my tattoo touched up yesterday because i needed someone to distract me. after we went to his house and he went downstairs with joel and they recorded music and i talked to his mom for like 4 hours. it was so comfortable, i just love his family. and joel was even really nice, which i wasn't sure how that would go because obviously he knows whats going on with steph but i dont want any part of it. i talk to danny when they fiight but i stay impartial, it isn't my business, its his. his mom and i discussed everything from good booze to vacations to his deployment. i found out that she really stood up for me when he came home and explained how hard it is for everyone here. i think what she said to him is why he and i can talk and be friends and i'm so thankful for that. seriously he has the best mom ever, we told him that he was gonna move to my house and i'd take his room instead cause they like me better. thats comfort right there :)
right now its just nice to not have a clingy boyfriend to worry about and to have my best friend back, i'll deal with everything else later.
this is from over a month ago, but i reread it recently and it made me smile i guess...
anthony and i are taking a break...how long is up for grabs. he is just too intense for me. he's like all ready to get married and move in and that shit and i'm like DUDE I'M TWENTY ONE. i need time to grow up, or at least to be with someone who is still growing up with me.
i've since deactivated my facebook because he stalks it, and if he did while i was his g/f it will probably increase tenfold once i told him i need a break. there was just so much wrong with that relationship that i let slide and i shouldn't have. i should have to sensor myself so i dont offend him, i shouldnt have to tell my ex that just came home from war that i can't see him because anthony will get upset so i'm done. we'll see what time has to offer.
in the meantime i'm going on vacation with chantal in 18 days? yeah its gonna be amazing.
and i've been able to hangout with danny which is great, we just get along that well. he came with me to get my tattoo touched up yesterday because i needed someone to distract me. after we went to his house and he went downstairs with joel and they recorded music and i talked to his mom for like 4 hours. it was so comfortable, i just love his family. and joel was even really nice, which i wasn't sure how that would go because obviously he knows whats going on with steph but i dont want any part of it. i talk to danny when they fiight but i stay impartial, it isn't my business, its his. his mom and i discussed everything from good booze to vacations to his deployment. i found out that she really stood up for me when he came home and explained how hard it is for everyone here. i think what she said to him is why he and i can talk and be friends and i'm so thankful for that. seriously he has the best mom ever, we told him that he was gonna move to my house and i'd take his room instead cause they like me better. thats comfort right there :)
right now its just nice to not have a clingy boyfriend to worry about and to have my best friend back, i'll deal with everything else later.