help.
he says he wants to take a break.. "be me.. not we".
he's switching schools and he wants to see what's out there.
i understand where he's coming from but i don't want it too happen.
he wants things that i can't give him.
i cant do anything about this.
he wants to try new things.
go out with different girls.
im holding him back.
im holding him back from alot of things.
he doesn't kno how sorry i am for that.
he doesn't kno how much i love him.
i want this day to never exsist.
happy one moment...
in tears the next...
hidding from my mom... just to let her think im ok.
im not ok.
i won't be ok.
i never have been ok.
im lieing to myself to think im ok.
lieing to everyone else and i've even fooled me.
this doesn't even have to do with him now.
heres a step back into reality.. nothing will go as planned..
exactly.
so many plans with him..
gone..
vanished..
and yet i still don't kno if we're together er not.
not a word is being said about this..
and im afraid to bring it up for fear that i won't like what follows.
i don't get guys.
they're so confusing.
er maybe i just make them confusing...?
i give up.
maybe i should just forget all this.
forget it happend right?
pretend im dreaming...
he's joking..
this isn't true..
he's just doing another one of jokes..
like he always does..
but what if it's not...
im afraid to wake up tomorrow..
im afriad of today...............
he's switching schools and he wants to see what's out there.
i understand where he's coming from but i don't want it too happen.
he wants things that i can't give him.
i cant do anything about this.
he wants to try new things.
go out with different girls.
im holding him back.
im holding him back from alot of things.
he doesn't kno how sorry i am for that.
he doesn't kno how much i love him.
i want this day to never exsist.
happy one moment...
in tears the next...
hidding from my mom... just to let her think im ok.
im not ok.
i won't be ok.
i never have been ok.
im lieing to myself to think im ok.
lieing to everyone else and i've even fooled me.
this doesn't even have to do with him now.
heres a step back into reality.. nothing will go as planned..
exactly.
so many plans with him..
gone..
vanished..
and yet i still don't kno if we're together er not.
not a word is being said about this..
and im afraid to bring it up for fear that i won't like what follows.
i don't get guys.
they're so confusing.
er maybe i just make them confusing...?
i give up.
maybe i should just forget all this.
forget it happend right?
pretend im dreaming...
he's joking..
this isn't true..
he's just doing another one of jokes..
like he always does..
but what if it's not...
im afraid to wake up tomorrow..
im afriad of today...............