Stupid Misadventures
I guess every day is an adventure, but today was just a really lame one that for some reason compelled me to update.
The day began when my one roommate was being loud while getting dressed in the morning and had his shirt off. I rolled over and saw him with his shirt off, and he's like incredibly hairy. Like, crazy Italian guy named Bruno hairy. So I sat up and this exchange occurred:
Josh: "Hey Rich, that's a nice sweater. Does it come in a V-neck?"
Rich: "FUCK YOU!!!!"
I rolled back over and fell asleep for another four hours. Starting your day with 40 Year Old Virgin quote makes life an exciting thing.
I woke up and had to take care of some shit today. I've been incredibly lazy and had to fix my whole voter registration thing. I'll get to my exact predicament in a second, but I simply HAVE to tell this little side anecdote:
I've been volunteering for the Obama campaign headquarters in downtown Pittsburgh. It hasn't been too intense, but I've been going on the street and registering people to vote. Don't worry, I'm not one of those annoying people who will literally hunt you, poach you even to get you to register with them. Anyways, through this process, I am literally SHOCKED at the amount of stupid people there are in downtown Pittsburgh. Well, perhaps not just in downtown Pittsburgh, I'm sure this reigns true for the entire United States...but still. There is a section of the voter registration form (which is an INCREDIBLY easy, short form, by the way) that says County. And guess what? THREE. Count 'em. THREE forms I got said "USA" in that section.
...
So lemme get this straight? You're registering to vote for the President of the United States...and you think the registration form is asking you what country you're from? WHAT THE FUCK!??!? I think that this should be a test. If you fail the registration form you should not be allowed to vote until the next election. You're fucking retarded. I'm sorry to be so blunt, but it's that simple. USA. Give me a break.
Right! So! Back to the main story. I had to figure out how the HELL I'm going to vote absentee for Ohio with my current registration situation. (I would just register and vote in Pennsylvania, but Ohio is a bigger battleground state which McCain is currently leading in sadly, so don't worry Barack...I got you covered in Ohio). So I go on Obama's website because it has some sort of engine that tells you who to contact to get absentee ballots and such. It has no idea who the fuck I am sadly. I confused the system with this predicament:
I'm from Cuyahoga County. I'm registered to vote in Athens County. And I'm currently living in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.
Yeah. That sucks. So I called the number that the Obama thing gave me after it pretty much said to me "I don't know what the fuck you're even talking about", but I had NO idea where/who/what I was calling. The phone rings 9 times....
"Hi, you've reached the office of Ohio's Secretary of State, Jennifer Brunner, this is Stacy."
Secretary of State's office? The number gave me THAT?! WTF! Okay! So I went with it. I told her my exact predicament, and that I wanted to vote absentee in Ohio. She literally laughed at me. "Wow, that's a new one." Wow. No shit. She eventually forwarded me to the Athens County Board of Elections.
There was no doubt in my mind that the woman there was a resident of Athens, Ohio. She was fucking retarded. But she basically was like "YOU CANNOT VOTE IN ATHENS!" So I said well thanks for nothing and looked up the number to the Cuyahoga County Board of Elections. Called there, it was plain and simple. Filled out a new voter registration for Cuyahoga County, and then sent with it an absentee request form. Plain and simple was turned into like a half hours worth of work.
Later, I was looking for a place to get my hair cut, and was walking with my friend Miguel. He is a really cool dude, and he's from Anguilla which is a caribbean island that is close to the Virgin Islands. Well, he took me into this store, that I'm sadly I can only classify as a black store. Soulja boy, Jay-Z, T Pain blastin'. I was the only white male in there. And somehow, in my Aeropostale polo, I didn't quite fit in. What do you think? Do I look like the kind of guy to sport Rocawear? No? Didn't think so. It was incredibly awkward. I looked at one of the sales associates' nametags, and it said "$$Money$$". Oh grand. Her name is money. I wonder if that a family name? Sigh. It was so fucking awkward.
My day was then followed by the worst haircut ever by an old man who was your CLASSIC Pittsburgh citizen. I didn't dare mention my affiliation with Cleveland. He said "Yins" about 9 times during our haircut experience. I look like I'm fucking eight. I hate it. Fuck bad haircuts. I miss Angela.
After that I then proceeded to lose the Wicked lottery (big surprise), and now I'm back here. Fairly interesting for a lame ass day, I'd say.
The day began when my one roommate was being loud while getting dressed in the morning and had his shirt off. I rolled over and saw him with his shirt off, and he's like incredibly hairy. Like, crazy Italian guy named Bruno hairy. So I sat up and this exchange occurred:
Josh: "Hey Rich, that's a nice sweater. Does it come in a V-neck?"
Rich: "FUCK YOU!!!!"
I rolled back over and fell asleep for another four hours. Starting your day with 40 Year Old Virgin quote makes life an exciting thing.
I woke up and had to take care of some shit today. I've been incredibly lazy and had to fix my whole voter registration thing. I'll get to my exact predicament in a second, but I simply HAVE to tell this little side anecdote:
I've been volunteering for the Obama campaign headquarters in downtown Pittsburgh. It hasn't been too intense, but I've been going on the street and registering people to vote. Don't worry, I'm not one of those annoying people who will literally hunt you, poach you even to get you to register with them. Anyways, through this process, I am literally SHOCKED at the amount of stupid people there are in downtown Pittsburgh. Well, perhaps not just in downtown Pittsburgh, I'm sure this reigns true for the entire United States...but still. There is a section of the voter registration form (which is an INCREDIBLY easy, short form, by the way) that says County. And guess what? THREE. Count 'em. THREE forms I got said "USA" in that section.
...
So lemme get this straight? You're registering to vote for the President of the United States...and you think the registration form is asking you what country you're from? WHAT THE FUCK!??!? I think that this should be a test. If you fail the registration form you should not be allowed to vote until the next election. You're fucking retarded. I'm sorry to be so blunt, but it's that simple. USA. Give me a break.
Right! So! Back to the main story. I had to figure out how the HELL I'm going to vote absentee for Ohio with my current registration situation. (I would just register and vote in Pennsylvania, but Ohio is a bigger battleground state which McCain is currently leading in sadly, so don't worry Barack...I got you covered in Ohio). So I go on Obama's website because it has some sort of engine that tells you who to contact to get absentee ballots and such. It has no idea who the fuck I am sadly. I confused the system with this predicament:
I'm from Cuyahoga County. I'm registered to vote in Athens County. And I'm currently living in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.
Yeah. That sucks. So I called the number that the Obama thing gave me after it pretty much said to me "I don't know what the fuck you're even talking about", but I had NO idea where/who/what I was calling. The phone rings 9 times....
"Hi, you've reached the office of Ohio's Secretary of State, Jennifer Brunner, this is Stacy."
Secretary of State's office? The number gave me THAT?! WTF! Okay! So I went with it. I told her my exact predicament, and that I wanted to vote absentee in Ohio. She literally laughed at me. "Wow, that's a new one." Wow. No shit. She eventually forwarded me to the Athens County Board of Elections.
There was no doubt in my mind that the woman there was a resident of Athens, Ohio. She was fucking retarded. But she basically was like "YOU CANNOT VOTE IN ATHENS!" So I said well thanks for nothing and looked up the number to the Cuyahoga County Board of Elections. Called there, it was plain and simple. Filled out a new voter registration for Cuyahoga County, and then sent with it an absentee request form. Plain and simple was turned into like a half hours worth of work.
Later, I was looking for a place to get my hair cut, and was walking with my friend Miguel. He is a really cool dude, and he's from Anguilla which is a caribbean island that is close to the Virgin Islands. Well, he took me into this store, that I'm sadly I can only classify as a black store. Soulja boy, Jay-Z, T Pain blastin'. I was the only white male in there. And somehow, in my Aeropostale polo, I didn't quite fit in. What do you think? Do I look like the kind of guy to sport Rocawear? No? Didn't think so. It was incredibly awkward. I looked at one of the sales associates' nametags, and it said "$$Money$$". Oh grand. Her name is money. I wonder if that a family name? Sigh. It was so fucking awkward.
My day was then followed by the worst haircut ever by an old man who was your CLASSIC Pittsburgh citizen. I didn't dare mention my affiliation with Cleveland. He said "Yins" about 9 times during our haircut experience. I look like I'm fucking eight. I hate it. Fuck bad haircuts. I miss Angela.
After that I then proceeded to lose the Wicked lottery (big surprise), and now I'm back here. Fairly interesting for a lame ass day, I'd say.