why the sudden urge
everyone gets it. but why now?
why do i get the urge to write in this damn thing everyday now?
after all im not that type to type my thoughts into a computer. mabye that answers the last question that i had on life journal. I type jiberish because i need to write at this stage in my life, i need to let things go so to speak. however i am not willing to write people's names or there secrets. i have learnt not to gossip, or tell people about over people. thats how i nearly lost a close friendship with someone that i admire and trust with my secrets. Yes i let that trust that they had in me down and for that i am truly sorry, it was a fucked thing to do. Although i may have recieved their forgiveness; I am yet to forgive myself. I also know that the trust/relationship that we had in each other will take a while to come back but god damn it i am willing to put in the hard yards. I can tell you all that i am sick to death of bitching around canberra, sometimes i would like nothing more than to escape and move away to become a hippy. You see i have this thing that if sometimes someone gives me the shits i will tell another person about it without thinking twice, that is a floor that i have and something that i need to work on.
Anyhow although only one person in my life knows what i am yabbering about, it makes sence to me. And i think that this a valueable lesson for all to learn. We make mistakes and learn from them and that is what i have done now.
love,
peatie
