I relied on your promise to my detriment.....
What a freaking weekend. I finally realized how old I am getting, I just cant do the whole 9 debate rounds in one day, not eating, drinking lots of caffiene, running every where, and sleeping a few hours every night. Today I woke up and my body screamed out in pain. My muscles were pissed...my brain even hurt. And its not like when I was debating and could come back from a weekend of debating and sleep the whole next day, skipping class and work. Law school for some odd reason does not care about debate. They do not give a crap that I was running all around St. Louis in the pouring down rain. My prof doesnt care that im so tired I can barely type the notes that he is insisting that I need. I mean seriously, the one day im exhausted, my property prof decides that he is actually going to teach me something I need to pay attention to and understand. What a fucker.
But this weekend was nice. It was great getting to go back and see everyone that was such a huge part of my life. Its weird too. I havent seen some of them for almost 9 months now, but you wouldnt know it. We acted just like we used too. Telling the same stories, sharing the same problems, reliving the past. They are the people who know more about me than I care to actually admit. You can say whatever, and it doesnt shock them. Its such a great feeling. Yet, at the same time sometimes it stings. People ask questions, bring up things that happen or someone who was a huge part of your life but no longer is. I found my breath being taken from my body, my heart stopping numerous times throughout the weekend. These friends dont allow you to just say, "o things are fine." They know when your lying thru your teeth. They know what is hard and what you enjoy. And thats why I love them all soo much.
It was actually more of a challenge to judge that I thought it would be when I was competing. When your competing the round is soo clear in your head. You think that you win "almost" every round. You think you said the arguements, made the right decisions asked the right questions. But then when your on the other side of the table, its not that clear. You sit there judging wondering silently why in the hell the debator is arguing what they are. They spend way to much time on things that dont matter and completely under cover the issues that are really at stake. I found myself also struggingly w/ the fact that debate is changing. When I was debating, Kritques werent a big deal, there were not framework debates and all this metadebate and other stuff. Or maybe there was but I never encountered it. So since I dont believe in learning anything that i dont need to know, I never learned any of that. So I am being asked to judge and decide rounds where I really do not have any background information on what is being debated. It was hard, but I was able to learn a lot more than I ever thought I would.
I also found myself writing things on ballots that I used to read on my own and would get flaming pissed about. Things that I said I would never care about when I was judging, but really when the time comes it does matters.
So to recap...
Thrusday...we made the long trek down to St. Louis. Not a bad drive, got to catch up w/ Deb. It was awesome. That night, Kourt, Matt and I got drunk. Really fast in about the span of an hour.
Friday...woke up way to early. Headed to Webster. Spent the day running all over campus judging tons of rounds. Catching up w/ old friends and being Chris' bitch;) haha just kidding. I was just being nice to him, b/c i know how stressful tournys are. That night he and I got to spend some time together. Which was soo wonderful. We ate at my fav little Mexican restaurant and i had a fab drink. It was so much fun to hear about his debate rounds, for hours;) We wandered all over Westport. Went to bed way to late.
Saturday...woke up even earlier than Friday. Judged all day...then at night I drank some Red Strip. Thanks Matt. It was nice though b/c we had a break later in the day to get some dinner before finishing out the night w/ the last debate rounds. Subway never tasted so good. So dinner wasnt so hard to manage as it was the night before b/c everything was closed. Hung out w/ Chris again. Went to the hotel bar, heard some funny stories about DoubleDee and Evans. Cracked my shit right up;) Drank some more. Chris and i went to the top of the ramp and it was so beautiful out at night. I mean not too cold, clear sky. It was nice. Then went and argued about debate and my judging a specific round. It seems that my way of thinking is very odd, but I always get to the right decision;) Went to bed really late again.
Sunday...got to sleep in a little. Walked to McDonalds. A preacher told Chris that it was a confusing area. To which he replies "hell yea." OMG...we got out of there in a hurry. Judged a few rounds. Hung out all day. Ate some St. Louis Bread Company. Layed around. It was relaxing and well needed after the long weekend. Then it was time to leave. It was hard to bring myself to leave after such a great experience.
All in all, it was a great weekend. I had a ton of fun and got to see lots of my friends and maybe even made some new ones. I hope that I get to come to NFA and relive the experience again. It also made me a little sad taht Im not part of the debate community anymore. I wish I could do more, but I guess thats not the path my life is taking at the current time. Now its back to the grind, gotta get my outlines done...AHHH.
::darling when i see, i see me...::
But this weekend was nice. It was great getting to go back and see everyone that was such a huge part of my life. Its weird too. I havent seen some of them for almost 9 months now, but you wouldnt know it. We acted just like we used too. Telling the same stories, sharing the same problems, reliving the past. They are the people who know more about me than I care to actually admit. You can say whatever, and it doesnt shock them. Its such a great feeling. Yet, at the same time sometimes it stings. People ask questions, bring up things that happen or someone who was a huge part of your life but no longer is. I found my breath being taken from my body, my heart stopping numerous times throughout the weekend. These friends dont allow you to just say, "o things are fine." They know when your lying thru your teeth. They know what is hard and what you enjoy. And thats why I love them all soo much.
It was actually more of a challenge to judge that I thought it would be when I was competing. When your competing the round is soo clear in your head. You think that you win "almost" every round. You think you said the arguements, made the right decisions asked the right questions. But then when your on the other side of the table, its not that clear. You sit there judging wondering silently why in the hell the debator is arguing what they are. They spend way to much time on things that dont matter and completely under cover the issues that are really at stake. I found myself also struggingly w/ the fact that debate is changing. When I was debating, Kritques werent a big deal, there were not framework debates and all this metadebate and other stuff. Or maybe there was but I never encountered it. So since I dont believe in learning anything that i dont need to know, I never learned any of that. So I am being asked to judge and decide rounds where I really do not have any background information on what is being debated. It was hard, but I was able to learn a lot more than I ever thought I would.
I also found myself writing things on ballots that I used to read on my own and would get flaming pissed about. Things that I said I would never care about when I was judging, but really when the time comes it does matters.
So to recap...
Thrusday...we made the long trek down to St. Louis. Not a bad drive, got to catch up w/ Deb. It was awesome. That night, Kourt, Matt and I got drunk. Really fast in about the span of an hour.
Friday...woke up way to early. Headed to Webster. Spent the day running all over campus judging tons of rounds. Catching up w/ old friends and being Chris' bitch;) haha just kidding. I was just being nice to him, b/c i know how stressful tournys are. That night he and I got to spend some time together. Which was soo wonderful. We ate at my fav little Mexican restaurant and i had a fab drink. It was so much fun to hear about his debate rounds, for hours;) We wandered all over Westport. Went to bed way to late.
Saturday...woke up even earlier than Friday. Judged all day...then at night I drank some Red Strip. Thanks Matt. It was nice though b/c we had a break later in the day to get some dinner before finishing out the night w/ the last debate rounds. Subway never tasted so good. So dinner wasnt so hard to manage as it was the night before b/c everything was closed. Hung out w/ Chris again. Went to the hotel bar, heard some funny stories about DoubleDee and Evans. Cracked my shit right up;) Drank some more. Chris and i went to the top of the ramp and it was so beautiful out at night. I mean not too cold, clear sky. It was nice. Then went and argued about debate and my judging a specific round. It seems that my way of thinking is very odd, but I always get to the right decision;) Went to bed really late again.
Sunday...got to sleep in a little. Walked to McDonalds. A preacher told Chris that it was a confusing area. To which he replies "hell yea." OMG...we got out of there in a hurry. Judged a few rounds. Hung out all day. Ate some St. Louis Bread Company. Layed around. It was relaxing and well needed after the long weekend. Then it was time to leave. It was hard to bring myself to leave after such a great experience.
All in all, it was a great weekend. I had a ton of fun and got to see lots of my friends and maybe even made some new ones. I hope that I get to come to NFA and relive the experience again. It also made me a little sad taht Im not part of the debate community anymore. I wish I could do more, but I guess thats not the path my life is taking at the current time. Now its back to the grind, gotta get my outlines done...AHHH.
::darling when i see, i see me...::