Karma II
i know that you never meant to do everything you put me through, its ok i forgive you, just know that when you see me cringe sometimes, im trying to rid the poison from my mind...
I was starting to get nervous. The people who I consider to be complete and utter assholes, were still winning. They were still stomping all over my heart and taking me for granted. I was beginning to believe that maybe Karma was on vacation, I continued to see these people and they continued to seem happy to me. But after yesterday I have decided that Karma is back and better than ever. Finally, the gods are starting to even the score, even if just for a little bit. There are too scores in particular....
how can you ask me to stay when all you ever do is go...
The first one being the first male who ever treated me like crap and walked out on my family. My dad has caused me extreme angst over the years. While i argue to the world there is no such thing as "daddy-issues," in my life there are. I meet all the stereotypical studies that have been done on females who grew up with a non-existant or abusive father. I was promisicious early on in my life, i have had my fair share of dealing w/ "substances" and I constantly date boys who are just like my father. Its like an addiction that i have deep in my soul...so basically to say ive been dealing with these issues my entire life, and they dont get easier with time. However, whenever i have been forced to have interaction w/ my father it always get under my skin. He seemed so happy, so unaware of how he broke my heart, so clueless as to what it was like to grow up without a father and having to watch my mom work her ass off to support my brother and I. The last time I saw him in particular because he still was insisting after 10 years to be a douchebag to my mom, like that will win you brownie points. If i ripped your heart apart at the seams maybe then youd would know how i feel. So anyways, last night I found out Karma did strike finally, and the score has been evened. Now he is the one who is alone and has no one to love him. He finally knows what it feels like to be abandoned. I guess I should feel sorry for him, be the better person and not rejoice in his sorrows but gosh, the little girl in me just cant do that. She is jumping up and down inside of me saying, "i told you so, i told you so."
I was a fool to think i should have stopped you from undressing...
The second one being the last person to walk all over my soul. Lets just say, what goes around, comes around. And it finally came around. . .
i kiss your neck, i feel you breathing on my shoulder...
I was starting to get nervous. The people who I consider to be complete and utter assholes, were still winning. They were still stomping all over my heart and taking me for granted. I was beginning to believe that maybe Karma was on vacation, I continued to see these people and they continued to seem happy to me. But after yesterday I have decided that Karma is back and better than ever. Finally, the gods are starting to even the score, even if just for a little bit. There are too scores in particular....
how can you ask me to stay when all you ever do is go...
The first one being the first male who ever treated me like crap and walked out on my family. My dad has caused me extreme angst over the years. While i argue to the world there is no such thing as "daddy-issues," in my life there are. I meet all the stereotypical studies that have been done on females who grew up with a non-existant or abusive father. I was promisicious early on in my life, i have had my fair share of dealing w/ "substances" and I constantly date boys who are just like my father. Its like an addiction that i have deep in my soul...so basically to say ive been dealing with these issues my entire life, and they dont get easier with time. However, whenever i have been forced to have interaction w/ my father it always get under my skin. He seemed so happy, so unaware of how he broke my heart, so clueless as to what it was like to grow up without a father and having to watch my mom work her ass off to support my brother and I. The last time I saw him in particular because he still was insisting after 10 years to be a douchebag to my mom, like that will win you brownie points. If i ripped your heart apart at the seams maybe then youd would know how i feel. So anyways, last night I found out Karma did strike finally, and the score has been evened. Now he is the one who is alone and has no one to love him. He finally knows what it feels like to be abandoned. I guess I should feel sorry for him, be the better person and not rejoice in his sorrows but gosh, the little girl in me just cant do that. She is jumping up and down inside of me saying, "i told you so, i told you so."
I was a fool to think i should have stopped you from undressing...
The second one being the last person to walk all over my soul. Lets just say, what goes around, comes around. And it finally came around. . .
i kiss your neck, i feel you breathing on my shoulder...