Up, Down, and Sideways
The past couple of weeks have gone by with motion blur. I felt like I was standing in the center of a tornado, and every once in a while I would blow into it and feed into the winds.
My brother was going to get sent to Iraq. The brother who had been to Afghanistan, been injured in combat, was sent home, and now has permanent hearing loss and tinnitus, was going to get sent back to Iraq. He'd been home for two years. He'd found a civilian job, a woman that he loved. He'd found a new life. He was going to get married. Then he opened up his mail box and there was a letter inside saying that he had been called back to active duty and that he had to report to Georgia in thirty days.
So my brother got married. Three weeks ago he got married. It was meant to be a small service, but my newest sister-in-law doesn't have anything akin to a small family. Twelve invites quickly became forty, and then you add in some guests on top. I was the Best Man and I got to stand beside my brother as he stepped into marriage. I couldn't have been prouder.
Then he flew to Georgia a week later. And a week after that he flew back home. You see, the Army didn't like that he had hearing loss, but they threw him back in the water because of his hernia. Never before in my life have I been happy because my brother is fucked up.
And to top it all off, I broke up with my girlfriend. It was... necessary. I hated doing it, but I needed to. I felt like I was being attacked for everything that I did. That I couldn't talk to her about what was going on with me and my life because... because she was too busy making my life seem small and hers huge. She didn't love me, though she said she did. She just loved the warm body in the bed next to her.
So maybe I'm single for a while. For a long, long while. But my brother's home and he's got a hernia. I'll take that any damned day of the week.
My brother was going to get sent to Iraq. The brother who had been to Afghanistan, been injured in combat, was sent home, and now has permanent hearing loss and tinnitus, was going to get sent back to Iraq. He'd been home for two years. He'd found a civilian job, a woman that he loved. He'd found a new life. He was going to get married. Then he opened up his mail box and there was a letter inside saying that he had been called back to active duty and that he had to report to Georgia in thirty days.
So my brother got married. Three weeks ago he got married. It was meant to be a small service, but my newest sister-in-law doesn't have anything akin to a small family. Twelve invites quickly became forty, and then you add in some guests on top. I was the Best Man and I got to stand beside my brother as he stepped into marriage. I couldn't have been prouder.
Then he flew to Georgia a week later. And a week after that he flew back home. You see, the Army didn't like that he had hearing loss, but they threw him back in the water because of his hernia. Never before in my life have I been happy because my brother is fucked up.
And to top it all off, I broke up with my girlfriend. It was... necessary. I hated doing it, but I needed to. I felt like I was being attacked for everything that I did. That I couldn't talk to her about what was going on with me and my life because... because she was too busy making my life seem small and hers huge. She didn't love me, though she said she did. She just loved the warm body in the bed next to her.
So maybe I'm single for a while. For a long, long while. But my brother's home and he's got a hernia. I'll take that any damned day of the week.