Author: laraF
laraflameTitle: Derek’s Nursery for Wayward Wolves
Rating: PG-13
Pairing/s: Peter/Stiles
Character/s: Derek, Peter, Stiles, Scott, Erica, Boyd, Isaac, Lydia, Allison, Malia, Cora, Meredith mentioned
Summary: Derek is truly happy for Peter and Stiles. Peter is more bearable when his sassy counterpart is around. Okay, that’s not true. They make a terrifying duo. Especially when they’re waging a war about musical taste.
Or: Derek is resigned, Scott is whining, Boyd is one fine businessman, Erica is delighted, Malia experiences the worst role-models ever and Lydia facepalms. A lot.
Warnings: CRACK, it’s a shameless crack-fic, guys
Content Notes: Fluff, fluffy fluffiness. EVERYONE LIVES, by the way. (Seriously bad guys like Gerard doesn’t count. He could be dead for all I care.) Post Season 3A.
Submission Type: Ficlet
Word Count: 1000
Prompt: #180 - Fireworks
Author's Notes: Well. So many deaths in this year, don't you think? Totally agreeing with
tryslora - I needed something fun and silly in my life! xoxo From Derek’s POV, ‘cause he’s hilarious.
All in all, Derek was morbidly satisfied with Stiles and Peter being in a... romantic relationship, if someone could call the excessive use of sarcasm, the seemingly violent manhandling (from Peter's part) and derogatory comments romantic. Yeah, it was weird but hey, none of those two were actually standard persons. Besides he should be the last creature to criticize someone about their love life. Seriously. Scott on the other hand made a true spectacle out of his melodramatic suffering. He was loud, protested constantly and way too irritatingly. And since they tended to work together Derek started to understand Peter's attitude toward his former beta. Man, could he whine and whimper like a spoiled puppy. Really, he started to get on Derek's nerves (which wasn't that hard, now that he thought about it). If there was anyone to blame, it was him and Scott, after all. As resident alphas of the town - and finally with a more or less complete pack under their proverbial paws - they were responsible for that two, even if they didn't like it (because Peter, duh). Undoubtedly the sassy duo was the most intelligent and vulnerable among their members except Lydia. But Lydia declared that she should absolutely remain a last resort. She just began getting used to this whole banshee-business. She frequently visited some Meredith in Eichen House, Beacon Hills' fishy asylum, whose existence she found out after meticulously foraging through her grandmother's stuff. Anyway; she refused to breathe in the same air as Peter, so. (Understandable.) It was obvious that they should remain in the loft's relative safety when the pack went to beat the living hell out of the latest supernatural troop that tried their luck in their hometown. (Not that Peter would've listened to Derek if he told him to stay. He was just an arrogant, selfish, lazy and most importantly significantly weakened prick after his resurrection and wasn't very inclined to risk his newly acquired skin. Again, understandable.)
Scott worried an unhealthy amount about Stiles and 'your psychotic, serial killer zombie uncle' being in the same room. Derek wasn't sure if he willingly closed his eyes (and nose) to his best friend's and Peter's similarities and painfully mutual attraction or he was simply oblivious. Either way, it became crystal clear in only two busy weeks after the Alpha-pack's hasty retreat - seasoned with a lost water-ghost and an obstinate witch coven - that in addition to dutifully helping out the pack they dedicated the remaining time to thoroughly desecrate Derek's furniture. That didn't make him very happy which amused Erica, Isaac and Cora way too much. Although the most outrageous proved to be Boyd of all people. He acted as bookmaker in connection with everything Peter and Stiles related - their first kiss, who initiated it, who made the very first move (and that was the hardest to determine), where they had sex the first time and so on. Derek had to bodily threaten the love-birds to restrain themselves. Of course that was oil to the fire. Peter deliberately held a marathon in Derek's bed with Stiles after his outburst. That asshole.
Derek ordered a new bed amongst furious (and ineffective) scowls as Isaac's unhelpful snickers in the background joined Peter's soft laughs, Stiles's indignant mutters and Erica's uncontrolled guffaws. What his life had become...
The final move that caused Scott to go haywire was the incident Allison called the Epic Musical Challenge. Peter - to use Stiles's words - from some inexplicable reason had 'Methuselah-like' taste in music. His miraculously intact vinyl collection always brought a genuine smile to Derek's lips. He remembered listening to AC/DC, Rolling Stones, Guns 'n' Roses, Aerosmith, Metallica or Kurt Cobain in Peter's flat when he seldom took him there. Peter always liked his privacy and always had a soft spot for him. Anyhow, his uncle retorted with 'then I would listen to eunuchs indecorous meowing' which left Stiles sputtering for a moment (he clearly defied the urge to laugh). The initial bafflement faded though and Stiles launched his first attack with changing the Queen CD in Peter's car to One Direction. Peter was livid. He almost crashed his fancy Audi to Derek's and Scott's immense delight. Retaliation was brutal. All the teenagers could stand witness. During a totally boring Maths lesson a velvet-smooth, sly male voice - definitely belonging to Peter - announced that 'the next song is for Stiles Stilinski, the love of my life. Hopefully he gets the message.' When AC/DC's Ballbreaker started to blare from the speakers Scott and Erica respectively almost had a seizure in the mirthful chaos that ensued - one from sympathetic shame, the other from dangerous glee. Upon questioning about his access to official school equipment Peter admitted to flirting with the janitor. Stiles stirred laxative into his irrationally expensive mineral water that evening.
The next phase arrived fairly late. Derek thought that the opponents laid low to sniff out the other's tactic. By the way they found a stray were-coyote who became Scott and Stiles's pet-project. Literally. After they finally got her to change back came the harder part - domesticating. Derek daydreamed about sunshine, beaches and a nice girl, who for the sake of change wasn't a total psycho.
Long days followed each other. Malia's poor, sensitive ears were profoundly tested as Peter and Stiles viciously competed to show her the best bands and genres ever. Boyd made money enough for a Porsche at least and Derek gave his thanks to his foresight for choosing a building as HQ in an abandoned neighbourhood. Stiles was the worse by far - all that dubstep, rap, drum'n'bass (or whatever) and Lady Gaga especially would have brought even the most patient person to the brink of insanity.
Peter fought valiantly, that's for sure. He broke after one week, when Stiles - with a brilliant and devious move - changed his sacred Nirvana ringtone. To Katy Perry's Firework.
Lydia unfortunately chose that day to come by - she saw Stiles laughing, running in circles from a wolfed out Peter.
Derek just sighed.
The End