FIC: Christmas Casualties
Title: Christmas Casualties
Rating: PG13
Word Count: 3464
Pairing: Remus/Sirius
Warnings: Slash, a bit of bad language. Do I really need to mention it is unbeta'd - only Once in a Blue Moon ever gets checked.
Disclaimer: I own nothing that you recognise. J K Rowling retains all copyright.
Summary: Remus's first Christmas after leaving Hogwart's is going downhill...fast....and it's all thanks to Sirius Black.
A/N: I was going to post this next week when the holiday season is really underway. However I noticed the other day that today 30 November, is the first year anniversary of my posting the first chapter of my first Remus/Sirius slash fic. So, I decided to post this a little early in memory of that day, and because I don't have anything else to post instead.
Christmas Casualties
Casualty No. 1 - The Family Christmas
It was his first Christmas since leaving Hogwart’s and Remus had been looking forward to spending the holiday season with his family.
It wasn’t that he didn’t enjoy spending time with his friends, far from it. But James was spending Christmas with Lily and her family; Peter was spending the holidays with his own family and Sirius was…well, he didn’t actually know what Sirius was planning, but he was sure it was something exciting, and that he’d hear all about it in the New Year. Whatever it was he was planning, Remus was fairly sure he wasn’t part of the plans, and he was okay with that…most of the time.
He was quite content to pine over Sirius whilst spending the Christmas with his family. It was a shame that their plans didn’t quite mesh with his. The family Christmas was going to be a little difficult for him, what with his parents booking themselves a cruise on the Mediterranean for the holidays, a cruise that didn’t include his name on the passenger list.
Just because he’d decided to assert his independence and move out, they had assumed he wouldn’t be too upset at their plans.
Remus swore loudly as he slammed the door to his flat and shook the snow from his cloak.
“Language, Moony,” a familiar voice chided him.
Remus scowled across at Sirius. “How’d you get in here?” he asked. “I thought I’d put up the wards this morning.”
“You did,” Sirius replied easily as he pilfered through the fridge. “I just took them down. You really should use more than the textbook wards, you know. You got anything worth eating?”
Remus rolled his eyes and took off his cloak. “I was going to order takeout; I’ve not had time to shop.”
Sirius grinned and grabbed the takeout menus. “So, what have you got planned for the holidays?”
Casualty No. 2 - The Flat
As soon as Sirius had discovered that Remus had no firm plans for the holidays, he had taken it upon himself to ensure that this was immediately rectified.
“I wasn’t planning on putting up much,” Remus told Sirius for what seemed to be the hundredth time that day.
“But you’ve got to have a tree, and an advent calendar, and lights and…”
Remus tuned out the rest as Sirius began pulling various things from a tatty-looking box of muggle Christmas decorations. “Where did you get this lot anyway?”
“From a bloke at the market just across from Diagon Alley.”
“They look kind of old.”
“They’re antiques. It’s tradition and all that. Hey mistletoe! You can hang it over the fireplace - that way you get to snog everyone who floos in over the holidays.”
“Everyone apparates these days,” Remus pointed out, cursing himself a moment later when he recalled that one person didn’t. That same person having lost his licence, pending a re-test, after ‘accidentally’ apparating into the ladies’ changing rooms at Madam Malkin’s. “Sorry, I forgot.”
Sirius shrugged. “I’ll be apparating again by February, just not when I’m drunk.” He stood up and took the plastic mistletoe over to the fireplace, hanging it up with a quick sticking charm. “There you go. Perfect!”
Remus smiled as Sirius pulled some fairy lights from the box. Sirius was determined to decorate his flat, and he knew that it would be best if he simply left him to it. It was something he would come to regret later that night, when he smelt something smouldering and only escaped the burning flat by apparating out in his pyjamas.
Casualty No. 3 - Health
Sirius was thoroughly contrite about his part in the destruction of Remus’s flat and offered to repair the damage himself. Unfortunately, as Remus pointed out to him, the flat was part of a muggle block and there were already numerous muggle witnesses to the fire. Unless Sirius was able to track down each and every one and perform memory charms on them, there was little he could do except help with the flat hunting.
“You could always move in here,” Sirius suggested as Remus scoured the papers for a new place to rent. “Prongs will be moving in with Lily as soon as they find their own place, and I do feel kind of responsible for you being homeless.”
“Kind of responsible?” Remus queried with a smirk. “The report from the fire brigade blamed the faulty fairy lights that you bought.”
Sirius ducked his head sheepishly. “Sorry, Moony. I meant it though, you can stay here as long as you like.”
Remus tossed the newspaper aside and gave a casual shrug. “Okay, I’ll move in. Just promise me that you won’t decorate this place too.”
“We’ll decorate with magical decorations,” Sirius declared. “It’s far safer.”
-o-
Remus teetered on top of the stepladder and wondered yet again why he was hanging decorations the muggle way. “Why can’t we just float them up with a spell?” he asked.
“Because it’s not accurate enough,” Sirius replied from his position on the floor. “Left a bit more.”
Remus reached to his left and felt the stepladder wobble dangerously. “Here okay?”
“Just a bit more.”
“I can’t reach any farther,” Remus muttered. “Why don’t you climb up here and try?”
“I prefer it down here.”
“I’ll just bet you do. You’d never risk your neck climbing up here.”
“Actually, I just like it down here because I can check out your arse.”
“What?” Remus swung round, and in his shock he tumbled from the ladder. He fell awkwardly and heard a sickening crack.
“Remus!” Sirius rushed to his side. “I’m so sorry. Are you okay?”
Remus glared up at him. “Do I look okay?” he snapped. “You’d better floo a Healer. I think my leg’s broken.”
“I’m so sorry,” Sirius repeated, making no effort to move towards the fireplace.
“Don’t be sorry, just get a bloody Healer over here,” Remus told him, pointing at the fireplace for good measure. He tried not to think about Sirius’s words, after all, it was just the sort of thing Sirius was always saying to tease him.
Casualty No. 4 - Memory
Christmas at home seemed doomed to disaster and Sirius’s solution to this was to go out and get thoroughly smashed with the rest of the Christmas revellers.
The Leaky Cauldron the week before Christmas was crowded and noisy, with many Christmas shoppers stopping there for a quick pint on their way home.
“This is nice,” Sirius commented, passing Remus his third shot of firewhiskey.
“What was that?” Remus asked loudly, barely able to hear a word over the screaming of several children who were telling their parents just exactly what they wanted for Christmas. Remus privately hoped that their parents were as wealthy as the Malfoys, or there would be some very disappointed children on Christmas morning.
“I said this is nice,” Sirius repeated. “You know, just the two of us, hanging out, having a drink…getting to know each other better.”
Remus smiled and sipped at his drink. “You already know all my darkest secrets,” he reminded him.
Sirius took a long swallow of his own drink. “Doesn’t mean you know all of mine though.”
Remus eyed his friend curiously as he took another drink.
-o-
Remus thought his head was about to explode. What the hell had he been drinking last night?
Somewhere in the darkest recesses of his mind was a vague memory of sitting with Sirius in the Leaky Cauldron. Sirius had been talking about secrets and they’d been knocking back the firewhiskey like there was no tomorrow.
He had a definite memory of Sirius saying he had a secret and pretty much everything after that was a blank.
He couldn’t even remember making his way back to Sirius’s flat. Was he even in Sirius’s flat? There was only one way to find out, and Remus opened an eye, wincing at the bright morning sunlight.
He tried to sit up, but his head felt like it weighed a hundred pounds and there was some sort of dead weight lying across this chest.
He reached for the dead weight and felt soft fur under his fingers.
Twisting his head slightly he looked down enviously at the sleeping animagus.
What in the name of Merlin had happened last night?
-o-
Three poorly concocted hangover potions later and Remus still felt like crap.
Sirius on the other hand, claimed that becoming Padfoot after a night on the tiles was a perfect hangover cure, and was now cooking them breakfast.
“I can’t tell you how happy I am,” Sirius said as he piled fried eggs onto Remus’s plate.
“I don’t think I can eat all that,” Remus apologised, clutching his head gingerly.
“I’ve been trying to tell you for ages,” Sirius continued as he dished out the sausages, taking the slightly burnt ones for himself. “I didn’t dare hope that you were, too.”
Remus grabbed the pumpkin juice and took a slow drink from the carton. He caught Sirius watching him and flushed. “Sorry,” he offered, belatedly remembering that Sirius didn’t like people drinking straight from the carton.
“That’s okay. Nothing could upset me today.”
Sirius was entirely too cheerful and Remus was only half listening to him as he bustled about the kitchen.
Remus sat down at the table, watching Sirius as he carried the plates over to them. He had a feeling that he was missing something important, he just didn’t know what.
Sirius put Remus’s plate in front of him and leaned over to plant a quick kiss on his cheek.
Remus would have been shocked by the action, but the smell of the full English fry up was too much for his already abused stomach and he only just made it to the kitchen sink in time.
Then Sirius was holding his hair out of the way, soothingly rubbing his back and promising to whip up a decent hangover potion right away.
“Sirius,” Remus said quietly. “Just answer me one question.”
“Anything.”
“What the hell happened last night?”
“You don’t remember?”
“I remember being in the Leaky Cauldron, but not much else,” Remus admitted.
“Er…do you remember what we talked about?”
Remus frowned as he tried to dredge up a memory. “Something about you having secrets.”
“Do you remember what they were?”
Remus shook his head. “Did we mix elf-made wine with firewhiskey again?”
“Yeah, and we went to a muggle bar too.”
“We did?”
“You don’t remember it?”
Suddenly Remus had recalled a blue neon sign indicating a discreet entrance to an underground bar. “Was it in a cellar?”
“Yeah. Do you remember anything else?”
Remus recalled the smell of smoke but couldn’t tell if it was a memory of the bar or the lingering recollection of the fire at his flat. “Was there smoke?”
Sirius nodded. “On the dance floor.”
Remus groaned and buried his face in his hands. “Please tell me I didn’t try and dance?” he begged.
Sirius grinned. “You were very graceful.”
“I can’t believe you persuaded me to dance.”
“It was your idea,” Sirius told him. “Don’t you remember dancing?”
Remus shook his head, even as a vague memory of dancing glided through his mind.
Dancing…slowly and sleepily…in Sirius’s arms.
“I danced…with you?”
Sirius nodded. He was no longer grinning; instead he was chewing, almost nervously, on his lower lip.
Remus stumbled towards the sofa in the living area of the flat. “Promise me you’ll never let me get that drunk again,” he asked, closing his eyes and resting his head back.
Sirius didn’t answer and eventually Remus turned to look at him, only to find that he was alone in the flat.
“Bloody hell,” he swore. He’d danced with Sirius; what else had he done? No wonder Sirius was in such a great mood this morning, he had ammunition for teasing him right up until next Christmas now.
Casualty No. 5 - Remus’s Gringott’s Account
Sirius didn’t return for the rest of the day, though since Remus spent most of the day sleeping, he didn’t really notice the absence.
“Feeling better?” Sirius asked casually as he sat down in the chair opposite the sofa. Remus frowned, wondering why Sirius hadn’t taken his usual seat beside him on the sofa. “Remus? You okay?”
Remus nodded.
“Sorry about disappearing so suddenly earlier,” Sirius apologised. “I forgot I had an appointment this morning.”
“An appointment?”
Sirius waved his hand airily. “Nothing for you to worry about. So, Christmas Eve tomorrow…”
“Hmm?”
“Have you done all your Christmas shopping? Got my nice big present all sorted out?”
Remus snorted and threw a cushion across the room. “You know I always leave it until the last minute. It’s the only way I can make your present a surprise. If I buy it before tomorrow, you’ll find it and spoil the fun.”
Sirius affected a sulky pout and threw the cushion back.
“Sirius?”
“What?”
“What was the secret you told me last night?” Remus asked. “I’ve tried to remember, but I just can’t seem to manage it.”
Sirius looked away. “Doesn’t matter.”
“But you told me yesterday,” Remus pointed out.
Sirius shrugged. “Yesterday I had some good old fashioned courage to help me.”
Remus laughed. “You saying I need to get you drunk in order for you to spill the beans again?”
Sirius didn’t reply, and Remus was left to wonder just what his friend had confessed to him in the Leaky Cauldron.
-o-
Diagon Alley was crowded and Remus wished he’d been organised enough to do his shopping before the usual last minute rush. He could blame Sirius’s nosy nature and skill at finding his presents - he’d swear the mutt was part blood hound - but he knew that it was largely his own fault he left things until the eleventh hour every year.
He was looking in the window of the Owl Emporium when he felt that someone was watching him. Turning around he saw a young man looking at him from across the street. He didn’t recognise him, but as he caught his eye the young man moved towards him.
“Hi, Remus. Christmas shopping?” the young man said with a friendly smile.
Remus nodded. “Er…I don’t mean to be rude, but have we met?”
The young man blinked in surprise. “Night before last,” he replied. “Don’t you remember?”
Remus shook his head. “Afraid I don’t remember much about that night at all. Sorry.”
The young man laughed. “Yeah, you were pretty far gone. I’m Marcus, a friend of Sirius, from his Muggle Studies class. It was good seeing him again.”
“Wish I could remember any of it,” Remus muttered. “I’ve been trying to fill in the blanks ever since I woke up yesterday morning.”
“Well, I met up with the two of you just as you were leaving the Leaky Cauldron. We went to a muggle bar I’d heard about for a few hours. You and Sirius left before I did though. The last I saw of the two of you, you were discussing getting a port key to Switzerland for the holidays.”
“We were?”
“Yeah. Sirius was really enthusiastic about the idea, though he wanted you to sober up a bit before you went. He was a bit concerned about whether you might accidentally let go too soon and end up somewhere else entirely.”
“I can’t think what possessed me to want to go to Switzerland,” Remus said with a frown of confusion.
“Something about a romantic getaway for the holidays. You were going to try and persuade one of the port key agents to open up.”
Remus shook his head as several things registered in his mind. “Let me get this straight…I was planning a romantic holiday in Switzerland…with Sirius?”
“Yeah.”
“And Sirius liked the idea?”
“Why wouldn’t he?” Marcus asked with obvious confusion. “You two were pretty loved up all night.”
It would have been very convenient at this point if Remus had suddenly recalled all of the events of the night in question. Unfortunately, things were never that simple, and the only thing going through his mind right now was the thought that he had been so drunk he’d apparently completely blanked out his entire first date with the young man he’d been crazy about since sixth year.
The young man laughed. “They’re probably still open, if you hurry you might still manage it. Sirius was really looking forward to it.”
The young man waved him on as Remus ran across the road towards Port Keys to Paradise and hurriedly pushed through the door. “Switzerland,” he gasped out. “Reservations for two to Switzerland.”
The woman behind the desk nodded briskly. “There’s one next Tuesday from Yorkshire,” she offered.
“No, it has to be tonight.”
The woman gave an exasperated sigh, muttered something about irresponsible men who had forgotten to buy Christmas gifts, but did at least look again. “Can you get to Scotland in thirty minutes?”
Remus knew they’d be pushing it, but he nodded anyway. He’d just forget the fact that he had never taken anyone side-long as he apparated before.
The cost was prohibitive and he knew he’d have to cut back on things drastically after Christmas, but he’d apparently promised Sirius a romantic getaway for the holidays…and a romantic holiday break he would get.
Casualty No. 6 - Virginity
“Sirius!” Remus called as he stepped out of the fireplace of the flat.
“I’m in here!” Sirius called from the bedroom. “Don’t come in, I’m wrapping your present.”
“Get your things together, we’ve got to hurry,” Remus ordered, running into his own room and grabbing the few belongings he had that hadn’t been burnt to a cinder.
Sirius appeared in the doorway a moment later. “What are you doing?” he asked in confusion.
“Packing,” Remus replied. “Come on, hurry up. We’ve got to be eighteen miles outside of Edinburgh in twenty minutes.”
“Why?”
“We’ve got a port key to catch,” Remus told him. “Why aren’t you packing?”
“A port key?”
Remus rolled his eyes. “Yes, Sirius, a port key. You know, some useless looking object we use for transporting ourselves somewhere else…”
“I know what a port key is. Why in the world do we have to go catch one?”
“Because I’ve just bought us two reservations on a port key to Switzerland and it leaves in a little over fifteen minutes, from Scotland. So, hurry up and pack.”
“Switzerland?” Sirius whispered.
“Small country, middle of Europe, lots of snow and skiing.”
“But…?”
Remus grabbed his things and forcefully turned Sirius back towards his own room. “Go pack,” he ordered, slapping Sirius on the arse to get him moving.
Sirius spun round, his jaw dropping comically. “Did you just slap my arse?” he asked.
Remus smirked at him. “Yes, I did. And if you go and pack like I told you to, I’ll do a lot more to it later. Oh, and next year, I’m going to be the one watching you climbing up stepladders.”
“You meant what you said in the Leaky Cauldron?” Sirius asked. “When you didn’t remember, I thought you’d just said it because of the alcohol. Because of what I’d said.”
“I’ve no idea what I said, or what you said for that matter,” Remus admitted. “But I apparently promised you a romantic holiday, and I intend to keep my promise.”
“But…”
“Port key, fifteen minutes,” Remus reminded him.
Sirius finally hurried to pack his things.
-o-
They arrived at the cosy mountain lodge, high in the Swiss Alps, only to discover that Sirius had left Remus’s Christmas present at home. It seemed that leaving the country wasn’t enough to prevent them from messing things up.
“So,” Remus said as he sat down on the sofa in front of the roaring fire.
“So,” Sirius echoed, sitting down beside him.
“You want to go first?” Remus asked. “Or shall I?”
“How come you remember us talking about Switzerland?” Sirius asked.
“I didn’t. I bumped into Marcus in Diagon Alley.”
“Ah.”
“He told me that we were - how did he put it? - loved up.”
“You were drunk, we both were.”
And there was the out that Remus had been expecting. “I’m not drunk at the moment,” he said quietly.
Sirius looked at him out of the corner of his eye. “No, you’re not.”
Remus smirked in the firelight. “You…er…want to get loved up again?” he asked with a grin.
Sirius laughed as the tension that had been building disappeared with Remus’s words.
-o-
Later, Remus contemplated all the casualties of this particular Christmas, and all the things that he had lost. Then he looked at the dark-haired man lying in bed beside him and knew that the trade was worth it, and of all the things they had lost this Christmas, their mutual virginity’s were definitely the least missed.
Rating: PG13
Word Count: 3464
Pairing: Remus/Sirius
Warnings: Slash, a bit of bad language. Do I really need to mention it is unbeta'd - only Once in a Blue Moon ever gets checked.
Disclaimer: I own nothing that you recognise. J K Rowling retains all copyright.
Summary: Remus's first Christmas after leaving Hogwart's is going downhill...fast....and it's all thanks to Sirius Black.
A/N: I was going to post this next week when the holiday season is really underway. However I noticed the other day that today 30 November, is the first year anniversary of my posting the first chapter of my first Remus/Sirius slash fic. So, I decided to post this a little early in memory of that day, and because I don't have anything else to post instead.
Christmas Casualties
Casualty No. 1 - The Family Christmas
It was his first Christmas since leaving Hogwart’s and Remus had been looking forward to spending the holiday season with his family.
It wasn’t that he didn’t enjoy spending time with his friends, far from it. But James was spending Christmas with Lily and her family; Peter was spending the holidays with his own family and Sirius was…well, he didn’t actually know what Sirius was planning, but he was sure it was something exciting, and that he’d hear all about it in the New Year. Whatever it was he was planning, Remus was fairly sure he wasn’t part of the plans, and he was okay with that…most of the time.
He was quite content to pine over Sirius whilst spending the Christmas with his family. It was a shame that their plans didn’t quite mesh with his. The family Christmas was going to be a little difficult for him, what with his parents booking themselves a cruise on the Mediterranean for the holidays, a cruise that didn’t include his name on the passenger list.
Just because he’d decided to assert his independence and move out, they had assumed he wouldn’t be too upset at their plans.
Remus swore loudly as he slammed the door to his flat and shook the snow from his cloak.
“Language, Moony,” a familiar voice chided him.
Remus scowled across at Sirius. “How’d you get in here?” he asked. “I thought I’d put up the wards this morning.”
“You did,” Sirius replied easily as he pilfered through the fridge. “I just took them down. You really should use more than the textbook wards, you know. You got anything worth eating?”
Remus rolled his eyes and took off his cloak. “I was going to order takeout; I’ve not had time to shop.”
Sirius grinned and grabbed the takeout menus. “So, what have you got planned for the holidays?”
Casualty No. 2 - The Flat
As soon as Sirius had discovered that Remus had no firm plans for the holidays, he had taken it upon himself to ensure that this was immediately rectified.
“I wasn’t planning on putting up much,” Remus told Sirius for what seemed to be the hundredth time that day.
“But you’ve got to have a tree, and an advent calendar, and lights and…”
Remus tuned out the rest as Sirius began pulling various things from a tatty-looking box of muggle Christmas decorations. “Where did you get this lot anyway?”
“From a bloke at the market just across from Diagon Alley.”
“They look kind of old.”
“They’re antiques. It’s tradition and all that. Hey mistletoe! You can hang it over the fireplace - that way you get to snog everyone who floos in over the holidays.”
“Everyone apparates these days,” Remus pointed out, cursing himself a moment later when he recalled that one person didn’t. That same person having lost his licence, pending a re-test, after ‘accidentally’ apparating into the ladies’ changing rooms at Madam Malkin’s. “Sorry, I forgot.”
Sirius shrugged. “I’ll be apparating again by February, just not when I’m drunk.” He stood up and took the plastic mistletoe over to the fireplace, hanging it up with a quick sticking charm. “There you go. Perfect!”
Remus smiled as Sirius pulled some fairy lights from the box. Sirius was determined to decorate his flat, and he knew that it would be best if he simply left him to it. It was something he would come to regret later that night, when he smelt something smouldering and only escaped the burning flat by apparating out in his pyjamas.
Casualty No. 3 - Health
Sirius was thoroughly contrite about his part in the destruction of Remus’s flat and offered to repair the damage himself. Unfortunately, as Remus pointed out to him, the flat was part of a muggle block and there were already numerous muggle witnesses to the fire. Unless Sirius was able to track down each and every one and perform memory charms on them, there was little he could do except help with the flat hunting.
“You could always move in here,” Sirius suggested as Remus scoured the papers for a new place to rent. “Prongs will be moving in with Lily as soon as they find their own place, and I do feel kind of responsible for you being homeless.”
“Kind of responsible?” Remus queried with a smirk. “The report from the fire brigade blamed the faulty fairy lights that you bought.”
Sirius ducked his head sheepishly. “Sorry, Moony. I meant it though, you can stay here as long as you like.”
Remus tossed the newspaper aside and gave a casual shrug. “Okay, I’ll move in. Just promise me that you won’t decorate this place too.”
“We’ll decorate with magical decorations,” Sirius declared. “It’s far safer.”
-o-
Remus teetered on top of the stepladder and wondered yet again why he was hanging decorations the muggle way. “Why can’t we just float them up with a spell?” he asked.
“Because it’s not accurate enough,” Sirius replied from his position on the floor. “Left a bit more.”
Remus reached to his left and felt the stepladder wobble dangerously. “Here okay?”
“Just a bit more.”
“I can’t reach any farther,” Remus muttered. “Why don’t you climb up here and try?”
“I prefer it down here.”
“I’ll just bet you do. You’d never risk your neck climbing up here.”
“Actually, I just like it down here because I can check out your arse.”
“What?” Remus swung round, and in his shock he tumbled from the ladder. He fell awkwardly and heard a sickening crack.
“Remus!” Sirius rushed to his side. “I’m so sorry. Are you okay?”
Remus glared up at him. “Do I look okay?” he snapped. “You’d better floo a Healer. I think my leg’s broken.”
“I’m so sorry,” Sirius repeated, making no effort to move towards the fireplace.
“Don’t be sorry, just get a bloody Healer over here,” Remus told him, pointing at the fireplace for good measure. He tried not to think about Sirius’s words, after all, it was just the sort of thing Sirius was always saying to tease him.
Casualty No. 4 - Memory
Christmas at home seemed doomed to disaster and Sirius’s solution to this was to go out and get thoroughly smashed with the rest of the Christmas revellers.
The Leaky Cauldron the week before Christmas was crowded and noisy, with many Christmas shoppers stopping there for a quick pint on their way home.
“This is nice,” Sirius commented, passing Remus his third shot of firewhiskey.
“What was that?” Remus asked loudly, barely able to hear a word over the screaming of several children who were telling their parents just exactly what they wanted for Christmas. Remus privately hoped that their parents were as wealthy as the Malfoys, or there would be some very disappointed children on Christmas morning.
“I said this is nice,” Sirius repeated. “You know, just the two of us, hanging out, having a drink…getting to know each other better.”
Remus smiled and sipped at his drink. “You already know all my darkest secrets,” he reminded him.
Sirius took a long swallow of his own drink. “Doesn’t mean you know all of mine though.”
Remus eyed his friend curiously as he took another drink.
-o-
Remus thought his head was about to explode. What the hell had he been drinking last night?
Somewhere in the darkest recesses of his mind was a vague memory of sitting with Sirius in the Leaky Cauldron. Sirius had been talking about secrets and they’d been knocking back the firewhiskey like there was no tomorrow.
He had a definite memory of Sirius saying he had a secret and pretty much everything after that was a blank.
He couldn’t even remember making his way back to Sirius’s flat. Was he even in Sirius’s flat? There was only one way to find out, and Remus opened an eye, wincing at the bright morning sunlight.
He tried to sit up, but his head felt like it weighed a hundred pounds and there was some sort of dead weight lying across this chest.
He reached for the dead weight and felt soft fur under his fingers.
Twisting his head slightly he looked down enviously at the sleeping animagus.
What in the name of Merlin had happened last night?
-o-
Three poorly concocted hangover potions later and Remus still felt like crap.
Sirius on the other hand, claimed that becoming Padfoot after a night on the tiles was a perfect hangover cure, and was now cooking them breakfast.
“I can’t tell you how happy I am,” Sirius said as he piled fried eggs onto Remus’s plate.
“I don’t think I can eat all that,” Remus apologised, clutching his head gingerly.
“I’ve been trying to tell you for ages,” Sirius continued as he dished out the sausages, taking the slightly burnt ones for himself. “I didn’t dare hope that you were, too.”
Remus grabbed the pumpkin juice and took a slow drink from the carton. He caught Sirius watching him and flushed. “Sorry,” he offered, belatedly remembering that Sirius didn’t like people drinking straight from the carton.
“That’s okay. Nothing could upset me today.”
Sirius was entirely too cheerful and Remus was only half listening to him as he bustled about the kitchen.
Remus sat down at the table, watching Sirius as he carried the plates over to them. He had a feeling that he was missing something important, he just didn’t know what.
Sirius put Remus’s plate in front of him and leaned over to plant a quick kiss on his cheek.
Remus would have been shocked by the action, but the smell of the full English fry up was too much for his already abused stomach and he only just made it to the kitchen sink in time.
Then Sirius was holding his hair out of the way, soothingly rubbing his back and promising to whip up a decent hangover potion right away.
“Sirius,” Remus said quietly. “Just answer me one question.”
“Anything.”
“What the hell happened last night?”
“You don’t remember?”
“I remember being in the Leaky Cauldron, but not much else,” Remus admitted.
“Er…do you remember what we talked about?”
Remus frowned as he tried to dredge up a memory. “Something about you having secrets.”
“Do you remember what they were?”
Remus shook his head. “Did we mix elf-made wine with firewhiskey again?”
“Yeah, and we went to a muggle bar too.”
“We did?”
“You don’t remember it?”
Suddenly Remus had recalled a blue neon sign indicating a discreet entrance to an underground bar. “Was it in a cellar?”
“Yeah. Do you remember anything else?”
Remus recalled the smell of smoke but couldn’t tell if it was a memory of the bar or the lingering recollection of the fire at his flat. “Was there smoke?”
Sirius nodded. “On the dance floor.”
Remus groaned and buried his face in his hands. “Please tell me I didn’t try and dance?” he begged.
Sirius grinned. “You were very graceful.”
“I can’t believe you persuaded me to dance.”
“It was your idea,” Sirius told him. “Don’t you remember dancing?”
Remus shook his head, even as a vague memory of dancing glided through his mind.
Dancing…slowly and sleepily…in Sirius’s arms.
“I danced…with you?”
Sirius nodded. He was no longer grinning; instead he was chewing, almost nervously, on his lower lip.
Remus stumbled towards the sofa in the living area of the flat. “Promise me you’ll never let me get that drunk again,” he asked, closing his eyes and resting his head back.
Sirius didn’t answer and eventually Remus turned to look at him, only to find that he was alone in the flat.
“Bloody hell,” he swore. He’d danced with Sirius; what else had he done? No wonder Sirius was in such a great mood this morning, he had ammunition for teasing him right up until next Christmas now.
Casualty No. 5 - Remus’s Gringott’s Account
Sirius didn’t return for the rest of the day, though since Remus spent most of the day sleeping, he didn’t really notice the absence.
“Feeling better?” Sirius asked casually as he sat down in the chair opposite the sofa. Remus frowned, wondering why Sirius hadn’t taken his usual seat beside him on the sofa. “Remus? You okay?”
Remus nodded.
“Sorry about disappearing so suddenly earlier,” Sirius apologised. “I forgot I had an appointment this morning.”
“An appointment?”
Sirius waved his hand airily. “Nothing for you to worry about. So, Christmas Eve tomorrow…”
“Hmm?”
“Have you done all your Christmas shopping? Got my nice big present all sorted out?”
Remus snorted and threw a cushion across the room. “You know I always leave it until the last minute. It’s the only way I can make your present a surprise. If I buy it before tomorrow, you’ll find it and spoil the fun.”
Sirius affected a sulky pout and threw the cushion back.
“Sirius?”
“What?”
“What was the secret you told me last night?” Remus asked. “I’ve tried to remember, but I just can’t seem to manage it.”
Sirius looked away. “Doesn’t matter.”
“But you told me yesterday,” Remus pointed out.
Sirius shrugged. “Yesterday I had some good old fashioned courage to help me.”
Remus laughed. “You saying I need to get you drunk in order for you to spill the beans again?”
Sirius didn’t reply, and Remus was left to wonder just what his friend had confessed to him in the Leaky Cauldron.
-o-
Diagon Alley was crowded and Remus wished he’d been organised enough to do his shopping before the usual last minute rush. He could blame Sirius’s nosy nature and skill at finding his presents - he’d swear the mutt was part blood hound - but he knew that it was largely his own fault he left things until the eleventh hour every year.
He was looking in the window of the Owl Emporium when he felt that someone was watching him. Turning around he saw a young man looking at him from across the street. He didn’t recognise him, but as he caught his eye the young man moved towards him.
“Hi, Remus. Christmas shopping?” the young man said with a friendly smile.
Remus nodded. “Er…I don’t mean to be rude, but have we met?”
The young man blinked in surprise. “Night before last,” he replied. “Don’t you remember?”
Remus shook his head. “Afraid I don’t remember much about that night at all. Sorry.”
The young man laughed. “Yeah, you were pretty far gone. I’m Marcus, a friend of Sirius, from his Muggle Studies class. It was good seeing him again.”
“Wish I could remember any of it,” Remus muttered. “I’ve been trying to fill in the blanks ever since I woke up yesterday morning.”
“Well, I met up with the two of you just as you were leaving the Leaky Cauldron. We went to a muggle bar I’d heard about for a few hours. You and Sirius left before I did though. The last I saw of the two of you, you were discussing getting a port key to Switzerland for the holidays.”
“We were?”
“Yeah. Sirius was really enthusiastic about the idea, though he wanted you to sober up a bit before you went. He was a bit concerned about whether you might accidentally let go too soon and end up somewhere else entirely.”
“I can’t think what possessed me to want to go to Switzerland,” Remus said with a frown of confusion.
“Something about a romantic getaway for the holidays. You were going to try and persuade one of the port key agents to open up.”
Remus shook his head as several things registered in his mind. “Let me get this straight…I was planning a romantic holiday in Switzerland…with Sirius?”
“Yeah.”
“And Sirius liked the idea?”
“Why wouldn’t he?” Marcus asked with obvious confusion. “You two were pretty loved up all night.”
It would have been very convenient at this point if Remus had suddenly recalled all of the events of the night in question. Unfortunately, things were never that simple, and the only thing going through his mind right now was the thought that he had been so drunk he’d apparently completely blanked out his entire first date with the young man he’d been crazy about since sixth year.
The young man laughed. “They’re probably still open, if you hurry you might still manage it. Sirius was really looking forward to it.”
The young man waved him on as Remus ran across the road towards Port Keys to Paradise and hurriedly pushed through the door. “Switzerland,” he gasped out. “Reservations for two to Switzerland.”
The woman behind the desk nodded briskly. “There’s one next Tuesday from Yorkshire,” she offered.
“No, it has to be tonight.”
The woman gave an exasperated sigh, muttered something about irresponsible men who had forgotten to buy Christmas gifts, but did at least look again. “Can you get to Scotland in thirty minutes?”
Remus knew they’d be pushing it, but he nodded anyway. He’d just forget the fact that he had never taken anyone side-long as he apparated before.
The cost was prohibitive and he knew he’d have to cut back on things drastically after Christmas, but he’d apparently promised Sirius a romantic getaway for the holidays…and a romantic holiday break he would get.
Casualty No. 6 - Virginity
“Sirius!” Remus called as he stepped out of the fireplace of the flat.
“I’m in here!” Sirius called from the bedroom. “Don’t come in, I’m wrapping your present.”
“Get your things together, we’ve got to hurry,” Remus ordered, running into his own room and grabbing the few belongings he had that hadn’t been burnt to a cinder.
Sirius appeared in the doorway a moment later. “What are you doing?” he asked in confusion.
“Packing,” Remus replied. “Come on, hurry up. We’ve got to be eighteen miles outside of Edinburgh in twenty minutes.”
“Why?”
“We’ve got a port key to catch,” Remus told him. “Why aren’t you packing?”
“A port key?”
Remus rolled his eyes. “Yes, Sirius, a port key. You know, some useless looking object we use for transporting ourselves somewhere else…”
“I know what a port key is. Why in the world do we have to go catch one?”
“Because I’ve just bought us two reservations on a port key to Switzerland and it leaves in a little over fifteen minutes, from Scotland. So, hurry up and pack.”
“Switzerland?” Sirius whispered.
“Small country, middle of Europe, lots of snow and skiing.”
“But…?”
Remus grabbed his things and forcefully turned Sirius back towards his own room. “Go pack,” he ordered, slapping Sirius on the arse to get him moving.
Sirius spun round, his jaw dropping comically. “Did you just slap my arse?” he asked.
Remus smirked at him. “Yes, I did. And if you go and pack like I told you to, I’ll do a lot more to it later. Oh, and next year, I’m going to be the one watching you climbing up stepladders.”
“You meant what you said in the Leaky Cauldron?” Sirius asked. “When you didn’t remember, I thought you’d just said it because of the alcohol. Because of what I’d said.”
“I’ve no idea what I said, or what you said for that matter,” Remus admitted. “But I apparently promised you a romantic holiday, and I intend to keep my promise.”
“But…”
“Port key, fifteen minutes,” Remus reminded him.
Sirius finally hurried to pack his things.
-o-
They arrived at the cosy mountain lodge, high in the Swiss Alps, only to discover that Sirius had left Remus’s Christmas present at home. It seemed that leaving the country wasn’t enough to prevent them from messing things up.
“So,” Remus said as he sat down on the sofa in front of the roaring fire.
“So,” Sirius echoed, sitting down beside him.
“You want to go first?” Remus asked. “Or shall I?”
“How come you remember us talking about Switzerland?” Sirius asked.
“I didn’t. I bumped into Marcus in Diagon Alley.”
“Ah.”
“He told me that we were - how did he put it? - loved up.”
“You were drunk, we both were.”
And there was the out that Remus had been expecting. “I’m not drunk at the moment,” he said quietly.
Sirius looked at him out of the corner of his eye. “No, you’re not.”
Remus smirked in the firelight. “You…er…want to get loved up again?” he asked with a grin.
Sirius laughed as the tension that had been building disappeared with Remus’s words.
-o-
Later, Remus contemplated all the casualties of this particular Christmas, and all the things that he had lost. Then he looked at the dark-haired man lying in bed beside him and knew that the trade was worth it, and of all the things they had lost this Christmas, their mutual virginity’s were definitely the least missed.