FIC: Once in a Blue Moon - Ch 20 (WIP)
Start of the story, including summary, full ratings, warnings, pairings etc. Here
Disclaimer: I own nothing that you recognise. J K Rowling retains all copyright.
Tempt the Hand of Fate (PG)
By the time the sun set that evening Remus was desperate to speak with Romulus about what Professor McGonagall had said about the warrant of execution. It wasn’t that he thought the teacher was untruthful, he simply had to hear it from Romulus himself before he could believe it. Unfortunately the ghost, who had been an almost constant presence since his return, was nowhere to be seen.
“He can’t have gone far,” Peter pointed out reasonably.
“He’ll turn up when he wants to,” Sirius added. “Kind of like the way you do. I thought we’d agreed that you wouldn’t be coming to classes any more?”
“Things have changed since this morning,” Remus replied.
“Changed how? Spion decided to adopt you instead of turning you over to his mates at the Ministry?”
“Professor McGonagall said I could go to class,” Remus stated, glaring at the other boys, almost daring them to argue with him.
“You’ve been talking with McGonagall?”
“We had lunch together,” Remus added. “She said I could go to class as long as I’m careful.”
Sirius looked like he didn’t know what to say to that. “So, why are you so eager to talk to your brother all of a sudden?”
“I want to ask him something?
“Ask him what?”
“Just about something that McGonagall said.”
“Why? What else did she say?” James asked. “It’s something bad, isn’t it?”
“What is it?” Sirius asked. “You know you can tell me anything, right?”
Remus hesitated a little longer but eventually gave a sigh and sat down on Sirius’s bed. “She said that the Ministry will kill me if they catch me,” he finally whispered. “She said they have an execution warrant or something.”
“She’s probably lying,” James said reassuringly. “Wants to scare you into behaving whilst your hiding out here.”
“It’s working,” Remus answered with a snort. “I just wish I knew for sure if it’s true or not. Rom will know, but now I need to talk to him, I can’t find him anywhere.”
“It is true,” Sirius whispered. “They talked about it at Rom’s trial last summer.”
“They did?” Remus asked, equally quietly.
Sirius sat down beside Remus and put his arm around the smaller boy’s shoulders. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.”
“Rom always said that there was a possibility I might be killed, but I thought he meant that they might kill me by accident when they catch me. I didn’t think they would capture me and then kill me later. Not if I haven’t hurt anyone.”
Remus started to shake as he thought about what he had been told. Until now his worst nightmare had involved being sent to a camp for dangerous creatures. Now, all of a sudden, he had been told that instead of a life imprisoned, he would have no life at all.
“Don’t worry,” Sirius told him. “Dumbledore will sort it all out.”
“How?”
“I don’t know,” Sirius admitted. “I’m sure he has a plan though. He’ll just go to the Ministry and tell them they can’t kill you because Sirius Black doesn’t want to lose his best friend, and they won’t want to incur the wrath of the Black family.”
Remus chuckled slightly and shook his head. “You’re nuts,” he teased.
“Didn’t you know that already?” Sirius joked. “The whole Black family is totally crazy. Comes from all the inbreeding.”
“That your excuse, is it?” James asked.
Sirius grabbed a pillow from his bed and threw it at James, missing him completely but hitting Peter, who was unfortunately in the middle of drinking a glass of pumpkin juice. The juice spilled over James’s bed and James retaliated by tossing a pillow from his own bed towards Sirius.
In no time at all, all four boys were belting each other with pillows, two of which had burst, raining feathers all around the room.
In the midst of all this, Romulus appeared, shook his head briefly at the mess and settled down on one of the high window ledges to watch the chaos. Remus, unfortunately, was too caught up in the pillow fight to notice.
-o-xXx-o-
“What are you doing?” Sirius asked as he watched Remus turn back the covers on the spare bed in the dormitory later that night.
“Getting into bed,” Remus replied. “What’s it look like?”
“But you usually sleep here,” he pointed out, gesturing to the spot beside him, in his own bed.
“I just thought that since Professor McGonagall knows I’m here, and she’s told the house elves to bring me food…well, it seems silly not to use this bed, not if they know I’m here anyway.”
Sirius couldn’t argue with the logic of that and merely reminded Remus to make sure the bed curtains were closed, just in case they had an unexpected visitor.
It was strange, Sirius considered later that night. At first he had found it difficult to sleep with Remus lying next to him. But now, just a little over a month later, and he was having the opposite problem. Gryffindor Tower, always chilly and draughty in the winter months, seemed even more so without Remus’s warm presence curled up beside him.
The cold didn’t seem to be bothering James and Peter. The former was snoring loudly and the latter, who was apparently impervious to the cold, had even thrown off his blankets.
Sirius couldn’t tell whether Remus was awake or not, and he was reluctant to disturb the other boys by calling out across the room. He finally resorted to counting imps until he fell asleep.
Remus meanwhile, was still awake long after Sirius had fallen asleep, his eyes on the watchful ghost perched in the window. “Rom?” he whispered, peering through the gap in the bed curtains.
“What is it?” Rom whispered back, drifting down towards the bed.
“I can’t sleep.”
“Have you tried counting imps?”
“I’ve tried everything,” Remus muttered. “I just keep thinking about what Professor McGonagall and Sirius said about how the Ministry want to kill me.”
“Try not to worry about it too much. Just be careful.”
“Why does the Ministry hate me so much?” Remus whispered. “I’ve not done anything to them, and they don’t kill all werewolves. So, why do they want to kill me?”
Romulus looked away and Remus could tell he was hiding something from him.
“Rom? You didn’t know about the warrant before, did you?”
“Not exactly.”
“What do you mean by that?”
“I knew one had been asked for,” Romulus whispered, finally turning back to Remus. “I didn’t know they’d got one.”
“Who asked for it?” Remus asked with a frown. “Did I try to bite someone when I was first bitten? Is that why the Ministry wants to kill me?”
“No, Remus. You’ve never hurt anyone.”
“But someone thought I was too dangerous,” Remus pointed out.
“Just try and get some sleep. Don’t worry about it. Professor Dumbledore is working on a plan to help keep you safe.”
Remus lay back down and tried to force himself to fall asleep. “Rom?”
“Go to sleep Remus.”
“Was it Mum and Dad?” Remus whispered. “Was it them who asked the Ministry to…to…?”
Romulus was quiet for a long time before he finally replied. “I’m sorry, Rem.”
“Why didn’t they love me?” Remus asked.
“They did love you,” Romulus replied. “They loved both of us. They just got scared.”
“But you said that Dad was a Gryffindor. They’re supposed to be brave.”
“I know.”
“Do you think I’ll ever be safe?”
“You’re safe now,” Romulus replied. “Or as safe as you can be.”
“But, will I ever really be safe?”
“I don’t know. I wish I had all the answers, but no one does.”
Remus stared up at the ceiling, listening to the quiet and not so quiet snores from the other boys. All three boys in the room were Gryffindors, just like his Dad had been. Why was it they could be his friends, but his father didn’t even want him to live?
He heard the bed opposite his own creak as Sirius turned over in his sleep. Remus slipped out from under the covers and padded quietly across the room. “Sirius?” he whispered.
Sirius didn’t open his eyes or acknowledge him in any way.
“Sirius?” Remus tried again, this time poking him in the arm.
“Remus?” Sirius murmured sleepily. “What time is it?”
“I don’t know, it’s still dark.”
“What’s up?”
“I can’t sleep,” Remus replied, feeling rather silly for waking his friend for so trivial a thing.
“Have you tried counting imps?”
“Yes.”
“You want a drink of water or something?”
“No. I…”
“What?”
“I’m sorry for what I said about your family.”
“Doesn’t matter. It’s true, and Potter and Pettigrew have said a lot worse about them. Mostly true as well.”
“I still shouldn’t have said anything.”
“Forget it. Just try to get some sleep, you don’t want to fall asleep in class.”
“Do you mind if I…?” Remus’s voice trailed off as he gestured to the space beside Sirius.
Sirius smiled as he pulled back the covers. “’Course not.”
Remus smiled back and climbed under the blanket. “You’re all cold,” he complained.
Sirius chuckled quietly. “Go to sleep, Remus.”
Remus closed his eyes and snuggled under the blankets. “Goodnight Sirius,” he whispered, feeling safer now than he had all day.
“Goodnight,” Sirius replied, feeling warm at last.
-o-xXx-o-
“Weren’t you in that bed last night?” James asked Remus the next morning. He pointed to the spare bed, the curtains still drawn on two sides.
“Yeah,” Remus replied, yawning widely.
“Can’t sleep without each other, eh?” James teased, casting a glance towards Sirius, who was still dead to the world.
“You got it,” Remus said. “But, do us a favour and stop teasing Sirius about this sort of stuff.”
“But he’s so easy to wind up.” James laughed and began rummaging around in his wardrobe for a clean shirt, only to find they had all fallen to the floor.
“That’s because he’s worried about not fancying any of the girls here.”
“So what if he doesn’t? Neither does Peter. He even called Evans a shrew the other week.”
“Yeah, but you don’t tease Peter like you tease Sirius, do you? And Peter hasn’t had some silly gossip printed in the school newsletter by that nosy, little cow in Slytherin.”
“Sirius knows we’re just having a laugh with him,” James insisted, although he no longer sounded quite so sure of himself.
“Just leave it alone,” Remus asked quietly.
“Okay, I’ll not say another word. Though if I see the two of you snogging I reserve the right to tease you both as much as I want.”
“We’re not going to start snogging,” Remus replied with a laugh. “We’re just friends. Best friends.”
“Yeah, I’m best mates with Peter, but if he tried to get in bed with me, he’d find himself booted right back out again.”
“It’s different for me and Sirius though.”
“I can see that,” James smirked.
-o-xXx-o-
Remus loved being able to attend classes without having to worry about the teachers spotting him. He sometimes wondered how no one else seemed to know he was there, especially when Professor McGonagall chose to demonstrate the spells for her class on the desk he was sitting at. Or when Professor Sprout instinctively reached to pull him back from one of the more dangerous plants, that had reached out to grab him as they were leaving greenhouse three.
It seemed that plants and animals could either see or sense his presence and he was convinced that Professor McGonagall retained her cat-like abilities when she was in her human form. But, somehow, the other students remained oblivious to his presence, too wrapped up in their own lives and problems to notice the invisible boy who was joining them in class each day.
Every couple of weeks Remus found himself summoned via one of the house elves to visit Professor McGonagall’s office, where she proceeded to check he was putting on weight and regaining his health. Once a month Madam Pomfrey was in attendance as well, clucking over him like a mother hen and making sure that he knew she was always around to help him if he was seriously injured after one of the full moons.
On his birthday, he even found Professor Sprout in attendance, and for a moment had thought that he was going to be sent from the school. Instead he was pleasantly surprised to find that the head of Hufflepuff was a talented cook and had taken the trouble to bake him a proper birthday cake, complete with icing and candles.
He’d brought pieces of the cake back to the dormitory for the other boys, and endured so much teasing he threatened that the next time they could starve.
Sirius had brought him a jumbo box of sugar quills, though how he’d managed to buy them without Remus seeing was a mystery, and James and Peter had clubbed together to buy him various pranking items from Zonkos. Of course, the latter pair did have a somewhat ulterior motive for their present, pointing out that Remus was the best one to use the items since he was invisible most of the time.
All in all, Remus was pretty much convinced that it was the best birthday ever, and certainly a vast improvement on the last one.
“You’re thinking about last year, aren’t you?” Sirius asked quietly.
“Trying not to,” Remus muttered. He looked across the room towards Romulus.
“Sorry, no present from me this year,” Romulus apologised. “It’s a bit difficult with no money or anything.”
“It’s all right,” Remus replied. “It’s nice to have you here, even if I’d rather you were in Azkaban. How dumb does that sound? I’d rather my brother were locked up in prison, surrounded by dementors, than here with me on my birthday.”
“Now, what did we tell you this morning?” James scolded. “No miserable thoughts on your birthday. They’re not allowed.”
Remus forced a smile and picked up a sugar quill to eat.
“We’ve got something else for you as well,” James said, reaching inside his robes. “It’s not finished yet…”
“Because we got stuck,” Peter interrupted.
“But when it’s done it’ll be great.”
“What is it?” Remus asked.
“It’s a map of the school,” James explained. “It was Sirius’s idea. You know how much he worries about you.”
Remus watched as James unfolded the map and spread it out over the bedspread.
“What are all those little dots?” he asked.
“People moving about,” Sirius explained. He pointed to the third year boys’ dormitory. “These five dots are us.”
“Ghosts show up too?” Remus grinned. “Looks like you won’t be able to keep disappearing on me now,” he told Romulus.
“How can you tell who’s who?” Romulus asked curiously.
James sighed as he looked at the parchment. “Well, that’s one of the things we haven’t figured out yet. We need a way to label everyone.”
“And a way to make it disappear in case a teacher sees it,” Peter added.
“Naturally,” Romulus chuckled. “This is pretty good work though.”
“And once it’s working, we can see where Professor Spion, Rita Skeeter, Filch and anyone else who we want to avoid is at any time of the day,” Sirius explained.
“It’s great,” Remus exclaimed. “Really.”
“We’re calling it Moony’s Map,” James said proudly.
“Moony?” Remus whispered.
“Well, we didn’t think it’d be too sensible to call it Remus’s Map in case we got caught with it on us,” Peter pointed out.
“Moony is still you though.”
“Moony’s the wolf,” Remus muttered. “It’s…”
“We know that,” James interrupted. “We can change it if you don’t like it.”
Remus considered it for a moment, before shaking his head. “No, it’s okay,” he replied. “Moony’s Map sounds fine.”
“So, any ideas on how to hide it and how to label everyone?” Peter asked. “We’re all out of ideas, and we’ve figured out by now that you’re the real brains of the dorm.”
“I might have an idea or two,” Remus replied thoughtfully, tapping his lower lip with the sugar quill.
-o-xXx-o-
Moony’s Map, as it had been named, was not as easy to finish as Remus had initially hoped. It seemed that no sooner had one problem been solved than another cropped up.
Two days after starting work on it, the problem of getting the map to disappear was solved. Unfortunately a side effect of that meant that the staircases were no longer moving. Then once the staircases problem was fixed, the dots (still unlabeled) vanished from the map.
There was also a problem with a persistent blot of ink that insisted on marring the parchment whenever the map was hidden.
In short, it was plain frustrating and Remus was about to start tearing his hair out.
“Why not take a break?” Sirius suggested. “Look at it again in a week or two?”
“But I’m so close,” Remus whined. “I just know that the answer is right there, I just can’t see it.”
“You’re probably just trying too hard.”
“Maybe.”
“Tell you what, how about we go down to the Quidditch pitch for a bit? Spion’s not here this week, off on important Ministry business or some such rot. You can have your first flying lesson without worrying about being seen.”
“Really?” Remus asked, the temptation too much to resist.
“Remus,” Romulus warned.
“It’ll just be for a little while,” Remus replied, already making his way towards the door.
“What if Spion comes back early?”
“Just for an hour,” whined Remus, his hand on the door handle.
“This is a bad idea.”
“I’ll look after him,” Sirius promised. “He’ll come back here all in one piece. I won’t even use the bludgers.”
“One hour,” Romulus conceded. “Then I’m coming down to get you myself.”
“Thanks Rom,” Remus called, disappearing under the invisibility cloak and out of the door, Sirius close at his heels.
James was already down on the Quidditch pitch, putting in some extra training under the stern eye of Charlene, who looked like she would have no hesitation in sending a dozen bludgers in his direction.
“Hi, Sirius,” James called from the air, aiming the quaffle at the hoops, but missing by several feet.
“Ruddy useless,” Charlene screeched at him.
“Yeah, yeah,” James replied, coming in to land and waving absently back up at her. “You’d think she was Captain the way she harps on, wouldn’t you?”
Sirius laughed and shook his head in amusement as James pulled off his gloves and walked over. “Thought you’d still be in the dorm with you-know-who,” he commented with a conspirator’s wink.
“Thought we’d come down here and give him his first flying lesson,” Sirius replied. “Didn’t know you’d be out here though.”
“We’re just done,” James told him. “It’s all yours.”
“Thanks.”
Sirius sat down on the bench and waited a few minutes until James and Charlene had disappeared back up to the school. “Remus?” he hissed, even though no one was near enough to hear him.
“Right here,” Remus replied, pulling off the cloak.
“So, are you ready for your first flying lesson?”
“Ready as I’ll ever be.”
“Then let us begin,” Sirius announced in his most professor-like voice as he led the way towards the store cupboard for the school brooms at the back of the stands.
Remus, it turned out, was a natural in the air. With a fearlessness that rivalled James, he was soon tearing around the pitch at a speed that was making Sirius dizzy.
“Wow!” Remus called. “I can even see my house from up here.”
Sirius turned his broom skyward and joined Remus. He soon realised that he could indeed see the small house at the edge of Hogsmeade. Although it was some distance away Sirius fancied that the garden looked rather more unkempt than it had been when the Lupins were in residence. On the one hand it was sad to see it so neglected, on the other, at least it meant that no one was living there, and that one day it could be Remus’s home again.
“I miss being at home,” Remus admitted quietly. “I used to hate it there, and wanted, more than anything, to be here at Hogwarts, but not like this.”
“I know.”
“It’s not that I don’t like being here in the school. I just hate hiding like this. It sounds stupid, but I really want to raise my hand in class when I know the answer to a question.”
Sirius, who rarely bothered to raise his hand, even if he did know the answer, laughed at that. “You do know you’re a freak, right?”
Remus nearly fell from his broom, stunned at the comment.
“I meant about raising your hand in class,” Sirius clarified when he realised how Remus had interpreted his offhand remark. “I’d never call you over that.”
“But I am a freak,” Remus whispered, looking away from Sirius and back towards Hogsmeade. “If I wasn’t, I’d be here at the school properly, wouldn’t I?”
“You will be, one day…”
“When I’m about to retire?” Remus snorted and turned his gaze back to the castle. “I just want to be normal. Is that too much to ask?”
“No,” Sirius whispered.
“I guess we should be heading back inside,” Remus commented as he continued to look at the school. “Wouldn’t want Rom getting all panicked, would we?”
Sirius nodded and dipped the nose of his broom so that he descended steadily to the ground. Remus, in a final moment of recklessness, chose the faster descent and nose-dived towards the ground, pulling up at the very last second to come to an abrupt halt.
“We’ve got to do this again!” Remus exclaimed as Sirius took his broom to put it away.
“If Spion goes away again,” Sirius promised, and they walked back up to the school, Remus once again hidden by the invisibility cloak.
-o-xXx-o-
“Really, Remus.” Professor McGonagall sighed and shook her head in exasperation. “What if someone besides me had seen you out there on the Quidditch pitch? What if you’d been recognised?”
“It was only for a little while,” Remus argued. “Barely even an hour.”
“It would only take a moment for someone to recognise that you aren’t one of the students, even if you are wearing your friend’s clothes.” McGonagall looked him up and down, shaking her head again as she saw the slightly too long sleeves and turned up trousers. She pulled out her wand and pointed it firstly at the shirt, then the trousers, magically adjusting the lengths. “I’ll see about getting you some of your own things from Hogsmeade,” she suggested kindly.
“I think I’ve grown out of them all,” Remus admitted.
“In which case, I think a trip to the lost property office would be in order. You’d be surprised how many items of clothing the students of this school misplace during the course of a year. There must be hundreds of items that have been here for years. I’ll bet I can ever find some of your brother’s old things in there if I looked long enough. According to Professor Sprout he was always losing his belongings.”
“Professor?” Remus asked quietly.
“Yes?”
“I was wondering…”
“Yes?”
“I…will…do you think I’ll ever be able to….?”
“Come to Hogwarts properly?” McGonagall guessed.
Remus nodded and rubbed at his nose in embarrassment.
“I’m afraid I can’t say for sure whether you’ll be able to join your friends here,” McGonagall explained. “I’m afraid it’s a little complicated.”
“Everyone keeps saying that!” Remus snapped impatiently. “It’s complicated, you wouldn’t understand, I’ll explain when you’re older…if you don’t want me being with the other kids, why don’t you just say so?”
“Oh, that’s not it at all, dear,” McGonagall hurriedly assured him, patting him on the shoulder in a calming manner. “I’d like nothing better than for you to be sorted into Gryffindor, though I think Professor Sprout might fight me for you to be in Hufflepuff with her instead.”
“Really?” Remus asked hopefully.
“Really.” McGonagall nodded firmly. “But until this whole mess with the Ministry is sorted out, it’s just impossible.”
“Maybe it would be better for me to give myself up?” Remus suggested. “Get it over with, and then I can come here.”
“I’m afraid that would be impossible.”
“Why not?”
“Because at the moment your legal guardians are still your parents, and unless another family member - an adult - is prepared to take responsibility for you, their decision as to your welfare stands.”
“And they want me dead,” Remus whispered. “Why can’t I just go and live with one of my other relatives? Rom said that Mum had a sister, Aunt Rosina, Rosina White or Wilson or something beginning with W. She works in St Mungo’s, I think.”
“Professor Dumbledore is looking into that at the moment.”
“He is?”
“After your brother was sent to Azkaban, Professor Dumbledore spoke with your parents to try to persuade them to… Well, they wouldn’t listen and so the headmaster has been tracking down all of your relatives to see if he can find one of them who will take responsibility for your upbringing and welfare.”
“Are they difficult to find?” Remus asked with a frown.
“Some are, but the main problem seems to be finding someone who…” Professor McGonagall’s voice trailed off as though she realised that she had said too much. Remus however knew exactly what the unspoken words were.
“Someone who wants me,” he finished quietly.
“I shouldn’t have said so much,” McGonagall scolded herself. “Remus, there are many families out there who would love to have you live with them. It’s just…”
“Complicated?” Remus guessed with a weak smile. “What if Professor Dumbledore asks all my family and none of them want me?”
“Then he’ll find another way to help you,” McGonagall promised. “There’s a law being debated by the Wizengamot which may help.”
“A law?”
“Yes. But it’s taking a long time to be passed. When it does I’m sure Professor Dumbledore will ensure you are one of the first to benefit from it. At least, if he hasn’t found a family member to resume custody of you in the meantime.”
Remus looked at Professor McGonagall and shifted nervously in his seat. “Professor?”
“Yes?”
“Do you think I’d be sorted into Gryffindor?” Remus asked, chewing on his lip as he waited for an answer.
“I’m sure you’d be an asset to the house,” McGonagall replied. “Now, you’d better run along or your friends will be missing you.”
Remus nodded and pulled the invisibility cloak back on. “Thanks, Professor,” he said as he opened the door and crept back through the corridors towards Gryffindor Tower.
Chapter 21
Disclaimer: I own nothing that you recognise. J K Rowling retains all copyright.
Tempt the Hand of Fate (PG)
By the time the sun set that evening Remus was desperate to speak with Romulus about what Professor McGonagall had said about the warrant of execution. It wasn’t that he thought the teacher was untruthful, he simply had to hear it from Romulus himself before he could believe it. Unfortunately the ghost, who had been an almost constant presence since his return, was nowhere to be seen.
“He can’t have gone far,” Peter pointed out reasonably.
“He’ll turn up when he wants to,” Sirius added. “Kind of like the way you do. I thought we’d agreed that you wouldn’t be coming to classes any more?”
“Things have changed since this morning,” Remus replied.
“Changed how? Spion decided to adopt you instead of turning you over to his mates at the Ministry?”
“Professor McGonagall said I could go to class,” Remus stated, glaring at the other boys, almost daring them to argue with him.
“You’ve been talking with McGonagall?”
“We had lunch together,” Remus added. “She said I could go to class as long as I’m careful.”
Sirius looked like he didn’t know what to say to that. “So, why are you so eager to talk to your brother all of a sudden?”
“I want to ask him something?
“Ask him what?”
“Just about something that McGonagall said.”
“Why? What else did she say?” James asked. “It’s something bad, isn’t it?”
“What is it?” Sirius asked. “You know you can tell me anything, right?”
Remus hesitated a little longer but eventually gave a sigh and sat down on Sirius’s bed. “She said that the Ministry will kill me if they catch me,” he finally whispered. “She said they have an execution warrant or something.”
“She’s probably lying,” James said reassuringly. “Wants to scare you into behaving whilst your hiding out here.”
“It’s working,” Remus answered with a snort. “I just wish I knew for sure if it’s true or not. Rom will know, but now I need to talk to him, I can’t find him anywhere.”
“It is true,” Sirius whispered. “They talked about it at Rom’s trial last summer.”
“They did?” Remus asked, equally quietly.
Sirius sat down beside Remus and put his arm around the smaller boy’s shoulders. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.”
“Rom always said that there was a possibility I might be killed, but I thought he meant that they might kill me by accident when they catch me. I didn’t think they would capture me and then kill me later. Not if I haven’t hurt anyone.”
Remus started to shake as he thought about what he had been told. Until now his worst nightmare had involved being sent to a camp for dangerous creatures. Now, all of a sudden, he had been told that instead of a life imprisoned, he would have no life at all.
“Don’t worry,” Sirius told him. “Dumbledore will sort it all out.”
“How?”
“I don’t know,” Sirius admitted. “I’m sure he has a plan though. He’ll just go to the Ministry and tell them they can’t kill you because Sirius Black doesn’t want to lose his best friend, and they won’t want to incur the wrath of the Black family.”
Remus chuckled slightly and shook his head. “You’re nuts,” he teased.
“Didn’t you know that already?” Sirius joked. “The whole Black family is totally crazy. Comes from all the inbreeding.”
“That your excuse, is it?” James asked.
Sirius grabbed a pillow from his bed and threw it at James, missing him completely but hitting Peter, who was unfortunately in the middle of drinking a glass of pumpkin juice. The juice spilled over James’s bed and James retaliated by tossing a pillow from his own bed towards Sirius.
In no time at all, all four boys were belting each other with pillows, two of which had burst, raining feathers all around the room.
In the midst of all this, Romulus appeared, shook his head briefly at the mess and settled down on one of the high window ledges to watch the chaos. Remus, unfortunately, was too caught up in the pillow fight to notice.
-o-xXx-o-
“What are you doing?” Sirius asked as he watched Remus turn back the covers on the spare bed in the dormitory later that night.
“Getting into bed,” Remus replied. “What’s it look like?”
“But you usually sleep here,” he pointed out, gesturing to the spot beside him, in his own bed.
“I just thought that since Professor McGonagall knows I’m here, and she’s told the house elves to bring me food…well, it seems silly not to use this bed, not if they know I’m here anyway.”
Sirius couldn’t argue with the logic of that and merely reminded Remus to make sure the bed curtains were closed, just in case they had an unexpected visitor.
It was strange, Sirius considered later that night. At first he had found it difficult to sleep with Remus lying next to him. But now, just a little over a month later, and he was having the opposite problem. Gryffindor Tower, always chilly and draughty in the winter months, seemed even more so without Remus’s warm presence curled up beside him.
The cold didn’t seem to be bothering James and Peter. The former was snoring loudly and the latter, who was apparently impervious to the cold, had even thrown off his blankets.
Sirius couldn’t tell whether Remus was awake or not, and he was reluctant to disturb the other boys by calling out across the room. He finally resorted to counting imps until he fell asleep.
Remus meanwhile, was still awake long after Sirius had fallen asleep, his eyes on the watchful ghost perched in the window. “Rom?” he whispered, peering through the gap in the bed curtains.
“What is it?” Rom whispered back, drifting down towards the bed.
“I can’t sleep.”
“Have you tried counting imps?”
“I’ve tried everything,” Remus muttered. “I just keep thinking about what Professor McGonagall and Sirius said about how the Ministry want to kill me.”
“Try not to worry about it too much. Just be careful.”
“Why does the Ministry hate me so much?” Remus whispered. “I’ve not done anything to them, and they don’t kill all werewolves. So, why do they want to kill me?”
Romulus looked away and Remus could tell he was hiding something from him.
“Rom? You didn’t know about the warrant before, did you?”
“Not exactly.”
“What do you mean by that?”
“I knew one had been asked for,” Romulus whispered, finally turning back to Remus. “I didn’t know they’d got one.”
“Who asked for it?” Remus asked with a frown. “Did I try to bite someone when I was first bitten? Is that why the Ministry wants to kill me?”
“No, Remus. You’ve never hurt anyone.”
“But someone thought I was too dangerous,” Remus pointed out.
“Just try and get some sleep. Don’t worry about it. Professor Dumbledore is working on a plan to help keep you safe.”
Remus lay back down and tried to force himself to fall asleep. “Rom?”
“Go to sleep Remus.”
“Was it Mum and Dad?” Remus whispered. “Was it them who asked the Ministry to…to…?”
Romulus was quiet for a long time before he finally replied. “I’m sorry, Rem.”
“Why didn’t they love me?” Remus asked.
“They did love you,” Romulus replied. “They loved both of us. They just got scared.”
“But you said that Dad was a Gryffindor. They’re supposed to be brave.”
“I know.”
“Do you think I’ll ever be safe?”
“You’re safe now,” Romulus replied. “Or as safe as you can be.”
“But, will I ever really be safe?”
“I don’t know. I wish I had all the answers, but no one does.”
Remus stared up at the ceiling, listening to the quiet and not so quiet snores from the other boys. All three boys in the room were Gryffindors, just like his Dad had been. Why was it they could be his friends, but his father didn’t even want him to live?
He heard the bed opposite his own creak as Sirius turned over in his sleep. Remus slipped out from under the covers and padded quietly across the room. “Sirius?” he whispered.
Sirius didn’t open his eyes or acknowledge him in any way.
“Sirius?” Remus tried again, this time poking him in the arm.
“Remus?” Sirius murmured sleepily. “What time is it?”
“I don’t know, it’s still dark.”
“What’s up?”
“I can’t sleep,” Remus replied, feeling rather silly for waking his friend for so trivial a thing.
“Have you tried counting imps?”
“Yes.”
“You want a drink of water or something?”
“No. I…”
“What?”
“I’m sorry for what I said about your family.”
“Doesn’t matter. It’s true, and Potter and Pettigrew have said a lot worse about them. Mostly true as well.”
“I still shouldn’t have said anything.”
“Forget it. Just try to get some sleep, you don’t want to fall asleep in class.”
“Do you mind if I…?” Remus’s voice trailed off as he gestured to the space beside Sirius.
Sirius smiled as he pulled back the covers. “’Course not.”
Remus smiled back and climbed under the blanket. “You’re all cold,” he complained.
Sirius chuckled quietly. “Go to sleep, Remus.”
Remus closed his eyes and snuggled under the blankets. “Goodnight Sirius,” he whispered, feeling safer now than he had all day.
“Goodnight,” Sirius replied, feeling warm at last.
-o-xXx-o-
“Weren’t you in that bed last night?” James asked Remus the next morning. He pointed to the spare bed, the curtains still drawn on two sides.
“Yeah,” Remus replied, yawning widely.
“Can’t sleep without each other, eh?” James teased, casting a glance towards Sirius, who was still dead to the world.
“You got it,” Remus said. “But, do us a favour and stop teasing Sirius about this sort of stuff.”
“But he’s so easy to wind up.” James laughed and began rummaging around in his wardrobe for a clean shirt, only to find they had all fallen to the floor.
“That’s because he’s worried about not fancying any of the girls here.”
“So what if he doesn’t? Neither does Peter. He even called Evans a shrew the other week.”
“Yeah, but you don’t tease Peter like you tease Sirius, do you? And Peter hasn’t had some silly gossip printed in the school newsletter by that nosy, little cow in Slytherin.”
“Sirius knows we’re just having a laugh with him,” James insisted, although he no longer sounded quite so sure of himself.
“Just leave it alone,” Remus asked quietly.
“Okay, I’ll not say another word. Though if I see the two of you snogging I reserve the right to tease you both as much as I want.”
“We’re not going to start snogging,” Remus replied with a laugh. “We’re just friends. Best friends.”
“Yeah, I’m best mates with Peter, but if he tried to get in bed with me, he’d find himself booted right back out again.”
“It’s different for me and Sirius though.”
“I can see that,” James smirked.
-o-xXx-o-
Remus loved being able to attend classes without having to worry about the teachers spotting him. He sometimes wondered how no one else seemed to know he was there, especially when Professor McGonagall chose to demonstrate the spells for her class on the desk he was sitting at. Or when Professor Sprout instinctively reached to pull him back from one of the more dangerous plants, that had reached out to grab him as they were leaving greenhouse three.
It seemed that plants and animals could either see or sense his presence and he was convinced that Professor McGonagall retained her cat-like abilities when she was in her human form. But, somehow, the other students remained oblivious to his presence, too wrapped up in their own lives and problems to notice the invisible boy who was joining them in class each day.
Every couple of weeks Remus found himself summoned via one of the house elves to visit Professor McGonagall’s office, where she proceeded to check he was putting on weight and regaining his health. Once a month Madam Pomfrey was in attendance as well, clucking over him like a mother hen and making sure that he knew she was always around to help him if he was seriously injured after one of the full moons.
On his birthday, he even found Professor Sprout in attendance, and for a moment had thought that he was going to be sent from the school. Instead he was pleasantly surprised to find that the head of Hufflepuff was a talented cook and had taken the trouble to bake him a proper birthday cake, complete with icing and candles.
He’d brought pieces of the cake back to the dormitory for the other boys, and endured so much teasing he threatened that the next time they could starve.
Sirius had brought him a jumbo box of sugar quills, though how he’d managed to buy them without Remus seeing was a mystery, and James and Peter had clubbed together to buy him various pranking items from Zonkos. Of course, the latter pair did have a somewhat ulterior motive for their present, pointing out that Remus was the best one to use the items since he was invisible most of the time.
All in all, Remus was pretty much convinced that it was the best birthday ever, and certainly a vast improvement on the last one.
“You’re thinking about last year, aren’t you?” Sirius asked quietly.
“Trying not to,” Remus muttered. He looked across the room towards Romulus.
“Sorry, no present from me this year,” Romulus apologised. “It’s a bit difficult with no money or anything.”
“It’s all right,” Remus replied. “It’s nice to have you here, even if I’d rather you were in Azkaban. How dumb does that sound? I’d rather my brother were locked up in prison, surrounded by dementors, than here with me on my birthday.”
“Now, what did we tell you this morning?” James scolded. “No miserable thoughts on your birthday. They’re not allowed.”
Remus forced a smile and picked up a sugar quill to eat.
“We’ve got something else for you as well,” James said, reaching inside his robes. “It’s not finished yet…”
“Because we got stuck,” Peter interrupted.
“But when it’s done it’ll be great.”
“What is it?” Remus asked.
“It’s a map of the school,” James explained. “It was Sirius’s idea. You know how much he worries about you.”
Remus watched as James unfolded the map and spread it out over the bedspread.
“What are all those little dots?” he asked.
“People moving about,” Sirius explained. He pointed to the third year boys’ dormitory. “These five dots are us.”
“Ghosts show up too?” Remus grinned. “Looks like you won’t be able to keep disappearing on me now,” he told Romulus.
“How can you tell who’s who?” Romulus asked curiously.
James sighed as he looked at the parchment. “Well, that’s one of the things we haven’t figured out yet. We need a way to label everyone.”
“And a way to make it disappear in case a teacher sees it,” Peter added.
“Naturally,” Romulus chuckled. “This is pretty good work though.”
“And once it’s working, we can see where Professor Spion, Rita Skeeter, Filch and anyone else who we want to avoid is at any time of the day,” Sirius explained.
“It’s great,” Remus exclaimed. “Really.”
“We’re calling it Moony’s Map,” James said proudly.
“Moony?” Remus whispered.
“Well, we didn’t think it’d be too sensible to call it Remus’s Map in case we got caught with it on us,” Peter pointed out.
“Moony is still you though.”
“Moony’s the wolf,” Remus muttered. “It’s…”
“We know that,” James interrupted. “We can change it if you don’t like it.”
Remus considered it for a moment, before shaking his head. “No, it’s okay,” he replied. “Moony’s Map sounds fine.”
“So, any ideas on how to hide it and how to label everyone?” Peter asked. “We’re all out of ideas, and we’ve figured out by now that you’re the real brains of the dorm.”
“I might have an idea or two,” Remus replied thoughtfully, tapping his lower lip with the sugar quill.
-o-xXx-o-
Moony’s Map, as it had been named, was not as easy to finish as Remus had initially hoped. It seemed that no sooner had one problem been solved than another cropped up.
Two days after starting work on it, the problem of getting the map to disappear was solved. Unfortunately a side effect of that meant that the staircases were no longer moving. Then once the staircases problem was fixed, the dots (still unlabeled) vanished from the map.
There was also a problem with a persistent blot of ink that insisted on marring the parchment whenever the map was hidden.
In short, it was plain frustrating and Remus was about to start tearing his hair out.
“Why not take a break?” Sirius suggested. “Look at it again in a week or two?”
“But I’m so close,” Remus whined. “I just know that the answer is right there, I just can’t see it.”
“You’re probably just trying too hard.”
“Maybe.”
“Tell you what, how about we go down to the Quidditch pitch for a bit? Spion’s not here this week, off on important Ministry business or some such rot. You can have your first flying lesson without worrying about being seen.”
“Really?” Remus asked, the temptation too much to resist.
“Remus,” Romulus warned.
“It’ll just be for a little while,” Remus replied, already making his way towards the door.
“What if Spion comes back early?”
“Just for an hour,” whined Remus, his hand on the door handle.
“This is a bad idea.”
“I’ll look after him,” Sirius promised. “He’ll come back here all in one piece. I won’t even use the bludgers.”
“One hour,” Romulus conceded. “Then I’m coming down to get you myself.”
“Thanks Rom,” Remus called, disappearing under the invisibility cloak and out of the door, Sirius close at his heels.
James was already down on the Quidditch pitch, putting in some extra training under the stern eye of Charlene, who looked like she would have no hesitation in sending a dozen bludgers in his direction.
“Hi, Sirius,” James called from the air, aiming the quaffle at the hoops, but missing by several feet.
“Ruddy useless,” Charlene screeched at him.
“Yeah, yeah,” James replied, coming in to land and waving absently back up at her. “You’d think she was Captain the way she harps on, wouldn’t you?”
Sirius laughed and shook his head in amusement as James pulled off his gloves and walked over. “Thought you’d still be in the dorm with you-know-who,” he commented with a conspirator’s wink.
“Thought we’d come down here and give him his first flying lesson,” Sirius replied. “Didn’t know you’d be out here though.”
“We’re just done,” James told him. “It’s all yours.”
“Thanks.”
Sirius sat down on the bench and waited a few minutes until James and Charlene had disappeared back up to the school. “Remus?” he hissed, even though no one was near enough to hear him.
“Right here,” Remus replied, pulling off the cloak.
“So, are you ready for your first flying lesson?”
“Ready as I’ll ever be.”
“Then let us begin,” Sirius announced in his most professor-like voice as he led the way towards the store cupboard for the school brooms at the back of the stands.
Remus, it turned out, was a natural in the air. With a fearlessness that rivalled James, he was soon tearing around the pitch at a speed that was making Sirius dizzy.
“Wow!” Remus called. “I can even see my house from up here.”
Sirius turned his broom skyward and joined Remus. He soon realised that he could indeed see the small house at the edge of Hogsmeade. Although it was some distance away Sirius fancied that the garden looked rather more unkempt than it had been when the Lupins were in residence. On the one hand it was sad to see it so neglected, on the other, at least it meant that no one was living there, and that one day it could be Remus’s home again.
“I miss being at home,” Remus admitted quietly. “I used to hate it there, and wanted, more than anything, to be here at Hogwarts, but not like this.”
“I know.”
“It’s not that I don’t like being here in the school. I just hate hiding like this. It sounds stupid, but I really want to raise my hand in class when I know the answer to a question.”
Sirius, who rarely bothered to raise his hand, even if he did know the answer, laughed at that. “You do know you’re a freak, right?”
Remus nearly fell from his broom, stunned at the comment.
“I meant about raising your hand in class,” Sirius clarified when he realised how Remus had interpreted his offhand remark. “I’d never call you over that.”
“But I am a freak,” Remus whispered, looking away from Sirius and back towards Hogsmeade. “If I wasn’t, I’d be here at the school properly, wouldn’t I?”
“You will be, one day…”
“When I’m about to retire?” Remus snorted and turned his gaze back to the castle. “I just want to be normal. Is that too much to ask?”
“No,” Sirius whispered.
“I guess we should be heading back inside,” Remus commented as he continued to look at the school. “Wouldn’t want Rom getting all panicked, would we?”
Sirius nodded and dipped the nose of his broom so that he descended steadily to the ground. Remus, in a final moment of recklessness, chose the faster descent and nose-dived towards the ground, pulling up at the very last second to come to an abrupt halt.
“We’ve got to do this again!” Remus exclaimed as Sirius took his broom to put it away.
“If Spion goes away again,” Sirius promised, and they walked back up to the school, Remus once again hidden by the invisibility cloak.
-o-xXx-o-
“Really, Remus.” Professor McGonagall sighed and shook her head in exasperation. “What if someone besides me had seen you out there on the Quidditch pitch? What if you’d been recognised?”
“It was only for a little while,” Remus argued. “Barely even an hour.”
“It would only take a moment for someone to recognise that you aren’t one of the students, even if you are wearing your friend’s clothes.” McGonagall looked him up and down, shaking her head again as she saw the slightly too long sleeves and turned up trousers. She pulled out her wand and pointed it firstly at the shirt, then the trousers, magically adjusting the lengths. “I’ll see about getting you some of your own things from Hogsmeade,” she suggested kindly.
“I think I’ve grown out of them all,” Remus admitted.
“In which case, I think a trip to the lost property office would be in order. You’d be surprised how many items of clothing the students of this school misplace during the course of a year. There must be hundreds of items that have been here for years. I’ll bet I can ever find some of your brother’s old things in there if I looked long enough. According to Professor Sprout he was always losing his belongings.”
“Professor?” Remus asked quietly.
“Yes?”
“I was wondering…”
“Yes?”
“I…will…do you think I’ll ever be able to….?”
“Come to Hogwarts properly?” McGonagall guessed.
Remus nodded and rubbed at his nose in embarrassment.
“I’m afraid I can’t say for sure whether you’ll be able to join your friends here,” McGonagall explained. “I’m afraid it’s a little complicated.”
“Everyone keeps saying that!” Remus snapped impatiently. “It’s complicated, you wouldn’t understand, I’ll explain when you’re older…if you don’t want me being with the other kids, why don’t you just say so?”
“Oh, that’s not it at all, dear,” McGonagall hurriedly assured him, patting him on the shoulder in a calming manner. “I’d like nothing better than for you to be sorted into Gryffindor, though I think Professor Sprout might fight me for you to be in Hufflepuff with her instead.”
“Really?” Remus asked hopefully.
“Really.” McGonagall nodded firmly. “But until this whole mess with the Ministry is sorted out, it’s just impossible.”
“Maybe it would be better for me to give myself up?” Remus suggested. “Get it over with, and then I can come here.”
“I’m afraid that would be impossible.”
“Why not?”
“Because at the moment your legal guardians are still your parents, and unless another family member - an adult - is prepared to take responsibility for you, their decision as to your welfare stands.”
“And they want me dead,” Remus whispered. “Why can’t I just go and live with one of my other relatives? Rom said that Mum had a sister, Aunt Rosina, Rosina White or Wilson or something beginning with W. She works in St Mungo’s, I think.”
“Professor Dumbledore is looking into that at the moment.”
“He is?”
“After your brother was sent to Azkaban, Professor Dumbledore spoke with your parents to try to persuade them to… Well, they wouldn’t listen and so the headmaster has been tracking down all of your relatives to see if he can find one of them who will take responsibility for your upbringing and welfare.”
“Are they difficult to find?” Remus asked with a frown.
“Some are, but the main problem seems to be finding someone who…” Professor McGonagall’s voice trailed off as though she realised that she had said too much. Remus however knew exactly what the unspoken words were.
“Someone who wants me,” he finished quietly.
“I shouldn’t have said so much,” McGonagall scolded herself. “Remus, there are many families out there who would love to have you live with them. It’s just…”
“Complicated?” Remus guessed with a weak smile. “What if Professor Dumbledore asks all my family and none of them want me?”
“Then he’ll find another way to help you,” McGonagall promised. “There’s a law being debated by the Wizengamot which may help.”
“A law?”
“Yes. But it’s taking a long time to be passed. When it does I’m sure Professor Dumbledore will ensure you are one of the first to benefit from it. At least, if he hasn’t found a family member to resume custody of you in the meantime.”
Remus looked at Professor McGonagall and shifted nervously in his seat. “Professor?”
“Yes?”
“Do you think I’d be sorted into Gryffindor?” Remus asked, chewing on his lip as he waited for an answer.
“I’m sure you’d be an asset to the house,” McGonagall replied. “Now, you’d better run along or your friends will be missing you.”
Remus nodded and pulled the invisibility cloak back on. “Thanks, Professor,” he said as he opened the door and crept back through the corridors towards Gryffindor Tower.
Chapter 21