(no subject)
This is my really quick vent about everything post.
and i hate the fact that i havent written in this shit for sooooo long and now that i am its cuz im unhappy and i need to vent, but w/e thats part of what this shit is for.
Soooooooooo the venting begins
I hate how quickly things can change
How your bestfriend can become someone you dont know anymore
How ur family can fall apart so quickly
How boys can ALWAYS make you feel like shit
I hate that when i should be thinking about finals and my future
I cant help but think of my past and miss it, and all the comfort that came with it
I hate that i'm always wanting to rewind time and go back. I never really live in the moment. i know in my next post i'll end up hating that
I hate my current situation but i cant decide what part of it is making me feel that way. i dunno how to change it and make things better. and for some parts of it i hate that theres no way at all to make things better. and taht the closest that i can get to making things better would involve moving home and going to pierce.
i hate how nicole and i dont talk daily anymore and that sometimes we go almost a week without talking. i hate how things arent the same with yuki and i and i no longer feel like i have someone whose life i know everything about and vice versa like i used to with her. i hate that anji telling me she wishes talking more makes me almost want to cry cuz of how much i feel the same yet how much i..scratch that...we, do nothing to change it.
sometimes i hate this fucking place. and these fucking classes. and all of the people i surround myself with. i hate being here and paying all this money to take these classes for my future but having nooooooo idea what i want to be/do. i feel like im wasting my time and my parents money. actually i KNOW that i am. especially cuz right now im doing this instead of writing a paper that's due tomorrow.
I hate that I like a guy in lord knows how long and pretty much i can feel it turning out just like that last guy i liked...and if you know me at all u know that thats anything but good. I hate how confusing liking people is. I how much i suck at it.
I hate that ive used the word hate a bajillion times in this post so now im gonna list all the stuff i love.
I love how my friends are always there for me, especially when i call them at 12 in the morning to bitch and cry (thanks pickle). I love how much they care about me and how they constantly check up on me, especially recently when i need it most (<3 yuki and ayda)
I love the freedom that comes with being here and all the late nights i spend up doing nothing and not studying and stil managing to do well on midterms.
I love way less than i hate but this is just one moement in time
and im sure if i fast forward to tomorrow ill feel totally differently about everything.
so i love how even when im down i know that soon ill be up
im soooo looking forward to spring break.
and i hate the fact that i havent written in this shit for sooooo long and now that i am its cuz im unhappy and i need to vent, but w/e thats part of what this shit is for.
Soooooooooo the venting begins
I hate how quickly things can change
How your bestfriend can become someone you dont know anymore
How ur family can fall apart so quickly
How boys can ALWAYS make you feel like shit
I hate that when i should be thinking about finals and my future
I cant help but think of my past and miss it, and all the comfort that came with it
I hate that i'm always wanting to rewind time and go back. I never really live in the moment. i know in my next post i'll end up hating that
I hate my current situation but i cant decide what part of it is making me feel that way. i dunno how to change it and make things better. and for some parts of it i hate that theres no way at all to make things better. and taht the closest that i can get to making things better would involve moving home and going to pierce.
i hate how nicole and i dont talk daily anymore and that sometimes we go almost a week without talking. i hate how things arent the same with yuki and i and i no longer feel like i have someone whose life i know everything about and vice versa like i used to with her. i hate that anji telling me she wishes talking more makes me almost want to cry cuz of how much i feel the same yet how much i..scratch that...we, do nothing to change it.
sometimes i hate this fucking place. and these fucking classes. and all of the people i surround myself with. i hate being here and paying all this money to take these classes for my future but having nooooooo idea what i want to be/do. i feel like im wasting my time and my parents money. actually i KNOW that i am. especially cuz right now im doing this instead of writing a paper that's due tomorrow.
I hate that I like a guy in lord knows how long and pretty much i can feel it turning out just like that last guy i liked...and if you know me at all u know that thats anything but good. I hate how confusing liking people is. I how much i suck at it.
I hate that ive used the word hate a bajillion times in this post so now im gonna list all the stuff i love.
I love how my friends are always there for me, especially when i call them at 12 in the morning to bitch and cry (thanks pickle). I love how much they care about me and how they constantly check up on me, especially recently when i need it most (<3 yuki and ayda)
I love the freedom that comes with being here and all the late nights i spend up doing nothing and not studying and stil managing to do well on midterms.
I love way less than i hate but this is just one moement in time
and im sure if i fast forward to tomorrow ill feel totally differently about everything.
so i love how even when im down i know that soon ill be up
im soooo looking forward to spring break.