me:
speechles
this morning when i woke up, i stumbled to the beach and sat there. and i sat there. and i thought. it was a very beautiful thing.
i thought about relationships and what they mean and the fact that pretty soon my life is going to change. how im going to be on my own.
i thought about what my dad said to me on the way home. after a weekend with a few things that i regret, to hear his voice made me cry. his stablity was refreshing. i cant describe it, but when i spent a weekend with a whole bunch of people, myself included who are just lost, to hear someone speak who knew a thing or two made me instantly feel whole again. what he said was so true and i dont want to forget it. his words mean the world to me. i almost started to cry when he came to see me at work. i think he knew on the phone that i was upset. and when we hung out i didnt even feel like talking, i just needed that strong presence around. that safety. all i have had around me is weak people, people who are insecure, who are confused, who dont know fuck all.
a long time ago i promised myself i would not feel something i felt that i once felt and today i sat and i felt it in my gut and it broke my heart. it was that same pain.
i get wrapped up in shit. people's bullshit. when there is so fucking much more going on. peoples bullshit just fucking motivates the fuck out of me to not get caught up with people who are stuck in their own worlds of their own fucking drama.
and oh yeah ps: if anyone ever gives up something for you that involves their emotions. it's nice to say thank you. and maybe recognize that theyre being the bigger person. and usually they really do it because they care. more than you would ever think.
in the end everyone can just get what they want. i dont realy give a fuck anymore. just take. take. and take some fucking more.
this morning when i woke up, i stumbled to the beach and sat there. and i sat there. and i thought. it was a very beautiful thing.
i thought about relationships and what they mean and the fact that pretty soon my life is going to change. how im going to be on my own.
i thought about what my dad said to me on the way home. after a weekend with a few things that i regret, to hear his voice made me cry. his stablity was refreshing. i cant describe it, but when i spent a weekend with a whole bunch of people, myself included who are just lost, to hear someone speak who knew a thing or two made me instantly feel whole again. what he said was so true and i dont want to forget it. his words mean the world to me. i almost started to cry when he came to see me at work. i think he knew on the phone that i was upset. and when we hung out i didnt even feel like talking, i just needed that strong presence around. that safety. all i have had around me is weak people, people who are insecure, who are confused, who dont know fuck all.
a long time ago i promised myself i would not feel something i felt that i once felt and today i sat and i felt it in my gut and it broke my heart. it was that same pain.
i get wrapped up in shit. people's bullshit. when there is so fucking much more going on. peoples bullshit just fucking motivates the fuck out of me to not get caught up with people who are stuck in their own worlds of their own fucking drama.
and oh yeah ps: if anyone ever gives up something for you that involves their emotions. it's nice to say thank you. and maybe recognize that theyre being the bigger person. and usually they really do it because they care. more than you would ever think.
in the end everyone can just get what they want. i dont realy give a fuck anymore. just take. take. and take some fucking more.