2 in 1 day.. its how i roll
okay, so heres a real entry. Havent done this in how long? (its best if no one checks)
So I just spent about 1/2 an hour reading through a book I have that I write in. Its almost done, just random writings. If you've known me for a while then you know these already. Anyway, this book started 2 years ago.
And After reading through it I learned a few things.
1) I cant write very well.
2) Im fucked.
Okay, so 2 years ago I discovered that Aids really does love me. We spent a few days at my cottage, and for some reason up there we really fell in love with eachother (despite already dating for 10 months or so by then). Not really the point.
I re-read the past 2 years because recently (this evening pretty much) Ive been feeling shitty and down on myself. I cant exactly place it, which is why Im writing all this, I feel like working it out for all of your enjoyment. (if anyone reads this).
Anyway, My sister is living with me at my house next year. That shouldnt bother me, but we dont get along a lot, so Id rather not live with her, but since I dont have a choice no biggie. Today she told me some of her friends we're coming to check out the house, which is good news since we've had the hardest time getting anyone to rent the place (ie: No one has rented a room as of yet). (And this isnt a post about renting a room, but by all means please do). However, Her friends are checking out the place. Shes telling some people about it. And this is going to sound very very fucking pathetic and self-centered, (but I Assume that most people think Im an egotistical ass anyway) So the house is becoming hers. It seems like it will probably be more her friends, and shit. Which means Im the odd person out, not her. So while shes had the whole live in a house with people and go to university, far away from family, freedom thing, mine is now shit on with her and her friends living with me. I feel like Im being stuffed into a house with her. I've thought this house was gonna be cool, but now it seems like im going to hate it. Im sure Im over reacting, and in a week I'll have the opportunity to post again about how something good with the house has happened, as thats usually the case, but still. I feel shit on right now.
I realise how pathetic Im being, and had anyone else posted this, I would probably think they're being a bit whinny and should just shut the fuck up. I guess I just had different hopes for the house then what its become. Im just in a shitty mood. My job sucks. But I do get to chill with Rolfe all day. P.s. Happy Birthday Rolfe.
Ever get the feeling that everyone around you hates you? Its amazing the stupid thoughts that go through your head some days isnt it? But Ive been thinking a lot about my friends, what they mean to me, and how Ive treated them. So to somewhat conclude this public service announcement of Nick Rose, I'd like to apologize to pretty much everyone that knows me. I understand that I've been a dick to you at some point, but in all honesty, I was only joking. All of you amaze me in 1 way or another, Im glad to have ever met you.
And before some one (probably rolfe if anyone) calls me on posting an "emo-post" Id like say; yea I know how all this sounds, but people aren't emo. People aren't hardcore (or hardxcore or hxc). People are people, thats it. I know what Ive said in the past, but people grow up eventually, and Ive never been one to do things quickly.
This is way to long isn't it?
So. that was interesting.
-Nick.
its funny, I feel a bit better.
So I just spent about 1/2 an hour reading through a book I have that I write in. Its almost done, just random writings. If you've known me for a while then you know these already. Anyway, this book started 2 years ago.
And After reading through it I learned a few things.
1) I cant write very well.
2) Im fucked.
Okay, so 2 years ago I discovered that Aids really does love me. We spent a few days at my cottage, and for some reason up there we really fell in love with eachother (despite already dating for 10 months or so by then). Not really the point.
I re-read the past 2 years because recently (this evening pretty much) Ive been feeling shitty and down on myself. I cant exactly place it, which is why Im writing all this, I feel like working it out for all of your enjoyment. (if anyone reads this).
Anyway, My sister is living with me at my house next year. That shouldnt bother me, but we dont get along a lot, so Id rather not live with her, but since I dont have a choice no biggie. Today she told me some of her friends we're coming to check out the house, which is good news since we've had the hardest time getting anyone to rent the place (ie: No one has rented a room as of yet). (And this isnt a post about renting a room, but by all means please do). However, Her friends are checking out the place. Shes telling some people about it. And this is going to sound very very fucking pathetic and self-centered, (but I Assume that most people think Im an egotistical ass anyway) So the house is becoming hers. It seems like it will probably be more her friends, and shit. Which means Im the odd person out, not her. So while shes had the whole live in a house with people and go to university, far away from family, freedom thing, mine is now shit on with her and her friends living with me. I feel like Im being stuffed into a house with her. I've thought this house was gonna be cool, but now it seems like im going to hate it. Im sure Im over reacting, and in a week I'll have the opportunity to post again about how something good with the house has happened, as thats usually the case, but still. I feel shit on right now.
I realise how pathetic Im being, and had anyone else posted this, I would probably think they're being a bit whinny and should just shut the fuck up. I guess I just had different hopes for the house then what its become. Im just in a shitty mood. My job sucks. But I do get to chill with Rolfe all day. P.s. Happy Birthday Rolfe.
Ever get the feeling that everyone around you hates you? Its amazing the stupid thoughts that go through your head some days isnt it? But Ive been thinking a lot about my friends, what they mean to me, and how Ive treated them. So to somewhat conclude this public service announcement of Nick Rose, I'd like to apologize to pretty much everyone that knows me. I understand that I've been a dick to you at some point, but in all honesty, I was only joking. All of you amaze me in 1 way or another, Im glad to have ever met you.
And before some one (probably rolfe if anyone) calls me on posting an "emo-post" Id like say; yea I know how all this sounds, but people aren't emo. People aren't hardcore (or hardxcore or hxc). People are people, thats it. I know what Ive said in the past, but people grow up eventually, and Ive never been one to do things quickly.
This is way to long isn't it?
So. that was interesting.
-Nick.
its funny, I feel a bit better.