hmm

[fuck_emo_im_hxc]

well tonight was good... played a bad ass show ... or so everyone told me ...
so yes...it did start out nicely...
oh so nice it was... so many wonderful compliments and fantastic remarks towards the band
it was fabulous... everyone was in love with us and i felt whole again
because thats all i really want... for people to know my name...
thats all anybody wants

"nobody is going to put you on the map..
you have to do that yourself
and youre not getting anywhere
by doing anything someone else has already done
so be original, you fuck !"
quote of a wise man named turtle (that's me)

i really dont understand why i like to meet peoples expectations and make them think so highly of me...
im not that fucking cool... people just like to pretend i am...
i guess...
first things first...
i hate you...
and dont know what i was thinking when i said those words...
i should have just listened to everyone and stayed away..
what the fuck was i thinking
but..
you cant fuck with my integrity
so i guess thats what it all boils down to...
integrity...
integrity... honesty.... trust... all that bullshit that people put so much faith into..
what the fuck was i thinking ...

i'm really not quite sure where this is going.. whether it's a guilt trip on her... or myself...but i feel a lot better...

...shove it up your ass

SINCERELY,

turtle

I won't rest until i forget about it