New day.
I hate that you stole my best friend from me.
I hate that I let it happen, that I let her go without a fight and didn't give her the benefit of the doubt.
I hate that I let my own suspicions get the best of me.
I hate that after all was said and done, I cared about you. I let the snake into the garden, so to speak.
I hate that I allowed you to continue it for as long as it was continued for.
I hate that I allowed this - and you - to affect other aspects of my life.
I hate that this went on for as long as it did.
I hate how your lies sounded so much better than her truth.
I hate how much time this took from us, and how we can't get it back.
I hate how many other people got dragged into this.
I hate how none of this made any sense at all, and that I can't put it together in a way that does.
I hate that we've been through so much together and we let an immature child get between us.
I hate that I took the word of a child over the word of my best friend.
I hate that I didn't apologize when I felt bad.
I hate all the fights that I instigated.
I hate that even though logically I know it's over, emotionally I'm still hurt over something that likely never even happened.
I hate that I can't put this behind me even though it's done.
I hate HEWEY PEEING ON MY FOOT RIGHT NOW, GOD DAMMIT NEEDY RAT IS SO NEEDY.
I hate that your life went on without me. I hate that mine went on without you.
I hate that no matter how hard I try, I still don't fully trust you, and it's probably not either of our faults.
But most of all.. I hate the fact that we let this little girl, who we barely knew, destroy a two-year-old relationship between best friends.. and I hate that it probably indicates a deeper problem in our relationship that we barely even scratched the surface of. And I hate that I don't know what it is or how to fix it. I hate it.
EDIT: I HATE HOW BORED I AM OF MY LAYOUT. I NEED A FUCKING NEW LAYOUT.
I hate that I let it happen, that I let her go without a fight and didn't give her the benefit of the doubt.
I hate that I let my own suspicions get the best of me.
I hate that after all was said and done, I cared about you. I let the snake into the garden, so to speak.
I hate that I allowed you to continue it for as long as it was continued for.
I hate that I allowed this - and you - to affect other aspects of my life.
I hate that this went on for as long as it did.
I hate how your lies sounded so much better than her truth.
I hate how much time this took from us, and how we can't get it back.
I hate how many other people got dragged into this.
I hate how none of this made any sense at all, and that I can't put it together in a way that does.
I hate that we've been through so much together and we let an immature child get between us.
I hate that I took the word of a child over the word of my best friend.
I hate that I didn't apologize when I felt bad.
I hate all the fights that I instigated.
I hate that even though logically I know it's over, emotionally I'm still hurt over something that likely never even happened.
I hate that I can't put this behind me even though it's done.
I hate HEWEY PEEING ON MY FOOT RIGHT NOW, GOD DAMMIT NEEDY RAT IS SO NEEDY.
I hate that your life went on without me. I hate that mine went on without you.
I hate that no matter how hard I try, I still don't fully trust you, and it's probably not either of our faults.
But most of all.. I hate the fact that we let this little girl, who we barely knew, destroy a two-year-old relationship between best friends.. and I hate that it probably indicates a deeper problem in our relationship that we barely even scratched the surface of. And I hate that I don't know what it is or how to fix it. I hate it.
EDIT: I HATE HOW BORED I AM OF MY LAYOUT. I NEED A FUCKING NEW LAYOUT.