a_basket_case
in
ftm
(no subject)
Hello all,
I've posted here before but things have changed a bit since then so I'll reintroduce myself. I'm Angeles, 15 (soon sweet 16), from MA. I'm in the early stages of coming out to myself as FTM. I'm also out to some friends and am semi-open at school (my school is very laid-back about such things) but am not out to family.
I have some questions...
1. I'm really interested in hearing from other guys my age, or who came out/started transition around my age. The only FTM people I know in "real life" are older, and I don't know much about what's done or considered appropriate for young'ns. I see a therapist already, for other issues (anxiety/depression), but she doesn't seem to know a lot about trans issues. Almost any information would be really appreciated.
2. I'm sure this has been gone over a million times, but coming out to parents, gaah. I'm out to my parents as gay/bi, and it was totally a nonissue, but I'm much more worried about the trans thing. I'm not afraid that they'd be angry or anything, but I am worried that they won't take me seriously (this is one of my biggest anxieties in all areas of life), or that they'll tell me I'm not old enough to make that "decision." At the same time, I know they suspect something is up, since I've rather suddenly changed my dress/grooming habits and have a binder that I'm trying to keep secret. I'm really afraid of how my brother will react, too -- he can be a real ass about this stuff, and I'm very sensitive to his opinions. Is there a "right" way to come out to parents, and should I keep putting it off, or is it worth it to come out now and get the ball, so to speak, rolling?
3. Did any of you compete in NCAA athletics during/after transition? I'm a fencer, and I plan to compete (hopefully at the varsity level) in college. I need to figure out which sex they'll have me competing as, since mens' and womens' fencing are quite different stylistically and I'd need to start practicing against more men. Also, is there a way to get a drug exception for medically-prescribed testosterone? I've asked around at a fencing forum and also searched the NCAA site, but I haven't been able to get a concrete answer.
4. This is an easy one. Do you have a gender association with the name "Angeles"? I took it on thinking it was androgynous, but in retrospect I think it's actually a girls' name, so not the best choice for trying to be seen as a boy. I don't really want to switch away from it so soon, though, since for one everyone's just getting used to it and two I think it's a lovely name. Permanently I'd like to be Gabriel, but at this stage in the coming-out process I think it's easier for everyone to call me by a gender-neutral name.
Thanks so much and sorry for the length!
I've posted here before but things have changed a bit since then so I'll reintroduce myself. I'm Angeles, 15 (soon sweet 16), from MA. I'm in the early stages of coming out to myself as FTM. I'm also out to some friends and am semi-open at school (my school is very laid-back about such things) but am not out to family.
I have some questions...
1. I'm really interested in hearing from other guys my age, or who came out/started transition around my age. The only FTM people I know in "real life" are older, and I don't know much about what's done or considered appropriate for young'ns. I see a therapist already, for other issues (anxiety/depression), but she doesn't seem to know a lot about trans issues. Almost any information would be really appreciated.
2. I'm sure this has been gone over a million times, but coming out to parents, gaah. I'm out to my parents as gay/bi, and it was totally a nonissue, but I'm much more worried about the trans thing. I'm not afraid that they'd be angry or anything, but I am worried that they won't take me seriously (this is one of my biggest anxieties in all areas of life), or that they'll tell me I'm not old enough to make that "decision." At the same time, I know they suspect something is up, since I've rather suddenly changed my dress/grooming habits and have a binder that I'm trying to keep secret. I'm really afraid of how my brother will react, too -- he can be a real ass about this stuff, and I'm very sensitive to his opinions. Is there a "right" way to come out to parents, and should I keep putting it off, or is it worth it to come out now and get the ball, so to speak, rolling?
3. Did any of you compete in NCAA athletics during/after transition? I'm a fencer, and I plan to compete (hopefully at the varsity level) in college. I need to figure out which sex they'll have me competing as, since mens' and womens' fencing are quite different stylistically and I'd need to start practicing against more men. Also, is there a way to get a drug exception for medically-prescribed testosterone? I've asked around at a fencing forum and also searched the NCAA site, but I haven't been able to get a concrete answer.
4. This is an easy one. Do you have a gender association with the name "Angeles"? I took it on thinking it was androgynous, but in retrospect I think it's actually a girls' name, so not the best choice for trying to be seen as a boy. I don't really want to switch away from it so soon, though, since for one everyone's just getting used to it and two I think it's a lovely name. Permanently I'd like to be Gabriel, but at this stage in the coming-out process I think it's easier for everyone to call me by a gender-neutral name.
Thanks so much and sorry for the length!