Invisible Pain
Title: Invisible Pain (6/?)
Author: his_angel16
Pairing: Jaejin/Wonbin, Hongki/Minhwan, Jonghun/Seunghyun
Genre: Angst, Romance
Rating: PG
Summary: Jaejin always hid his feelings. When he confessed, he had a chance of changing his words as if he had never spoken them. Now, all he can do is wonder if he had chosen right.
A/N: I'm sorry it took me so long to update this. ^^; The next chapter will probably be the last one for this fic, but there are many more that I plan to write. Thanks for the patience~!
Chapter Six:
Jaejin stared at the empty doorway, too stunned to move. He felt a hand on his shoulder and forced his eyes to meet Hongki’s. “Want me to help you look for him?” Hongki asked, voice sympathetic.
Jaejin shook his head. “No, I’ll look by myself. If Wonbin were to see us together, even if we weren’t doing anything, he’d assume that we like each other.” He turned, stopping when he noticed Minhwan on the side. “If Wonbin never forgives me, I’ll never forgive you either.”
Minhwan watched as Jaejin left, the door slamming shut only added to the threat. He turned to Hongki, tears in his eyes. “I really messed up, didn’t I?” he asked, blinking in an attempt to keep the tears from falling. They rolled down his cheeks as his legs gave out.
“Minhwan,” Jonghun said, going to calm the younger. Hongki stared at Minhwan, sobs wracking the younger’s body. He glared at the wall before heading out the door, it slamming once more as he rushed off. Minhwan had flinched when the sound echoed through the dorm, sobbing harder as thoughts of losing Hongki because of his own insecurities flooded his mind.
Jaejin ran, the muscles in his legs screaming in protest as he pushed himself farther. He stopped, gasping for air as he whirled around, trying to figure out how Wonbin had gotten away so quickly. He felt tears spring to his eyes, not wanting to let go of the elder. He closed his eyes, willing himself to know where Wonbin went. He inhaled deeply, trying to calm himself down as nothing came to him. He felt droplets of water fall on him, eyes flashing open in time to see lightning streak across the sky. Once the thunder crackled, he covered his ears, crouching into a ball as he rocked back and forth.
“Wonbin, please,” he pleaded, eyes screwed shut so tightly that he was almost seeing stars. “Where are you? Come back…please come back.”
“Jaejin,” someone whispered.
Snapping his head up and opening his eyes, Jaejin looked over, seeing Hongki standing there, rain soaking into his clothes. “Hongki hyung…”
“Jaejin, let’s go home. We’ll look for Wonbin after the storm stops.” He reached out, waiting for the younger to take his hand.
Jaejin shook his head, getting to his feet. “No. I have to find him now. You don’t understand, Hongki. I love him. I can’t live without him anymore.”
Sighing, Hongki approached him. “We’ll look for him after it stops storming. Right now, we need to get home.” Grabbing the younger’s wrist, Hongki turned to head home.
“No!” Jaejin pulled away from him. Tears falling from his eyes to be mixed with the rain pelting his face. His eyes were stony as he glared at Hongki. “I’m not going back until I can find Wonbin and explain everything to him. There was a time when I first loved you, Hongki, but not anymore. I used you to fill the void that Wonbin created when he left.”
Hongki frowned. “You’ve loved him since the beginning, haven’t you?”
Nodding, Jaejin took a step back, lightning flashing again and thunder following it. He flinched, covering his ears until the sky quieted down. “I’m going to look for him.” Turning, Jaejin sprinted away, heading to nowhere in particular in his search.
Watching him leave, Hongki pulled out his phone, scrolling through his contacts until he spotted the one name he had always thought of deleting, but never did. Dialing Wonbin’s number, he sighed as it went to voicemail. “Hey, Oh Wonbin, it’s me,” Hongki started. “I know I’m probably the last person you want to see, but Jaejin’s out looking for you. I tried to convince him to come home, but he insisted on waiting until he found you. Get to Jaejin before the storm worsens.”
Wonbin leaned against the back of his couch, eyes closed as he heard the answering machine beep, Hongki’s voice flowing to his ears. He leaned over, finger hovering over the erase button, but after hearing him mention Jaejin, he froze. Listening to the message, Wonbin felt his heart nearly stop. He looked to the window as a bolt of lightning shot through the sky, the thunder following a split second after it.
“The storm is getting worse,” he whispered. He jumped up, grabbing his phone on his way to the door. Slipping on his shoes, he raced down the hall of his apartment complex. “Jaejin, I’m coming for you.”
He ran around in circles for over two hours, not once running into Jaejin. He found himself in front of FT Island’s dorm, hand raised as he knocked on the door. When it swung open, he was faced with Jonghun, who ushered him inside and out of the elements. Wonbin immediately went to the living room, finding Hongki on the couch watching the weather channel.
Seunghyun looked up from the book he was reading, nudging Hongki with his elbow. Once he had the other’s attention, he nodded to the other side of the couch. “Hey, look who’s here,” Seunghyun said, closing his book.
Hongki turned, eyes falling upon Wonbin, his clothes drenched from the rain. “What are you doing here?” he asked, eyes widening as Wonbin fell to his knees.
“I can’t find Jaejin,” Wonbin murmured, tears spilling over. He sniffled, looking away as he wiped at his eyes. “I’ve been looking for him for two hours and I still can’t find him.”
“Hyung hasn’t been home since he went out to look for you,” Seunghyun replied. “And he doesn’t have his phone on him either.”
Wonbin looked at Seunghyun before turning his eyes back to Hongki. “What am I going to do? Jaejin is terrified of storms and he’s out there by himself.”
Hongki reached out, Wonbin nearly falling into him. “We’ll find him, Bin. Even if we have to search all night, the five of us can find him.”
Minhwan entered the room, freezing at seeing Wonbin with Hongki’s arms around him. “Wonbin hyung, why are you here?” he asked, voice low.
“Jaejin’s missing,” Jonghun explained, going to the hall closet. He pulled out three backpacks, all containing emergency supplies. “We’ll go in groups of two.”
“One of us has to be alone if we do it that way,” Seunghyun said.
“Then, to make it fair, I’ll be by myself,” Wonbin offered, sniffling again as Hongki used his shirtsleeve to wipe away his tears.
“No,” Minhwan interrupted, eyes closed. He opened them, looking at each of them. “I’ll go by myself. Wonbin hyung, you go with Hongki. Seunghyun with Jonghun.”
“Why should you have to go by yourself?” Hongki protested, patting Wonbin’s back.
“I’m the reason he left in such a hurry. I was upset that he might take you away from me.” He shook his head, tears in his eyes. “But I was wrong. Jaejin doesn’t like you anymore. He only relied on you when Wonbin was gone.”
Wonbin stared at him, standing on shaky legs. He approached Minhwan, eyes wide. “W-what did you say? He relied on Hongki when I wasn’t here? Then, that means he…?”
“Jaejin’s always loved you, Bin,” Jonghun said. He handed Hongki a backpack, slinging one over his shoulders. He looked at Minhwan and Wonbin, not sure which one would be by themselves. “Seunghyun, let’s go.”
Hongki slung the straps over his shoulders. “Minhwan, let’s go, too.”
Minhwan shook his head, grabbing the bag from Jonghun and racing out the door. He hurried from their home, running down random streets. He stopped, gasping for air as he looked around for Jaejin, not seeing him anywhere. “Jaejin!” he shouted, the thunder drowning out his voice. “Hyung, where are you?”
Hongki sighed, taking Wonbin’s hand. “Let’s go. The sooner we find Jaejin, the sooner we can come home and get him dried off. He’ll probably catch a cold if we can’t find him by nightfall.”
Wonbin nodded, his hold tightening on Hongki’s hand. “We’ll find him, right? He’ll be okay, won’t he?”
“This is Jaejin we’re talking about,” Seunghyun said, smiling. “Wonbin hyung’s Jaejin. If he had enough common sense to fall for someone like you, then he’ll be fine.”
Wonbin smiled a little at Seunghyun’s words. “Thanks. You don’t know how much those words mean to me right now.”
“We’ll look in all of Jaejin’s usual places,” Jonghun said. “He likes to hang out in the parks and at the more remote cafés to steer clear of most fans.”
Hongki nodded. “We’ll check the parks. You and Seunghyun check the cafés.”
“Good idea. I wonder where Minhwan will be searching.”
Hongki frowned, the younger’s face coming to mind. “I hope he’ll be okay on his own.”
Wonbin gave him a pat on the shoulder. “Minhwan will be fine. Any one of us would be fine on our own.”
They all nodded, heading out the door and splitting into their two teams. Wonbin ran as fast as he could, his legs carrying him over the sidewalk. Jaejin, Minhwan. The two of you had better be safe. If anything happens to either of you, I don’t know what I’d do with myself. Jaejinnie, I hope you found shelter of some sort. I know you hate storms, but I don’t want you to fall ill because you’re out trying to find me.
Jaejin stumbled over his own feet, his legs numb as the freezing rain soaked through his clothes. He covered his mouth, coughing into his hand before he looked up, trying to find some sort of escape from the storm. Taking a few more steps, he felt his legs slip out from under him, slipping down the hill and into the river. The water robbed him of his breath, but he pushed off of the riverbed, gasping for air as he broke the surface. Reaching out, he caught hold of a fallen tree, it’s branches a safety net to him.
Wonbin, he thought, coughing again. Wonbin, I love you. If things are meant to be this way, if I’m not allowed to have a happy ending with you, then I want to stay here until I become so numb that I can’t feel anything anymore.
He closed his eyes, shivering in the water as thunder crackled overhead. He whimpered, tears trailing down his cheeks to drop in the river. “Wonbin, I don’t want to lose you. Please, know that I love you and I always have…Hongki is merely a hyung to me, but you…you’re so much more than that.”
Minhwan kept walking, the rain pelting him in the face cold enough to make him shiver. “Jaejin!” he called out, gaining no response. He was near the river they had met at earlier, trying to retrace his steps in case Jaejin had done the same. He walked a little farther, tripping and falling onto his hands and knees. “Where are you, Jin?” He didn’t know what, but he had a feeling that something had drawn him to this place. He crawled over to the edge, peering down the hill. He noticed a tree, something clinging to it for dear life. His eyes widened as recognition hit him. “Jaejin!”
Jaejin lifted his head up a little, hearing his name from a familiar voice. “Min…Minhwan?” Through blurry eyes, he spotted the younger up the hill where he had slipped moments ago. He smiled despite his situation. “It’s Minhwan. I can relax now.”
Minhwan noticed Jaejin looking up at him, watching as the elder’s grip on the branches of the tree began to relax. He pulled the backpack from his shoulders, snatching the walkie-talkie from the side and holding the button down. “I’ve found Jaejin! We’re at the river. Well, he’s in the river, but that’s not the point. Get here as soon as you can!” He tossed the device on the backpack, sliding on his side down into the river.
Reemerging, Minhwan spluttered, swinging his arms and legs in time with each other to propel his body toward Jaejin. Just as he was within reach, Jaejin let go of the tree, slipping below the surface of the water. Inhaling and holding his breath, Minhwan dove after him. Surfacing, Minhwan had Jaejin under the arms, his head tipped away from the water so he could breathe.
Hurry up and get here, Minhwan pleaded silently, wrapping his free arm around a branch. I don’t know how long I can keep both of us here. Hongki, Seunghyun, Jonghun, Wonbin…I don’t care who makes it here first. Just someone, please help us!
Wonbin froze after Minhwan’s voice faded from the walkie-talkie strapped to the side of the backpack Hongki carried. Without warning, he turned and sprinted off in the dark, hurrying to the river. He faintly heard Hongki running after him, relaying a message to Jonghun and Seunghyun to meet them at the river. He stopped momentarily at spotting Minhwan’s backpack resting on the side of the road. He hurried over, looking down the hill to where Minhwan struggled to keep both himself and Jaejin above the water‘s surface.
“Minhwan!” Wonbin hollered, the younger looking up, relief filling him. Wonbin slid down the hill, mud splattering up into his face and on his clothes. Plunging into the river, he swam over to where Minhwan and Jaejin were. “Give him to me,” he murmured, grabbing onto the branch as he reached for Jaejin.
Minhwan allowed his hyung to be pulled from his grasp, feeling lighter instantly. He looked up at Hongki. “Hongki, call an ambulance! Jaejin fainted a few minutes ago and I can’t get him to respond. If we can’t get him out of the water soon, he might catch pneumonia.”
Hongki nodded, pulling his phone out as Jonghun and Seunghyun raced up to him. He dialed quickly, placing the phone to his ear. “We need medical assistance at the river. A friend of ours slipped into it and he’s not conscious.” He waited for them to locate his phone via GPS before he disconnected the call.
“Are they on their way?” Jonghun asked, eyes glued to the three in the river. “Jaejin will be okay, won’t he?”
Hongki gnawed on his lip as he heard sirens wail in the distance. “He’ll be fine. He has to be. Not only for his sake and FT Island’s sake…but for Wonbin’s sake as well. If he gets really sick, Wonbin won’t forgive himself for it, justifying that it’s his fault that Jaejin was out in the storm.”
A few minutes later, a rescue team jumped out of a truck, followed by paramedics from an ambulance. They rushed down the hill, splashing into the water and making their way to Minhwan, Wonbin, and Jaejin. Wonbin let the rescuers take Jaejin from his grasp, reluctant to do so at first. Once they had Jaejin up the hill and the paramedics were loading him onto the stretcher, the three rescuers returned to get Wonbin and Minhwan.
“I’m going with him in the ambulance,” Wonbin stated, trying to keep his teeth from chattering.
“What relation are you to him?” the paramedic asked.
Wonbin stared at him, completely serious when he spoke. “I’m his boyfriend. Please, don’t separate us. We’ve been through hell the past couple of days and I really don’t want to leave his side.”
The paramedic seemed to think over Wonbin’s words before he nodded to the ambulance. “Get in the back after we load him in.”
Relieved, Wonbin waited as patiently as he could while they loaded Jaejin into the ambulance. The paramedic he had been talking to climbed in the front as he and another paramedic climbed in the back. He looked at Hongki. “Meet us at the hospital.”
Hongki nodded, watching the doors close as the lights and sirens began again, the ambulance heading off to the hospital. “Let’s get going. Wonbin’s depending on us,” Hongki stated, grabbing Minhwan’s backpack from the ground. “Minhwan should be checked out, too, in case he gets sick.”
“I’ll be fine, Hongki. I’m worried about Jaejin. I don’t know how long he was there before I got here. With the storm itself he was probably soaked. Being in that river only made things worse for him.”
They turned and followed the ambulance, running after it as if their lives depended on it. They had lost sight of it as it sped up, rounding the corner as other vehicles pulled to the side of the road to get out of the way. After twenty minutes of running, they finally arrived at the hospital, all panting. Entering the hospital, they found Wonbin pacing in the waiting room, hands tangled into his hair as he worried.