I set you GONE
I set you free .... GONE
8/17/05
I wont let myself die of a broken heart
My lips no longer sweat to move words to your selfish ear
My sex no longer await your impassionate member
Although my heart pounds to infinite beats beyond normal
I dare not waste my earthly being on your fixed appointments that crush me beyond my very own birth
Destroy me
Destroy me
My heart begs
and races like the white pony itself-
For I’ve spent three years to grow away from you
And towards my thoughtful happiness
So I say to myself-
As I look down on my skin
Where pain resides as a childish memory of you
When you were just a memory in my past.
What is right!?!?!?-
Shall I ever walk the path of knives in my dreams
and wake to a:
One hallway
One cafeteria
One room containing two stiff beds
Shots in my ass, brick walls to grind my knuckles on
to feel -because they have numbed me to dumbness.
That I fear,
That I hate
That I don’t connect or know as me-
But I’ve only been living under this sunshine a year and a half now
How long before I fall a victim to this coma?
And you, the creator of the only home I’ve felt,
Decides to seek me out and withdrawn so quickly, insanely
Passing on what I have lived my entire life to witness as
The greatest feat to be known as ONE
You and I
Cause we never were and never will be TWO…
But 25 pounds lighter and zero rings to my phone later-
My only emotion grows still and bitter
As sick as my hunger.
I decide this time
I hate you - for impairing yourself to ever love me the way I love you
And with that I dare walk away and stand tall and true to what I deserve-
With not any less of a heart, but more a mind
You shall not bring me down.
For all the spontaneous love, passion, intimacy, happiness and romance I am capable of giving
I will find my prince who didn’t and would never think of another.
8/17/05
I wont let myself die of a broken heart
My lips no longer sweat to move words to your selfish ear
My sex no longer await your impassionate member
Although my heart pounds to infinite beats beyond normal
I dare not waste my earthly being on your fixed appointments that crush me beyond my very own birth
Destroy me
Destroy me
My heart begs
and races like the white pony itself-
For I’ve spent three years to grow away from you
And towards my thoughtful happiness
So I say to myself-
As I look down on my skin
Where pain resides as a childish memory of you
When you were just a memory in my past.
What is right!?!?!?-
Shall I ever walk the path of knives in my dreams
and wake to a:
One hallway
One cafeteria
One room containing two stiff beds
Shots in my ass, brick walls to grind my knuckles on
to feel -because they have numbed me to dumbness.
That I fear,
That I hate
That I don’t connect or know as me-
But I’ve only been living under this sunshine a year and a half now
How long before I fall a victim to this coma?
And you, the creator of the only home I’ve felt,
Decides to seek me out and withdrawn so quickly, insanely
Passing on what I have lived my entire life to witness as
The greatest feat to be known as ONE
You and I
Cause we never were and never will be TWO…
But 25 pounds lighter and zero rings to my phone later-
My only emotion grows still and bitter
As sick as my hunger.
I decide this time
I hate you - for impairing yourself to ever love me the way I love you
And with that I dare walk away and stand tall and true to what I deserve-
With not any less of a heart, but more a mind
You shall not bring me down.
For all the spontaneous love, passion, intimacy, happiness and romance I am capable of giving
I will find my prince who didn’t and would never think of another.