(no subject)
I'm home! My God, I haven't been this happy in a long time. It's great! I can't explain it...I've gone away and come back but somehow it was never like this. I've never gotten this much attention from people generally. And I really missed everything, the people and my hometown. It was really strange seeing it again, when I left it was still gloomy winter and now everything is so pretty and green! Hehe I never realized before how full of grass and trees my town is.
I can't wait to give all those gifts I bought for my friends. I've put a lot of thought into some of these and I love that feeling, seeing their face when they open it.
I haven't seen my boy yet, not properly that is, which is making me feel kind of crap. I saw him only for a second but we were so far away and I don't think he saw me. So I feel like this is how our relationship is standing. We've become strangers in the distance. I know I said I was happy but there's just a part of me that feels empty because of him. I honestly don't have any hopes of us getting together but I just don't want to graduate and leave it like this. After all this time it would just be so crappy to end it like there never was anything. I need to talk to him so badly. And right now the odds of that happening are not good so it makes me miserable just thinking about it...what if this right now is how it really is and I never see or talk to him again?
Anyway, I have to get a grip and push him out of my system. My written German exam is now on Wednesday and the oral one is the next day. So that's when it starts. I'm so glad that it's finally here and I can finish these exams. It's funny, I'm not even nervous about them anymore. Oh I've also been exempted from doing the big essay exam seniors have to do, yay! Well basically, things are hectic right now but once they've calmed down, I'll be back here properly, doing tons of commenting and all hehe. I can't wait till prom, I have my dress, shoes, bag, everything! Lol, I sound like such a girl.
I can't wait to give all those gifts I bought for my friends. I've put a lot of thought into some of these and I love that feeling, seeing their face when they open it.
I haven't seen my boy yet, not properly that is, which is making me feel kind of crap. I saw him only for a second but we were so far away and I don't think he saw me. So I feel like this is how our relationship is standing. We've become strangers in the distance. I know I said I was happy but there's just a part of me that feels empty because of him. I honestly don't have any hopes of us getting together but I just don't want to graduate and leave it like this. After all this time it would just be so crappy to end it like there never was anything. I need to talk to him so badly. And right now the odds of that happening are not good so it makes me miserable just thinking about it...what if this right now is how it really is and I never see or talk to him again?
Anyway, I have to get a grip and push him out of my system. My written German exam is now on Wednesday and the oral one is the next day. So that's when it starts. I'm so glad that it's finally here and I can finish these exams. It's funny, I'm not even nervous about them anymore. Oh I've also been exempted from doing the big essay exam seniors have to do, yay! Well basically, things are hectic right now but once they've calmed down, I'll be back here properly, doing tons of commenting and all hehe. I can't wait till prom, I have my dress, shoes, bag, everything! Lol, I sound like such a girl.