LOL
Bleak Expectations does tend to take my mind off my current woes for a short period.
Things like this help a lot:
Gently: Ah, you may have some money again, Pip Bin, but it will soon go. Your book will be published and it will be awful and no one will buy it and soon it will be in the eight books for a shilling pile and then you'll be poor again and then you'll end up a bitter old man with a bottom drawer full of unpublished novels until finally you ironically die in a library...when you find your stupid book isn't stocked there and you shake the shelves in rage and they fall on you and the last sight you ever see will be the copy of your book which actually was there all along but the last datestamp will show its only ever been borrowed once forty-three years before and that was by mistake.
Pip: That's a very complex prediction.
Later...
Sir Philip Bin (Old Pip): My book was an instant best seller and I was rich again. The reviews were excellent, apart from one...though I've no idea how Mr. Benevolent had become literary editor of the Times.
Gently (reading his review): This is a really, really bad book and no one should buy it. Unless, perhaps you want to buy it, become enraged at how bad it is, take it to Pip Bin's house, demand your money back, and then punch him. Don't buy this book, do not buy it. Five stars out of nine...hundred.
Oh, he makes me laugh....
Don't get me started on the moles...
Things like this help a lot:
Gently: Ah, you may have some money again, Pip Bin, but it will soon go. Your book will be published and it will be awful and no one will buy it and soon it will be in the eight books for a shilling pile and then you'll be poor again and then you'll end up a bitter old man with a bottom drawer full of unpublished novels until finally you ironically die in a library...when you find your stupid book isn't stocked there and you shake the shelves in rage and they fall on you and the last sight you ever see will be the copy of your book which actually was there all along but the last datestamp will show its only ever been borrowed once forty-three years before and that was by mistake.
Pip: That's a very complex prediction.
Later...
Sir Philip Bin (Old Pip): My book was an instant best seller and I was rich again. The reviews were excellent, apart from one...though I've no idea how Mr. Benevolent had become literary editor of the Times.
Gently (reading his review): This is a really, really bad book and no one should buy it. Unless, perhaps you want to buy it, become enraged at how bad it is, take it to Pip Bin's house, demand your money back, and then punch him. Don't buy this book, do not buy it. Five stars out of nine...hundred.
Oh, he makes me laugh....
Don't get me started on the moles...