part one: apparent dependence.
on the surface and for a good bit below the surface, i seem clingy or in need of people. however, i am a very independent individual. i do not rely on the reassurance of others in order to function. in fact, the opposite is true. i avoid "needing" other people because i know how they can be given too much power over anyone else. BUT, i make a conscious effort to want people in my life. i force myself to think i need someone close to me. the reason for this effort? i am not, nor do i wish to come across as, thinking myself greater than anyone. so, the conflict in this case is that i don't NEED people, but i WANT to need people. a pitiful state in itself, almost as much so as just needing the fucking company.