why me?
why me? i dont understand any of this. i hate the drug thing that i had to do. my brain is fried. i hate it. cause of it i have no heart, no feelings, at least i think that i don't. but i guess that i am totally wrong. i can't stand to hear about it. who can i talk to? tony? no. craig? no. derrick? no. carie? i don't even know if she likes me. so i can't talk to her. as i am sittin here startin to cry right in the middle of class. normally i would care, but i don't. my head is all fucked up. i need to talk. i can't keep everything all bottled up inside. it will hurt ten times more than what it already does at the moment. where is jessica? i do beleive that i can talk to her. but will she share it with everyone else? i think not. im so sorry to everyone else that i can't talk to. i would just feel stupid or mean or a jackass. i want to converse with her. where is she? i don't know. god why does this have to be me? i dont want it to. but no. maybe it isn't. maybe i am dreamin. yes thats it. all i have to do is to play this whole thing off as a dream. but happens when i realzie that this is reality again? where will i go? my heart hurts so much. i just wish i never came to summit academy. i wouldn't be in this predicamant that i am in. but no. i can't speak any more. it is like when when u try ur hardest to talk to someone when u are cryin. but instead of talkin, i can't see straight, i can't think, i can't even come to type wht i want. so i am gonna go and cry right in the middle of the class. (as i cry, please dont cry, feel bad or sad, just forget about me)