So what now?
I'm going to start off with the good stuff first, I am adding a Wednesday belly dance class to my schedule. I figure I learned a lot at Pennsic that I don't want to loose it by not practicing and some new moves would be great too. I ordered a pair of mufflers for my zills so I can practice at home without pissing off the neighbors, they are rainbow and I can't wait until they arrive. I joined one of the local SCA groups FB page. Technically I'm not part of their group but I'm in a county that no one seems to care about, we don't have a community college, we barely have shopping (I have to drive 30 minutes to get the the nearest mall and the nice clean grocery store is in the next county) and we aren't included in the local SCA list of groups so be default we are part of the Barony-Marche of the Debatable lands... lucky for me the next county over has a group and they are having an event less than 15 minutes from where I live.
I bought a Power Ball ticket, I know I won't win but on the off chance I get lucky I already have ideas on how to live on 425 million, they include getting out of PA and maybe looking into the west coast... everything I want or like to do happens between California and Washington or from Florida to New York and at this point I'm tried of being alone in PA, yes I have my job but that isn't as great as it used to be.
It seems all the good done by taking a week off and going to Pennsic is being rapidly undone at the office. I'm beginning to think that I may want to start looking for another job as there are things coming up that I'm finding a bit troublesome for my own piece of mind. I genuinely like the people I work with and the job is something that I can do practically asleep but recently there have been a few times where I think that there may be promises made that can come back and bite someone in the ass and I'm not sure I want my name connected with that if it happens. I'm pretty sure the issues are because I have a co-worker that won't allow anyone else to help out and has gotten so far behind that things are being missed and excuses are being made and I'm waiting for something to happen that can't be fixed or smoothed over.
They are talking about another project we need to work on and by we I mean it's getting dumped in my lap because even though they both went out of the country for a few weeks on vacation (Ireland and Australia) and I went camping for a week they have it timed so I'll be in the office and working on it and someone will be off at the beach... hint it's not me. I also seem to have not gotten a raise again... but at least I still have health insurance, I get told almost yearly that I would have gotten a raise but the insurance premiums went up... and really as much as a raise would be nice I do like having health care coverage. I think worrying is getting to be the least of my concerns as I'm starting to get angry that I give and give and take care of everything and some days it feels like I'm being taken advantage of... it used to feel like family and I miss that, it was the only reason I stayed and didn't move back to New York as soon as D and I split, I didn't want to leave them short handed. They treated me well and appreciated me, now it's hit or miss on any given day whether or not it's going to be a decent day or if someone is going to have a bug up their ass and take it out on me since I'm the only non-family member that works there.
If I start looking like I may leave they get all sweet again but it doesn't last... I've been there 12 years and it's getting to feel like a chore. There are some times I think that maybe I should pack up and take a shot anywhere else... I also think my chances of finding a romantic partner might increase if I moved someplace that was more urban and open minded, I like country living but this isn't it... I have the worst of it all, it's populated enough to have a pretty rampant drug and alcohol issue as well as the crime rate is going up and getting more violent and yet it's small town enough to have nothing going on and little to no cultural activity other than going out to one of the many local bars and getting drunk... and I'm not really a big drinker and drug hold no interest for me what so ever.
I've been looking into options for relocating and even brought it up to a friend that occasionally has house share space open... I started to re-do my resume and I made sure the my New York broker's license is still active and ready to go just in case something comes up. New York might not be where I finally end up but at least it's where the majority of my family and friends are and there is a variety of things to do... Until something worthwhile comes up all I can do is get things here ready to go and keep an eye on opportunities as they come up. I hate the limbo and not having a timeline and plan but at least if I'm ready to go when the time comes it'll be easier...
I can't wait, dance class tomorrow and yoga Thursday... at least they'll distract me from the other crap for a whie... too bad Pennsic doesn't happen several times a year, it'd be nice to have an escape more than once a year.
I bought a Power Ball ticket, I know I won't win but on the off chance I get lucky I already have ideas on how to live on 425 million, they include getting out of PA and maybe looking into the west coast... everything I want or like to do happens between California and Washington or from Florida to New York and at this point I'm tried of being alone in PA, yes I have my job but that isn't as great as it used to be.
It seems all the good done by taking a week off and going to Pennsic is being rapidly undone at the office. I'm beginning to think that I may want to start looking for another job as there are things coming up that I'm finding a bit troublesome for my own piece of mind. I genuinely like the people I work with and the job is something that I can do practically asleep but recently there have been a few times where I think that there may be promises made that can come back and bite someone in the ass and I'm not sure I want my name connected with that if it happens. I'm pretty sure the issues are because I have a co-worker that won't allow anyone else to help out and has gotten so far behind that things are being missed and excuses are being made and I'm waiting for something to happen that can't be fixed or smoothed over.
They are talking about another project we need to work on and by we I mean it's getting dumped in my lap because even though they both went out of the country for a few weeks on vacation (Ireland and Australia) and I went camping for a week they have it timed so I'll be in the office and working on it and someone will be off at the beach... hint it's not me. I also seem to have not gotten a raise again... but at least I still have health insurance, I get told almost yearly that I would have gotten a raise but the insurance premiums went up... and really as much as a raise would be nice I do like having health care coverage. I think worrying is getting to be the least of my concerns as I'm starting to get angry that I give and give and take care of everything and some days it feels like I'm being taken advantage of... it used to feel like family and I miss that, it was the only reason I stayed and didn't move back to New York as soon as D and I split, I didn't want to leave them short handed. They treated me well and appreciated me, now it's hit or miss on any given day whether or not it's going to be a decent day or if someone is going to have a bug up their ass and take it out on me since I'm the only non-family member that works there.
If I start looking like I may leave they get all sweet again but it doesn't last... I've been there 12 years and it's getting to feel like a chore. There are some times I think that maybe I should pack up and take a shot anywhere else... I also think my chances of finding a romantic partner might increase if I moved someplace that was more urban and open minded, I like country living but this isn't it... I have the worst of it all, it's populated enough to have a pretty rampant drug and alcohol issue as well as the crime rate is going up and getting more violent and yet it's small town enough to have nothing going on and little to no cultural activity other than going out to one of the many local bars and getting drunk... and I'm not really a big drinker and drug hold no interest for me what so ever.
I've been looking into options for relocating and even brought it up to a friend that occasionally has house share space open... I started to re-do my resume and I made sure the my New York broker's license is still active and ready to go just in case something comes up. New York might not be where I finally end up but at least it's where the majority of my family and friends are and there is a variety of things to do... Until something worthwhile comes up all I can do is get things here ready to go and keep an eye on opportunities as they come up. I hate the limbo and not having a timeline and plan but at least if I'm ready to go when the time comes it'll be easier...
I can't wait, dance class tomorrow and yoga Thursday... at least they'll distract me from the other crap for a whie... too bad Pennsic doesn't happen several times a year, it'd be nice to have an escape more than once a year.