( verseless ) || ❝ you're far too young and the best is yet to come. ❞

[notanemptymotto]

[ Things had not gone as well as she had hoped with Will, but, she hardly expected more than what she received. Helen knew the moment she made the choice about how to save Abby that it would cause a divide between her and her protege. From her eyes? It had to be done that way. There was no other way to save Abby. It was either make a choice that

Comments

[amazing_spidey]

She'll probably feel weird doing it, now. I would. [If he'd been in her place, he knows he wouldn't be able to comfortably sing in front of anyone for quite some time. Still, she's right, and Helen does give herself credit where it's due. It's something Peter admires about her. She knows her strengths and isn't shy about them, but she also knows her weaknesses and keeps them heavily guarded. It's something he hopes to be able to do, too, as he gets more accustomed to the responsibilities he has as Spider-Man.

He nods a little bit, at least understanding Will's side of things too, but he knows something had to be done. If they left that thing -- Peter wasn't sure what it was -- inside her, she'd die eventually, and at least this way it gave her a fighting chance.] I guess I understand why he's mad, but I still think it was the right call.

[The mention of Gwen, however, knocks him off his mental footing and he frowns to himself, thinking about the mistakes he's already made, the people he lost.] ...If it was a choice between losing her and giving her a chance to fight back, I'd make sure she got to fight with everything she has, even with the risks. I wouldn't just say no because it's dangerous.

[notanemptymotto]

Most likely. Although, Abby is incredibly strong. She doesn't let things keep her down for too long. The perfect kind of person for Will. [ Where as Will kept himself down more than she did. He's been healing since he started working at the Sanctuary. Finding conclusions and wants to find closure. It's something she hopes that Peter can find in the Sanctuary as well.

Helen could explain to him what the Hollow Earth Abnormal was, but, she doubts that he'd be interested. She has noticed how he stays out of Sanctuary business, and hopes that one day he'll feel comfortable enough joining them. Except, she does know that Peter has his own path to follow with the gifts he has. The most she can do for him is give him a place to come home to at night and cover up whatever medical or scientific data he has. Especially from Oscorp. ]

You're a very brave young man, Peter. That's what makes you unique. Not just your "spider powers."

[amazing_spidey]

Yeah, they're kind of perfect together. [Peter wonders if he and Gwen are the same, but he's not sure he's even half close to looking at this so seriously. He's too young to get himself tied down to even Gwen, but he does care about her so deeply he's willing to break the promise he made, even if it feels horrible deep down to do that. He just can't stay away from her. She's something unique, something he can't quite figure out.

Giving Helen a childishly large grin, Peter chuckles a bit, shrugging to himself.] I just do what I have to do. I have a... a moral obligation to do good wherever I can. If I don't, if I do nothing at all, then I'm just as bad as the people who actively do bad things.

[He wonders if he'll ever get used to everything, but if he does, then he's settled and that's a dangerous place to be. He just wants to make everything right.]

[notanemptymotto]

[ From her point of view? Helen definitely sees the potential for Peter and Gwen. As far as she can tell, Gwen is his first true love. She's glad that he's found it so young, compared to herself or Will who had to wait considerably longer. Hopefully the two of them will be able to stay with one another, despite the hardships around them. She never wants to see any relationship end like how hers did.

She nudges him gently with her elbow. ] You are remarkable. You simply just don't see it yet. It's not just a duty, it's who you are. It's rare to find people like you who want to help simply because they want to. It's why you would make a lovely edition to the Sanctuary team. If you ever needed employment outside of being Spider-Man.

[amazing_spidey]

[Peter gives Helen a sheepish smile, looking away almost embarrassedly. He wishes he had on the mask. It'd be so much easier to handle this kind of conversation, but he nods a little bit and worries his fingers against the sheets on his bed.] When I need a job, I know who to call first.

[He's not sure he's remarkable. Maybe he's able to good for other people, but he knows he's nothing without the abilities he's been given. He couldn't do half the things he has without them. He's smart, but he couldn't change things, he couldn't make waves in his personal life or his life as a "vigilante" or now a "hero" if he didn't have Spider-Man, in every sense of what Spider-Man is; the powers, the mask, all of it gives him great responsibilities that he has to live up to, after all the grave mistakes he's made.

Biting his lip again, he can't help the tears that come to his eyes as he tries to hold in what comes out anyway, in a quiet, watery voice.] Can't help everyone, though, right?

[notanemptymotto]

Good. I'll be waiting.

[ Her expression falls as his does, and at his question, she closes her eyes and lowers her head slightly. Will had made the same point. Not everyone could be saved. Helen does her damnedest to fight for lives. It doesn't always work. She's lost her father, her daughter, and her best friend in the fight to keep abnormals safe. She's given five lifetimes to it, but that still doesn't bring back the people she's lost. Being Spider-Man won't bring back those people for Peter either, and it's a fact she is sure both of them are very much aware of. ]

No. You can't. [ Helen raises her head and moves her hand from his back to his shoulder. ] However, you have to try to help everyone that you can. We make mistakes, Peter. It is part of being human. [ She turns to face him more, putting her other hand over his. ]

When you are extraordinary, people expect you to be able to do extraordinary things. They expect miracles. They want to see suffering end and balance restored to the world. They don't stop to think that event he extraordinary, deep down, are very much ordinary. That is why, when the entire world believes you to more than you are, you need to remember who you are. You have to remember why you are doing what you do.

[ Then she suddenly sits up straight, tilting her head. Her brunette hair falls over her shoulders as she suddenly smiles. ] Have you ever heard of the story of a man named James J. Braddock?

[amazing_spidey]

[Bringing the edge of his sleeve to his mouth the anxiously bite at it, and the end of his thumb, Peter listens to her speak. He knows she's right. He knows he needs to remember who "Peter Parker" is, he needs to remember that all of this started because he wanted to know the answer to that very question; who is Peter Parker? He knows things now he didn't know before, he's made horrific mistakes that cost him hugely, but if he loses sight of who Peter Parker is, he'll lose sight of who Spider-Man is too. They're two parts of one thing, even if Spider-Man was created to avenge his Uncle Ben, and he can't be just one of them now. He has to be everything he's made himself and everything he always was.

He still doesn't want to lose people if he can help it. Just the thought of how little he has left, what he's gained here, he doesn't want to damage any of it, and that's why he fears even getting close to Helen. He doesn't want to be the cause of any pain for her. He can see she's been through plenty already.] Even when people get hurt or killed because of me? It's my fault Gwen's dad and... and Uncle Ben are dead. Sometimes I forget why I'm doing this anymore, besides the fact that... I can help when other people can't. I want to do that, because I can finally do something.

[He sighs a little shakily and looks up at her.] The boxer? Cinderella Man. He was a boxer in like... the thirties, right?

[notanemptymotto]

[ Her hand moves up and down slowly on his shoulder to try and comfort him. Teenage years are always hard, but he has had it so much harder than most she has encountered. A missing mother and father, the loss of a father figure, accidentally setting off a chain of events that ended with the death of his girlfriend's father. Helen knows that his life was far from easy, but, she also knows that the lives with the most trails were the ones that could make it past all those challenges. They are the ones who could stand up and change the world. Either for better or for worse, depending on their choices.

Walls are an easy thing for her to recognize. She has plenty of them herself, but having to live a hundred years without being able to be close to the ones she loved was something that tore her down as it continued. There are still walls and distances, but, she is more willing now to bring people closer. Her long life is still a curse to her in many ways, but, it has given her the opportunity to help people like the young man beside her. ]

Peter, dear, I want you to listen to me. Very closely. [ She waits until she has his attention. ] Their deaths are not your fault. You may have caused the circumstances for it to happen, but you did not kill either of them. That man was the one who decided to pull the gun, and equally, your Uncle was the one who decided to go out into a dangerous neighborhood. Gwen's father was the one who decided to join the fight, and I'm certain he knew what could happen. D.r Conner's was the one who decided to turn himself into what he was. You may create the scenarios, Peter, but what happens is not your fault. You cannot control what others chose, only influence. And I highly doubt that you would influence either side to make the choices that they did.

[ And then she sighed, squaring her shoulders. ] That's right. I'm impressed you know of him.

[amazing_spidey]

[He lifts his gaze as she tells him to listen very closely, and frowns as she speaks, watching her face when she talks to him. She says all the right things, everything he needs to be told. She's honest in the fact that the circumstances surrounding each death and the fate of Dr. Connors are because of him, but the deaths themselves are not his fault. He didn't pull the trigger on Uncle Ben, he didn't stab Captain Stacy with Lizard's claws, he didn't make Curtis Connors keep using the formula they'd made. He just caused events that allowed these things to happen. It doesn't stop the pain but it puts it in better perspective and he can't help himself as he reaches to give her a quick hug.]

Thanks, Momma Bear. [She sets him at ease in the same way Aunt May does. She makes him feel cared for, like someone out there would worry if he was gone for too long. He knows he takes both his aunt and Helen for granted but he loves both of them. Helen has been nothing but amazing to him.

Still, he sits back and rubs at his eyes, nodding to her.] Famous New York boxer. Uncle Ben told me about him when I was a kid. I don't remember much, just his name and stuff.

[notanemptymotto]

[ Helen nods in reply. She does realize the hypocrisy in many of the things she's said. She is like Peter. While the circumstances were caused by her that nearly crippled the Sanctuary Network, that caused Ashley's death? Helen blames herself. If she hadn't of let Ashley go, then it could have been avoided. She raises her hands to give him a comforting hug, rubbing his back gently. Even if he does have his Aunt, she feels that Peter needs a mother figure in his life. Helen doesn't mind being one, but she'll never offer the spot. It is a choice that she will leave up to him and will accept whatever he wants with a smile. ]

You're welcome.

[ She gently pats his hair down. ] He was a very famous boxer. I didn't have the chance to meet him until after World War II, but, he inspired hope in people. Just as you do. James had hit an all time low in his career during the height of the depression. He worked the docks, but, it was hard to find work even there. He went back to boxing and became successful again. I remember hearing an interview with him before the title ship match.

James was asked why he fought. The answer he gave was a very simple one: "I fight for milk."

[amazing_spidey]

[Peter will never admit that he likes the way she pets his head, and still he will never admit that he needs a mother figure, even if he knows it deep inside. He is still very young, doing things even adults shouldn't have to do, but he does them because he has the strength and the power to do so, and therefore the responsibility, but he does them because he wants to as well. He wants to help, the make things right, to do good where good can be done, even if his mistakes have been painful milestones in his growth into Spider-Man.

Listening to her story about the boxer, he understands what she means once he gets past the surprise of her knowing the man himself. He knows what she's trying to tell him, and he nods a little bit to her.] I guess I fight for eggs. [He gives an awkward shrug and a quick flash of a toothy grin before stretching a bit.] You really know what to say to make me feel better.

[notanemptymotto]

[ They are both the type of people who have the hard lives and the hard to decisions to make because they can shoulder that weight. There are always few who have to make those choices, but they are always needed. She wishes that Peter didn't have to. He's still so young and already handed a destiny. At least she was a grown adult, even if she always knew she would be involved in her father's work. She wanted to be. It is why she chose to be a doctor in the first place - because of her father. She may never say it, but she and Peter are more alike than he knows. It's partially the reason why she's so adamant in helping him. ]

I would say that's accurate. [ Helen smiles at him fondly in return. ] I've been around the block a few times. I like to think I know how to cheer someone up.