Ever?
Ever sit and wonder why things work the way they do? For instance, how one feels. It's completely surroundings based. If the surroundings are excellent, then chances are the person is going to be in a fairly good mood, however if you flip that and make the surroundings quite terrible and upsetting. You get a range of emotions from anger to saddness, to depending on what the surroundings are and the situation is some little freak may be off over in a corner completely extatic that things are falling apart for someone else that they may know. Now having read this some of you maybe agreeing with me, some of you could possibly be shaking your heads saying to yourself, no that's not the way it works. Fortunatly for you, both parties would be correct. To some extent I am correct, and to some extent I am wrong. Now lets move along to what would you do if you walked upon someone or a friend sitting in your class room, regardless of wether you were a teacher or a student, or just some lost person wandering around. Would you, ask the person what is wrong, and offer some assistance as to help them out, or would you just pass by thinking someone else will ask, I don't have to, or there is no need for me too, or the ever famous it's none of my business.. True it maybe none of your business, however you have one single human in a room, that is quite simply bawling they're eyes out, and humans being mostly curious, you are prolly wondering why? So you being the polite gentleman or woman you are walk over and ask what's wrong and is there anything you can do to help them.. Then in turn tell you that nothing is wrong, everything is fine, and not to worry. Now take a moment and think on what they just said to you. Run through the course of your life, your feelings, and others feelings you've come across. How many instances have you actually came across someone bawling they're eyes out, or has that looming look of glum and depression upon they're face, and they or yourself for better instance, say nothing is wrong, everything is fine, nothing to worry about, when in actuaility there is evidently something wrong, everything isn't fine, and somebody has something to worry about. I'm going to take a small guess and say it hasn't happened very many times at all, if any.. By this point you're wondering why you ever walked over to ask what's wrong, thinking you should have just stayed in your chair and kept to yourself. However I would have to honestly disagree with you. You at this point have quite a few options, but I'll list to for the arguments sake. 1. Turn around and walk away. or 2. Press the matter further. However your thinking if you press the matter further, they will think of you as nosey and pushy. This is possibly true, however one must learn to do so in a non nosey and non pushy way. How, well that's up to you.. You know yourself better than anyone else out there. You surely can figure out how to correctly phrase a question to find out what you want. HA, you have it. So you ask your question that you have in mind, and just slightly does the person open up. Giving you a direct insight as to whats wrong or perhaps a small hint. Now depending on how your mind inturrpurets this insight or hint, well that's another story, however generally speaking. Most people will tell you what is wrong with them, in the first few sentances of a conversation upon opening up. Only if you'll just listen, and take to mind what they are saying and attempt to figure it out. By this time you realize that class is over, and you've completely missed out on the assignement, as well as what the professor could have been talking about. Thank goodness for voice recorders and such. ;-) As you walking out of the classroom the person/friend walks past you, turning to say thank you. Now your wondering excatly what you did that made them say thank you. All you did was ask what was bothering them, didn't really give them any advise on how to handle what may be bothering them. However you did two things, 1. You actually took the time to ask. and 2. They spoke just a little of what was bothering them. Even if it was just a 6 word sentance. Essentially what this is trying to tell you is not to give up on people that you may or may not be that well aquainted with. Always try to help out a friend, even if it does mean missing an hours worth of class notes. The reward? No you generally don't get any money for it, nor anything else. Just the satisfaction that you've attempted to help someone out by simply asking a question.
More.......
The past week I've been asked by several people on a daily basis, many times a day what's bothering me, what's on my mind, why do I look so depressed.. My answer is always the same, I'm fine. Most people take that very unhappily, and walk away with it. Not pressing the issue any further. However those that do press the issue further are met with I'll be alright, or no worries... That as well they take very unhappily and go back to what they were previously doing, or move one to other things. The problem with that is, that everyone asks, and I greatly appreate it, however they aren't asking the right questions. And it's not like these are complete strangers that are asking, they are people that have known me for quite sometime. They know when something is wrong, or isn't going right for me. I don't understand, if they take the innation to ask, and they obviously want to know, why they take nothing and walk away with it. Am I mad or upset at them for not pressing the issue further? No, not at all. Am I mad or upset with them for even asking? Again, no, not at all. However, If one were to properly phrase a question they may or may not get more than they asked for........
In closing, the first section of this writing I have to admit has happened to me more than I care to admit. I've been met with alot of reactions, from complete and udder rudeness to 3 hour long conversations just to find out that someones puppy had ran away. As for the second section, there have been a few people to ask my why I don't openly talk about what's wrong. The way I look at it is.. I will talk about just about anything. However when it comes to my feelings and laying them on someone elses shoulder, I don't want to be met a week later with a message, email, or phone call saying... I'm still upset about what you told me the other day. If someone acutally takes the time, puts in the effort to find out whats wrong with someone else, then they have no one to blame but themselves. And yes before you ask (comment) it has happened to me more times than I care to imagine, on both ends of the spectrum.....
~W
More.......
The past week I've been asked by several people on a daily basis, many times a day what's bothering me, what's on my mind, why do I look so depressed.. My answer is always the same, I'm fine. Most people take that very unhappily, and walk away with it. Not pressing the issue any further. However those that do press the issue further are met with I'll be alright, or no worries... That as well they take very unhappily and go back to what they were previously doing, or move one to other things. The problem with that is, that everyone asks, and I greatly appreate it, however they aren't asking the right questions. And it's not like these are complete strangers that are asking, they are people that have known me for quite sometime. They know when something is wrong, or isn't going right for me. I don't understand, if they take the innation to ask, and they obviously want to know, why they take nothing and walk away with it. Am I mad or upset at them for not pressing the issue further? No, not at all. Am I mad or upset with them for even asking? Again, no, not at all. However, If one were to properly phrase a question they may or may not get more than they asked for........
In closing, the first section of this writing I have to admit has happened to me more than I care to admit. I've been met with alot of reactions, from complete and udder rudeness to 3 hour long conversations just to find out that someones puppy had ran away. As for the second section, there have been a few people to ask my why I don't openly talk about what's wrong. The way I look at it is.. I will talk about just about anything. However when it comes to my feelings and laying them on someone elses shoulder, I don't want to be met a week later with a message, email, or phone call saying... I'm still upset about what you told me the other day. If someone acutally takes the time, puts in the effort to find out whats wrong with someone else, then they have no one to blame but themselves. And yes before you ask (comment) it has happened to me more times than I care to imagine, on both ends of the spectrum.....
~W