Lengthy review of "Zombies vs Unicorns", edited by Holly Black and Justine Larbalestier
"Zombies vs Unicorns", edited by Holly Black and Justine Larbalestier
I am:
I am familiar with a lot of these authors. I have some of their books on my waiting-to-be-read pile, and most of them are on Team Zombie.
My friend freedomsbullets told me about the book after I mentioned I read "The Name of the Star," by Maureen Johnson.
So it seems from the intro of the book that this all started in February 2007 when Holly Black (Team Unicorn) and Justine Larbalestier (Team Zombie) began a debate about the creatures on Justine's blog. From there it grew and became this anthology of short stories.
While I prefer unicorns (I just love any magical creature that looks like a horse i.e. unicorns, pegasus, My Little Pony, centaurs, etc.), I really feel it is the quality of the author's writing that makes the story. There can be awesome and crappy unicorn stories as well as awesome and crappy zombie stories. Regardless of the creature involved, it's all up to how the author tells the story.
I'll go in the order they were printed.
"The Highest Justice", by Garth Nix. Not familiar with this author. Nor did I like this story much. It was kind of forgettable. And it was sort of a mash up of a unicorn and a zombie story. Good news is, it all gets better from here.
"Love Will Tear Us Apart", by Alaya Dawn Johnson
I really liked this story. It's a dark-humorous, forbidden love story between two boys in high school. Jack's father is training him to kill zombies, but he and Grayson (the zombie) have fallen in love. Aww. And they both love the band Joy Division.
Page 35- My thoughts exactly, Grayson! MTE. Why do you get away with this? Why don't they ever listen to adults? Don't go anywhere with strangers!
Page 42- I learned a lot about Joy Division in this small section and will forever hear this song differently:
"Purity Test", by Naomi Novik
I loved this story. It was so funny, and the unicorn's wit and sarcasm matched with Alison's is perfect. Plus, contrary to the old fashioned/traditional unicorn stories, it shows you don't have to be a virgin to be able to see and help out a unicorn.
And a super plus for the pop-culture references:
Page 53 - Funny enough, I was thinking Voldemort as soon as the unicorn mentioned a wizard was stealing baby unicorns. LOL
Page 64 - F-yea Princess Leia gets a mention!
Page 56 LOL at cats being social climbers
Page 58 Be very careful with your wording when dealing with Goblins. Harry Potter learned that the hard way.
"Bougainvillea", by Carrie Ryan. I actually have her zombie trilogy (The Forest of Hands and Teeth) on my waiting to read pile.
I believe this one is my favorite of the zombie stories. They way she wrote it is chilling; telling us about Iza's world before The Return (what a scary name for the zombie apocalypse!) and then her life in the present, cut off from the rest of the world and living under her father's dictatorship.
Page 99, I could see this happening on social networks:
Page 105, I love this last paragraph. Kind of made my heart melt.
I love that Iza killed that pirate instead of becoming his puppet. She can take care of herself!
"A Thousand Flowers", by Margo Lanagan
This story was ok. I was not down with the bestiality, or with the man getting falsely accused and murdered for raping the princess when it was the unicorn she conceived a child with. Yea, it way too out there. Plus the story changes between 3 different character points of view and that was even more of a mind warp. And between those 3 points of view, not one is from the princess' or unicorn's perspective. Maybe then I would have understood it better.
Just incase Justine Larbalestier ever comes across this I want to say I know so far there are 2 unicorn stories I have not liked, but I don't think that reflects badly on the unicorns. I think it is the writers. I feel even if they were zombie stories I would not have liked them because I did not like the plot nor the prose.
"The Children of the Revolution", by Maureen Johnson.
A famous actress, with tattoos and adopts children from around the world, and is rumored to collect blood? Ok I was totally picturing Angelina Jolie! LOL
This story was scary, crazy, funny and so f-ed up.
OMG, when Sofie opened the gate to let the zombie kids out I DID NOT WANT TO READ ANYMORE! That is it. You are a zombie and a prisoner of your own mind and a prisoner in Angelina-like-actress's manor.
Not to mention turning on that food conveyer belt to distract them was not the best idea either. They were expecting to nom-nom-nom on something.
"The Care and Feeding of Your Baby Killer Unicorn", by Diana Peterfreund.
BEST.STORY.IN.THE.BOOK. A total page turner. And when it ended I was like, "Where is the rest of the story!!?? It only just the first chapter! I want more! GIVE ME MORE!"
Ok I have to remember this. Diana Peterfreund has written 4 books in the Ivy League series, as well as Rampant and Ascendant.
I just loved Wendy's internal struggle. Her parents are these religious fanatics (think of the mother in Stephen King's Carrie meets the magic-hating Uncle Vernon and Aunt Petunia in Harry Potter) who coddle her in the most annoying ways, and she also hears the call of this baby unicorn who she grows to love and protect.
"Inoculata", by Scott Westerfeld.
This is my second favorite zombie story. It's post-zombie-apocalyptic and about immunity and evolving to carry the infection. So you are sort of a zombie, but still alive. It's mentioned that they become more attractive, which reminded me of vampires actually.
Anyway, I really liked the prose and the relationships between the characters. It felt authentic and true. I also liked the way it left off, with them driving off in the night.
"Princess Prettypants", by Meg Cabot.
My second favorite story in the book. I have never read anything by Meg Cabot, but I know her books are best sellers. You know what I love about this story? Not only is it funny because Cabot has a love of irony with the silly rainbows and such, but there is SWEET, SWEET justice in the end. Everything you ever want to do to bullies and creeps in high school, gets done. Oh YEA!
Breaking the mold once more, Liz, who owns Princess Prettypants, is not a virgin.
Ok before I get to the story, I know I don't know Justine personally so perhaps it is unfair to judge her, but I really can't stand her. I like some of the zombie stories, but I can't stomach the immaturity of Justine.
It's like she has no better way of defending her zombies so she resorts to bitter sarcasm and name calling (Team Wrong? I pity you for your immaturity). It's like a politician during a campaign. You're not confident in the Team Zombie stories so you resort to lies. (You're just jealous that Meg Cabot's story is awesome.)
Ok, back to my favorite parts of "Princess Prettypants".
Page 303 - LOL people with their cell phones. I can so see this all over twitter and youtube.
http://i829.photobucket.com/albums/zz216/PennilessPoet81/Book%20covers/IMG_9555.jpg
Page 312 - I would love to say this to someone, "My unicorn is going to smash your face." LOL
Page 314 - ROTFLMAO "You have one twisted unicorn." Oh I want to use that in real life somehow!
"Cold Hands", by Cassandra Clare
And once again she is an immature 4 year old. (In a baby voice) "Admit that Team Zombie won." Oh grow up.
You know Justine, a story doesn't have to be a love story to be good. I have read some really great stories that were not love stories.
Where was I? So, this story was just ok. I say that because although the prose wasn't bad, I don't like it for the same reason I didn't like "A Thousand Flowers". Instead of bestiality, it's necrophilia. I like that these zombie existed because of a curse. It made it stand out from all the others where it was caused by an infection.
However, the living girl agrees to marry her dead boyfriend. Ewww. It is not the same boy she once loved. Will they one day have half-dead babies? Ewww.
I do have Cassandra Clare's The Mortal Instruments and The Infernal Devices waiting to be read. There is also controversy around her books over plagiarism. Apparently I have read that she "borrowed" at lot from her own Draco Malfoy fan fiction and from Harry Potter too.
"The Third Virgin", by Kathleen Duey
This was such a sad, disturbing, and lonely story. The unicorn has no friends, no family, can't die/heals quickly, and is addicted to taking years off someone's life in order to cure them. Then the unicorn feels guilty, which becomes a whole drug addict analogy.
The whole virgin thing is not the usual meaning of the word. It just means someone who is pure of heart. (Made me think of Britney on Glee. She slept with half the school but still believed in magical creatures, like unicorns.)
Page 356- I really liked this part in an odd way. The unicorn wants to confess to someone because the guilt is eating its soul.
It also occurred to me that one can easily replace the unicorn with a psychotic-serial killer human.
Page 358- The envy of other creatures. I feel like this story is about the 7 Deadly Sins.
I thought the story was well done.
This is what Justine had to say about it:
Justine, you are a massive whinger. And maybe there should be a zombie who thinks about the cost and consequences.
"Prom Night", by Libba Bray.
I got an exclusive preview of Bray's The Diviners at SDCC this past summer. It was pretty good and I think I heard it is being turned into a movie.
Yea, Justine, you have said QUITE enough on the subject so you can shut-up now. I don't need you to tell me which stories I should be enjoying. Nor did I torture myself with the unicorn stories.
And you can forget about that zombie movie festival. I'll be reading The Night Circus instead.
I really liked "Prom Night", and NOT because Justine said I should. No, I liked it because it was well written. The descriptions painted a perfect picture of the aftermath after a few months of widespread infection. Also had a Lord of the Flies feel to it with the kids being in charge. It is also heart breaking that the parents who always promised to be there and protect their kids then turned on them. (My heart broke for Tahmina when she was thinking about her mother.)
I really liked how it was told from the older teens perspective, the ones trying to maintain the law, keep order, and keep the infection from spreading. One of them is Tahmina's friend and partner, Jeff, the comic relief. When (or if) things get back to normal he wants to make a TV reality cop show based on their experiences. It would make for great TV he says. LOL. He's not wrong. "Cops" and "The Walking Dead" were/are very popular.
Anyway, here is one of my favorite parts that show what the state of their world is in. :(
This is another story that should be expanded into a full novel. I'd read it.
So to sum it up, I really enjoyed many of these stories and would like to thank freedomsbullets for recommending it. :)
5 out of 5 Zombies riding Unicorns over the rainbow.
I am:
I am familiar with a lot of these authors. I have some of their books on my waiting-to-be-read pile, and most of them are on Team Zombie.
My friend freedomsbullets told me about the book after I mentioned I read "The Name of the Star," by Maureen Johnson.
So it seems from the intro of the book that this all started in February 2007 when Holly Black (Team Unicorn) and Justine Larbalestier (Team Zombie) began a debate about the creatures on Justine's blog. From there it grew and became this anthology of short stories.
While I prefer unicorns (I just love any magical creature that looks like a horse i.e. unicorns, pegasus, My Little Pony, centaurs, etc.), I really feel it is the quality of the author's writing that makes the story. There can be awesome and crappy unicorn stories as well as awesome and crappy zombie stories. Regardless of the creature involved, it's all up to how the author tells the story.
I'll go in the order they were printed.
"The Highest Justice", by Garth Nix. Not familiar with this author. Nor did I like this story much. It was kind of forgettable. And it was sort of a mash up of a unicorn and a zombie story. Good news is, it all gets better from here.
"Love Will Tear Us Apart", by Alaya Dawn Johnson
I really liked this story. It's a dark-humorous, forbidden love story between two boys in high school. Jack's father is training him to kill zombies, but he and Grayson (the zombie) have fallen in love. Aww. And they both love the band Joy Division.
Page 35- My thoughts exactly, Grayson! MTE. Why do you get away with this? Why don't they ever listen to adults? Don't go anywhere with strangers!
Page 42- I learned a lot about Joy Division in this small section and will forever hear this song differently:
"Purity Test", by Naomi Novik
I loved this story. It was so funny, and the unicorn's wit and sarcasm matched with Alison's is perfect. Plus, contrary to the old fashioned/traditional unicorn stories, it shows you don't have to be a virgin to be able to see and help out a unicorn.
And a super plus for the pop-culture references:
Page 53 - Funny enough, I was thinking Voldemort as soon as the unicorn mentioned a wizard was stealing baby unicorns. LOL
Page 64 - F-yea Princess Leia gets a mention!
Page 56 LOL at cats being social climbers
Page 58 Be very careful with your wording when dealing with Goblins. Harry Potter learned that the hard way.
"Bougainvillea", by Carrie Ryan. I actually have her zombie trilogy (The Forest of Hands and Teeth) on my waiting to read pile.
I believe this one is my favorite of the zombie stories. They way she wrote it is chilling; telling us about Iza's world before The Return (what a scary name for the zombie apocalypse!) and then her life in the present, cut off from the rest of the world and living under her father's dictatorship.
Page 99, I could see this happening on social networks:
Page 105, I love this last paragraph. Kind of made my heart melt.
I love that Iza killed that pirate instead of becoming his puppet. She can take care of herself!
"A Thousand Flowers", by Margo Lanagan
This story was ok. I was not down with the bestiality, or with the man getting falsely accused and murdered for raping the princess when it was the unicorn she conceived a child with. Yea, it way too out there. Plus the story changes between 3 different character points of view and that was even more of a mind warp. And between those 3 points of view, not one is from the princess' or unicorn's perspective. Maybe then I would have understood it better.
Just incase Justine Larbalestier ever comes across this I want to say I know so far there are 2 unicorn stories I have not liked, but I don't think that reflects badly on the unicorns. I think it is the writers. I feel even if they were zombie stories I would not have liked them because I did not like the plot nor the prose.
"The Children of the Revolution", by Maureen Johnson.
A famous actress, with tattoos and adopts children from around the world, and is rumored to collect blood? Ok I was totally picturing Angelina Jolie! LOL
This story was scary, crazy, funny and so f-ed up.
OMG, when Sofie opened the gate to let the zombie kids out I DID NOT WANT TO READ ANYMORE! That is it. You are a zombie and a prisoner of your own mind and a prisoner in Angelina-like-actress's manor.
Not to mention turning on that food conveyer belt to distract them was not the best idea either. They were expecting to nom-nom-nom on something.
"The Care and Feeding of Your Baby Killer Unicorn", by Diana Peterfreund.
BEST.STORY.IN.THE.BOOK. A total page turner. And when it ended I was like, "Where is the rest of the story!!?? It only just the first chapter! I want more! GIVE ME MORE!"
Ok I have to remember this. Diana Peterfreund has written 4 books in the Ivy League series, as well as Rampant and Ascendant.
I just loved Wendy's internal struggle. Her parents are these religious fanatics (think of the mother in Stephen King's Carrie meets the magic-hating Uncle Vernon and Aunt Petunia in Harry Potter) who coddle her in the most annoying ways, and she also hears the call of this baby unicorn who she grows to love and protect.
"Inoculata", by Scott Westerfeld.
This is my second favorite zombie story. It's post-zombie-apocalyptic and about immunity and evolving to carry the infection. So you are sort of a zombie, but still alive. It's mentioned that they become more attractive, which reminded me of vampires actually.
Anyway, I really liked the prose and the relationships between the characters. It felt authentic and true. I also liked the way it left off, with them driving off in the night.
"Princess Prettypants", by Meg Cabot.
My second favorite story in the book. I have never read anything by Meg Cabot, but I know her books are best sellers. You know what I love about this story? Not only is it funny because Cabot has a love of irony with the silly rainbows and such, but there is SWEET, SWEET justice in the end. Everything you ever want to do to bullies and creeps in high school, gets done. Oh YEA!
Breaking the mold once more, Liz, who owns Princess Prettypants, is not a virgin.
Ok before I get to the story, I know I don't know Justine personally so perhaps it is unfair to judge her, but I really can't stand her. I like some of the zombie stories, but I can't stomach the immaturity of Justine.
It's like she has no better way of defending her zombies so she resorts to bitter sarcasm and name calling (Team Wrong? I pity you for your immaturity). It's like a politician during a campaign. You're not confident in the Team Zombie stories so you resort to lies. (You're just jealous that Meg Cabot's story is awesome.)
Ok, back to my favorite parts of "Princess Prettypants".
Page 303 - LOL people with their cell phones. I can so see this all over twitter and youtube.
http://i829.photobucket.com/albums/zz216/PennilessPoet81/Book%20covers/IMG_9555.jpg
Page 312 - I would love to say this to someone, "My unicorn is going to smash your face." LOL
Page 314 - ROTFLMAO "You have one twisted unicorn." Oh I want to use that in real life somehow!
"Cold Hands", by Cassandra Clare
And once again she is an immature 4 year old. (In a baby voice) "Admit that Team Zombie won." Oh grow up.
You know Justine, a story doesn't have to be a love story to be good. I have read some really great stories that were not love stories.
Where was I? So, this story was just ok. I say that because although the prose wasn't bad, I don't like it for the same reason I didn't like "A Thousand Flowers". Instead of bestiality, it's necrophilia. I like that these zombie existed because of a curse. It made it stand out from all the others where it was caused by an infection.
However, the living girl agrees to marry her dead boyfriend. Ewww. It is not the same boy she once loved. Will they one day have half-dead babies? Ewww.
I do have Cassandra Clare's The Mortal Instruments and The Infernal Devices waiting to be read. There is also controversy around her books over plagiarism. Apparently I have read that she "borrowed" at lot from her own Draco Malfoy fan fiction and from Harry Potter too.
"The Third Virgin", by Kathleen Duey
This was such a sad, disturbing, and lonely story. The unicorn has no friends, no family, can't die/heals quickly, and is addicted to taking years off someone's life in order to cure them. Then the unicorn feels guilty, which becomes a whole drug addict analogy.
The whole virgin thing is not the usual meaning of the word. It just means someone who is pure of heart. (Made me think of Britney on Glee. She slept with half the school but still believed in magical creatures, like unicorns.)
Page 356- I really liked this part in an odd way. The unicorn wants to confess to someone because the guilt is eating its soul.
It also occurred to me that one can easily replace the unicorn with a psychotic-serial killer human.
Page 358- The envy of other creatures. I feel like this story is about the 7 Deadly Sins.
I thought the story was well done.
This is what Justine had to say about it:
Justine, you are a massive whinger. And maybe there should be a zombie who thinks about the cost and consequences.
"Prom Night", by Libba Bray.
I got an exclusive preview of Bray's The Diviners at SDCC this past summer. It was pretty good and I think I heard it is being turned into a movie.
Yea, Justine, you have said QUITE enough on the subject so you can shut-up now. I don't need you to tell me which stories I should be enjoying. Nor did I torture myself with the unicorn stories.
And you can forget about that zombie movie festival. I'll be reading The Night Circus instead.
I really liked "Prom Night", and NOT because Justine said I should. No, I liked it because it was well written. The descriptions painted a perfect picture of the aftermath after a few months of widespread infection. Also had a Lord of the Flies feel to it with the kids being in charge. It is also heart breaking that the parents who always promised to be there and protect their kids then turned on them. (My heart broke for Tahmina when she was thinking about her mother.)
I really liked how it was told from the older teens perspective, the ones trying to maintain the law, keep order, and keep the infection from spreading. One of them is Tahmina's friend and partner, Jeff, the comic relief. When (or if) things get back to normal he wants to make a TV reality cop show based on their experiences. It would make for great TV he says. LOL. He's not wrong. "Cops" and "The Walking Dead" were/are very popular.
Anyway, here is one of my favorite parts that show what the state of their world is in. :(
This is another story that should be expanded into a full novel. I'd read it.
So to sum it up, I really enjoyed many of these stories and would like to thank freedomsbullets for recommending it. :)
5 out of 5 Zombies riding Unicorns over the rainbow.