New York Trip Update. And a personal rambling
If I don't do it now, I'm just going to keep postponing it and my thoughts will never get posted. So, lets talk about this past weekend, shall we?
Last Friday, I hopped on a plane out to Western New York to go to my best friend's wedding. Actually, it was the reception for the wedding that had occured 3 weeks prior. Long story short, he married his new girlfriend of a year on June 5 in Texas, where they both are at now. Because all of her family still lives in NY, they opted to have the reception there. Now since I wasn't at the wedding (I opted to go to Califur instead, which apparently turns out to have been the better choice), I made my presence at the reception. All in all, it was a good time, and he was really happy that someone out from California was able to be there for him. See, none of his friends or family were there other than myself, so to him, it was a bit bittersweet, but memorable.
The only thing that worries me a little bit is the fact that I was sort of getting the feeling that he wanted to leave his past, here in California, in the wind. Apparently he's having a rough time with his parents lately and it's become an issue with his new family, to a point where he may not even come back to CA at all. I mean, it's not like he promised that he was going to come back... but in all honesty, in a selfish kind of way, it bothers me that I may not see my best friend any more on a regular basis. I know and understand that people develop and create their new chapters of their life all the time, but that doesn't necessarily make it any easier. I dunno... he's the last person that I keep in touch with from my high school days, and ... yeah...
Anywho, for the second part of my trip, I was finally able to meet with a different friend that I have known for several years. It turns out that a furry friend of about 6-7 years lived in the same area, and it was decided that we were going to finally meet up and spend some time together... in the flesh! It turned out to be a really awesome excursion. First, he took me out for some food, and what better things to have in Western New York than some pizza, buffalo wings (OMG, the authentic ones are SO MUCH better than the crap here) and some Loganberry punch (kinda reminded me of Boysenberry punch). Then we went out to check out Niagra Falls, both from the US side and from the Canadian side as well. Then, after spending some time gawking and the falls and putzing around in the casinos on the Canadian side, it was back to my hotel room. I was able to get plenty of pictures of the time out, and it was great to finally meet the person that I have had endless converstaions and gaming sessions with over the internet for so many years. It was awesome.
Now on to more... personal things...
For about the past 3 days or so, I've been in this really bad funk... AGAIN. I've noticed that it sort of comes and goes every couple of months. I get irritable, restless, and just downright ... depressed over silly little things that really don't ever bother me otherwise. Typically it goes away after a couple of days, but this time around it's REALLY hitting me harder than usual, and it's almost starting to worry me. I know the signs of Clinical depression, and I know it's not that, at all. It's just... the general feeling of "meh" that has seem to overcome my well being.
I don't really know how else to put it, but I really think that it all is stemming from my ongoing problem with my views of my self, physically, mostly. See, over the past three years, I have gained an astounding 65lbs, nearly putting me at the 300lb mark. THAT'S SCARY. And now I kind of understand when other fatties claim that the realization of it only seems to make it worse. See, I want to excersise, but either the times that I have access to a gym facility are at times that I cannot go, and also, I'd want to do it with someone, for support, and it would really just make things easier for me too... and... now I'm just making excuses.
Anyway, I just wish that I wasn't in such a negative mood, and that I really had the time to do the fun things that I would like to do with some of my newer friends that I have found as far as the fandom is concerned. I mean, all the people I know, with the exception of a slim handful, are at least a day's drive away, and even the ones that ARE nearby, I only really get to see at cons. I mean, there's plenty to do around here, but my stinking job with it's wacky hours really F with me a lot... and well, we all know how that goes.
Sorry, now I'm just rambling on about things... It's probably better to talk with someone about these things, but I just wanted to get something off my chest for now... But, my AIM, Skype, and Google Talk are always open, just in case anyone out there wants to chew the fat... just sayin',
Last Friday, I hopped on a plane out to Western New York to go to my best friend's wedding. Actually, it was the reception for the wedding that had occured 3 weeks prior. Long story short, he married his new girlfriend of a year on June 5 in Texas, where they both are at now. Because all of her family still lives in NY, they opted to have the reception there. Now since I wasn't at the wedding (I opted to go to Califur instead, which apparently turns out to have been the better choice), I made my presence at the reception. All in all, it was a good time, and he was really happy that someone out from California was able to be there for him. See, none of his friends or family were there other than myself, so to him, it was a bit bittersweet, but memorable.
The only thing that worries me a little bit is the fact that I was sort of getting the feeling that he wanted to leave his past, here in California, in the wind. Apparently he's having a rough time with his parents lately and it's become an issue with his new family, to a point where he may not even come back to CA at all. I mean, it's not like he promised that he was going to come back... but in all honesty, in a selfish kind of way, it bothers me that I may not see my best friend any more on a regular basis. I know and understand that people develop and create their new chapters of their life all the time, but that doesn't necessarily make it any easier. I dunno... he's the last person that I keep in touch with from my high school days, and ... yeah...
Anywho, for the second part of my trip, I was finally able to meet with a different friend that I have known for several years. It turns out that a furry friend of about 6-7 years lived in the same area, and it was decided that we were going to finally meet up and spend some time together... in the flesh! It turned out to be a really awesome excursion. First, he took me out for some food, and what better things to have in Western New York than some pizza, buffalo wings (OMG, the authentic ones are SO MUCH better than the crap here) and some Loganberry punch (kinda reminded me of Boysenberry punch). Then we went out to check out Niagra Falls, both from the US side and from the Canadian side as well. Then, after spending some time gawking and the falls and putzing around in the casinos on the Canadian side, it was back to my hotel room. I was able to get plenty of pictures of the time out, and it was great to finally meet the person that I have had endless converstaions and gaming sessions with over the internet for so many years. It was awesome.
Now on to more... personal things...
For about the past 3 days or so, I've been in this really bad funk... AGAIN. I've noticed that it sort of comes and goes every couple of months. I get irritable, restless, and just downright ... depressed over silly little things that really don't ever bother me otherwise. Typically it goes away after a couple of days, but this time around it's REALLY hitting me harder than usual, and it's almost starting to worry me. I know the signs of Clinical depression, and I know it's not that, at all. It's just... the general feeling of "meh" that has seem to overcome my well being.
I don't really know how else to put it, but I really think that it all is stemming from my ongoing problem with my views of my self, physically, mostly. See, over the past three years, I have gained an astounding 65lbs, nearly putting me at the 300lb mark. THAT'S SCARY. And now I kind of understand when other fatties claim that the realization of it only seems to make it worse. See, I want to excersise, but either the times that I have access to a gym facility are at times that I cannot go, and also, I'd want to do it with someone, for support, and it would really just make things easier for me too... and... now I'm just making excuses.
Anyway, I just wish that I wasn't in such a negative mood, and that I really had the time to do the fun things that I would like to do with some of my newer friends that I have found as far as the fandom is concerned. I mean, all the people I know, with the exception of a slim handful, are at least a day's drive away, and even the ones that ARE nearby, I only really get to see at cons. I mean, there's plenty to do around here, but my stinking job with it's wacky hours really F with me a lot... and well, we all know how that goes.
Sorry, now I'm just rambling on about things... It's probably better to talk with someone about these things, but I just wanted to get something off my chest for now... But, my AIM, Skype, and Google Talk are always open, just in case anyone out there wants to chew the fat... just sayin',