(no subject)
Someone I work with keeps telling me about a friend of his that would be a really good fit for me and how he wants to set me up on a blind date with him and blah-blah-blah-well-suited-blah. What's a polite way of saying OH JESUS CHRIST STAY OUT OF MY PERSONAL LIFE NOT HAVING A SIGNIFICANT OTHER IS NOT THE SAME AS WANTING ONE I JUST WANT TO PLAY WITH MY CAT AND WATCH CRIMINAL MINDS AND THINK ABOUT AND POSSIBLY READ PORN FOR MORGAN AND REID'S BEAUTIFUL LOVE!
I need a beard-boyfriend, so I can claim to have a boyfriend and produce him if challenged and therefore discourage other people from helpfully trying to help me make new orgasm-friends. I think getting a real-fake boyfriend will be much easier than explaining why I don't want to meet anyone's friend/brother/cousin for possible companionship and sexytimes. WHO WANTS TO SET ME UP WITH THEIR MATE TO SEE IF WE WILL MAKE GOOD BEARD-PARTNERS?!
I need a beard-boyfriend, so I can claim to have a boyfriend and produce him if challenged and therefore discourage other people from helpfully trying to help me make new orgasm-friends. I think getting a real-fake boyfriend will be much easier than explaining why I don't want to meet anyone's friend/brother/cousin for possible companionship and sexytimes. WHO WANTS TO SET ME UP WITH THEIR MATE TO SEE IF WE WILL MAKE GOOD BEARD-PARTNERS?!