(no subject)
The moral of this story is that if you ever get the urge to watch the Tribe right after watching Tin Man, you probably shouldn't.
Once upon a time in far-away Kansas/Auckland/whatevs, there lived a brave and beautiful girl whose name was Ellie. Ellie lived on a small farm which she ran with her sister, Alice, and her trusted sidekick, Dal.
One day a tornado came and whisked Ellie and Dal and the farmhouse in which they lived up into the sky. When they landed, it was in a strange and magical place.
"Dal," said Ellie. "I don't think we are in in Kansas/Auckland/whatevs anymore."
"I think you are right, Ellie," said Dal, looking up at her with adoring eyes.
Suddenly, they were surrounded by people in blue robes. "All hail Ellie, the Great Deliverer!" they cried. One of the people in blue robes introduced himself as Loq, and explained that they were the Chosen of Zoot, but their mission to bring power and chaos had been corrupted by the Wicked Guardian of the East, on whom Ellie's farmhouse had landed. All that was left of him were his shiny white cowboy boots, sticking out from under the house.
"Now we are free to bring power and chaos to the world without getting distracted by silly things like burning people at the stake," said Loq. "We owe you a great debt. How can we ever repay you?"
Ellie was going to ask for gold and jewels, but she was a practical girl and realised carrying them on her journey home would be a great effort. So instead she asked for a basket of food and water, which the Chosen were happy to give her.
The Chosen departed to pray and burn down buildings and other Zootlike things. Ellie and Dal prepared to leave also, when there was a burst of bright light, an explosion of sparkles, and Ebony, the Good Witch of the North, appeared.
"I am Ebony, the Good Witch of the North!" she declared grandly.
"Are you sure you're the Good Witch?" asked Ellie. "I didn't think Good Witches wore so much leather."
"Dress codes are for pansies," scoffed Ebony. "Today I am fighting on the Side of Good. Tomorrow it may change, who knows? Anyway, I bet you would like to get back home to Kansas/Auckland/whatevs, am I right?" said Ebony.
"Oh yes," said Ellie. "Very much so!"
"Well, too bad!" said Ebony, the Good Witch of the North, and laughed in a decidedly non-Good-Witch-like way. Ellie felt very sad and started to cry.
"Oh stop that!" said Ebony. "I only meant I cannot send you home with my Good Witch powers. But if you follow the Yellow Brick Road to the Phoenix City Mall, there you will find the Great and Terrible OZ, who may be able to help."
"Oh, thank you!" said Ellie. "I am ever so grateful to you, Good Witch of the North!"
"One more thing," said Ebony. "You had better take the Guardian's shiny white shoes with you. My Good Witch powers tell me they might come in useful."
"I don't think taking shoes from a dead man is a very nice thing to do," said Ellie, doubtfully. "Also, they will not suit me at all."
"I'm sure you will look very beautiful," said Dal, earnestly.
"Look, kid, do you want to go home or not?" said Ebony, who was tired of floating around making sparkles and wanted to go home. "Do as I say and take the damn ugly shoes!"
So Ellie did as she was told and took the damn ugly shoes. They did not go with her outfit at all, but she hoped people would be distracted by her big blue eyes and long blonde hair and not notice too much. Off she went with Dal in search of the Yellow Brick Road.
They had not gone very far when they came across a cornfield that was covered with crows. In the centre of the cornfield stood a very dejected-looking Scarecrow.
"Hey Scarecrow, why so serious?" asked Ellie.
"What?" said the Scarecrow blankly.
"Wrong movie," whispered Dal.
"Oh," said Ellie. "Sorry."
"I am the Scareryan," said Scareryan. "I am sad because my wife is in love with someone else, and only married me because she was pregnant."
"How awful!" said Ellie.
"It is," said Scareryan. "Oh, if only I had a brain, I would have seen it sooner!"
"We are going to the Emerald City to seek out the Great and Terrible OZ," said Ellie. "He may have the power to send me back to Kansas/Auckland/whatevs. Perhaps he could also give you a brain."
"Perhaps..." said Scareryan.
"Come with us!" said Ellie, linking her arm with Scareryans. "We can be friends!"
And off they went in search of the Yellow Brick Road.
They had gone only a little way when they heard shouting in the distance, followed by the sound of running footsteps. Suddenly, a Tin Man burst through the bushes directly into their path.
"Run!" he said, "She has gone quite mad!"
"Who has gone mad?" asked Dal.
"My wife," said the Tin Man. "I told her I only married her for sex, and she went crazy and started throwing things at me. I have to wear this armour to protect my beautiful face from damage! By the way, those shoes are really ugly."
"I am not suprised she threw things at you," said Ellie sternly. "What a horrible thing to say! You must be quite heartless."
"We are going to the Emerald City to seek out the Great and Terrible OZ," said Scareryan. "Ellie and Dal want to go back to Kansas/Auckland/whatevs, and I am going to ask for a brain. Perhaps if you come with us, he can give you a heart."
"Yes," said the Tin Man. "Oh, if only I had a heart, maybe I would stop pulling stunts like this."
"Is that likely?" asked Dal.
"Probably not," said the Tin Man. "But I can't go home until she's calmed down anyway, so I might as well go with you. My name is Tin Lex, by the way,"
Ellie tried to link arms with Tin Lex, but after he groped her a couple of times, she changed her mind and decided to keep her distance.
Off they went once more in search of the Yellow Brick Road
They had been walking for some time when suddenly, a scary Lion leapt from the bushes in front of them.
"Roar!" said the scary Lion, "I am the Jack Lion, thith ith my territory and you may not path unleth you give me back my copper wire!"
There was a long silence.
"Pardon?" said Ellie eventually.
"You may not path!"
"What?" said Dal.
"Give me my copper wireth!"
The travellers exchanged glances.
"I don't understand what he's saying," said Scareryan. "Perhaps it is because I do not have a brain."
"I don't understand what he's saying because he lisps," said Tin Lex. "I can make fun of people with speech impediments because I don't have a heart."
"Copper wireth!" said the scary Jack Lion. "I know you thtole it, Tin Leckth, and I want it back!" Then he added "Roar!" as an afterthought.
"Oh," said Tin Lex. "Well, I gave it to my wife, who isn't speaking to me right now because she found out I only married her so she'd sleep with me, so you can't have it."
"You thuck," said the Jack Lion. "Theriouthly, you completely thuck. Now I am going to eat you all ath a delithiouth thnack!"
"Oh no!" cried Ellie, flinging up her arms in horror.
The Jack Lion prepared to charge, but suddenly Dal ran up to him and slapped him across the face.
"Knock it off, Jack Lion," said Dal crossly. "We have to get to the Emerald City and you are slowing us down with your tantrums."
"Ow!" said the Jack Lion indignantly. "What wath that for?"
"You said you'd eat us," said Ellie. "That's not very friendly."
"I wathn't really going to eat you," said the Jack Lion. "I only thaid that tho you'd leave before Tin Leckth thtealth any more of my thtuff. I am a thcientitht, but I can't invent thingth if people keep taking my toolth."
"Poor Jack Lion," said Ellie, and her heart melted. "It must be so terrible for you,"
"Yeth," said the Jack Lion sadly. "If only I wath braver and could thtand up for mythelf."
Tin Lex snorted. Ellie glared at him.
"Shut up, Tin Leckth- I mean, Lex. You really are heartless! Jack Lion, we are going to the Emerald City so that Dal and I can go home to Kansas/Auckland/whatevs, and Scareryan can get a brain and Tin Lex can get a heart. Maybe if you come with us, he can give you some courage."
"Or some speech therapy," muttered Tin Lex, but the Jack Lion was so entranced by Ellie's beauty that he didn't hear, and it was a good thing too.
On they went, and soon they came to a deep, dark forest.
"I hear there are dreadful beathts in thethe woodth," said the Jack Lion nervously, and he began to tremble at the very thought. "All kindth of nightmareith creatureth!"
"Like what?" asked Ellie, clinging to the Jack Lion's magnificently spiky orange mane.
"Like Locos, and Demon Dogs, and Tribe Circus," said Tin Lex.
"Oh my!" said Scareryan.
But the only way to the Yellow Brick Road was through those woods, and so in they went. Soon they were surrounded on all sides by dense vegetation. They went quickly and quietly, speaking only in whispers, but it was to no avail, for suddenly the ground fell away beneath them and they were hoisted high into the trees within a great net.
"What'th going on?" cried the Jack Lion in fear.
"I was about to ask you the same thing," said a voice. "I am Pride, and you are trespassing in my Forest of Badassness."
"I am Ellie," said Ellie. "This is my trusty companion Dal, and these are Scareryan, Tin Lex and the Jack Lion. We are on our way to see the Great and Terrible OZ. Dal and I wish to go home to Kansas/Auckland/whatevs."
"I need a brain so I can see through the lies and treachery of the women in my life," said Scareryan.
"I need a heart so I can stop using lies and treachery on the women in my life," said Tin Lex.
"I need courage tho I can win the heart of the beautiful Ellie - oh, I mean, thtand up for mythelf," said the Jack Lion.
"Would you like to come with us, Mister Pride?" asked Ellie politely. "Perhaps you have some great character defect that the Great and Terrible OZ can help you overcome."
"No, I am too awesome to need such a thing," said Pride. "If the Great and Powerful OZ had a charm that could ward off annoying manwhores who come along and fuck your shit up, that would be great, but such a thing does not exist. However, I will use my amazing woodland skills to lead you out of this forest and down to the river, where you can sail downstream to find the Yellow Brick Road."
Pride was as good and awesome as his word, and soon they were out of the woods and stood by a fast-flowing river.
"If you follow this river for the next twenty miles, you will come to place where it forks in two different directions. Take the left fork, and that will bring you to a field of poppies. Beyond that lies the Yellow Brick Road. I wish you luck on your journey!"
They were all very sad to say goodbye to Pride, because he was so great and also handsome, but alas, he had his own life to lead and so could not be part of this story. Dal and the Jack Lion built a raft made from pure science, and they sailed away down the river.
Quite soon they came to the poppy field, where they disembarked. But little did they know that the poppy field was actually infected with Technos! The Technos hooked them all up to the Paradise technology in an effort to turn them into slaves. Only Scareryan, having no brain, was immune, and somehow he managed to escape.
Poor Scareryan wandered, lost and alone. He had no brain, and no clue as to what he should do next. Then he saw some ponies being rounded up by the Technos.
"Oh please help us!" cried the ponies. Scareryan was a kindly soul, and he knew he had to save the ponies.
"Oh, what would Tin Lex do?" he thought, but Tin Lex would probably eat the ponies and then go drinkiing and whoring, and that did not seem very useful. "What would Ellie do?" he asked himself, but writing a daring expose on the mistreatment of ponies did not seem like the right course either. "What would the Jack Lion do?" he thought, and there he had it. So he roared a terrible roar, and all the Technos ran away, and the ponies were saved.
"Thank you, Scareryan!" said the head pony. "My name is Pony Joe, and I am forever in your debt. Please tell me, how I can repay your kindness?"
"My friends are in the poppy fields, blissed out on Paradise technology," said Scareryan. "Please help me to save them!"
So the ponies, lead by Pony Joe, stormed the poppy fields and trampled every last bit of the Paradise technology. Then they helped carry the disorientated travellers out of the poppy field and, at long last, to the Yellow Brick Road.
"Be sure to call on us again if you should ever need us!" said Pony Joe, then he and all his ponies left.
Now they were on the Yellow Brick Road, and in the far distance, they could see the bright shining jewel that was the Emerald City.
"Soon I shall be home!" thought Ellie.
"Soon I shall have a brain!" thought Scareryan.
"Soon I shall steal some valuable Emerald paving slabs- uh, I mean, have a heart," thought Tin Lex.
"Thoon Ellie thall be home," thought the Jack Lion, and though he shed some silent Lion Tears at the thought, he hoped that with the courage he would gain from the Great and Terrible OZ, he would not mind her leaving as much.
They came to the great gates of the Emerald City, where they found their way was blocked by two guards, whose names were Tally and Andy.
"We have come to see the Great and Terrible OZ," said Ellie. "Please, could you take us to him?"
"That depends," said Tally.
"On what you're going to give us," said Andy.
"How about I break both your arms if you don't let us through?" said Tin Lex.
Tally and Andy conferred briefly, decided this was a good deal, and led the way.
"But first you must all put on these green spectacles," said Tally.
"That is the law in the Emerald City," Andy explained.
"Otherwise it's beauty and brilliance would burn off your face," added Tally.
Nobody wanted to get their faces burnt off, so they all agreed to wear the spectacles. Even with them, the Emerald City was almost too beautiful to behold. All the surfaces sparkled and shone in the sunlight, and all the people had green hair and wore green clothes.
They were lead to the Palace and made to wait in a small ante-chamber while Tally and Andy disappeared, presumably to relay their request for an audience to the Great and Terrible OZ. When they returned, they explained that OZ would see each of them in turn, alone.
To be continued... whenever.
Once upon a time in far-away Kansas/Auckland/whatevs, there lived a brave and beautiful girl whose name was Ellie. Ellie lived on a small farm which she ran with her sister, Alice, and her trusted sidekick, Dal.
One day a tornado came and whisked Ellie and Dal and the farmhouse in which they lived up into the sky. When they landed, it was in a strange and magical place.
"Dal," said Ellie. "I don't think we are in in Kansas/Auckland/whatevs anymore."
"I think you are right, Ellie," said Dal, looking up at her with adoring eyes.
Suddenly, they were surrounded by people in blue robes. "All hail Ellie, the Great Deliverer!" they cried. One of the people in blue robes introduced himself as Loq, and explained that they were the Chosen of Zoot, but their mission to bring power and chaos had been corrupted by the Wicked Guardian of the East, on whom Ellie's farmhouse had landed. All that was left of him were his shiny white cowboy boots, sticking out from under the house.
"Now we are free to bring power and chaos to the world without getting distracted by silly things like burning people at the stake," said Loq. "We owe you a great debt. How can we ever repay you?"
Ellie was going to ask for gold and jewels, but she was a practical girl and realised carrying them on her journey home would be a great effort. So instead she asked for a basket of food and water, which the Chosen were happy to give her.
The Chosen departed to pray and burn down buildings and other Zootlike things. Ellie and Dal prepared to leave also, when there was a burst of bright light, an explosion of sparkles, and Ebony, the Good Witch of the North, appeared.
"I am Ebony, the Good Witch of the North!" she declared grandly.
"Are you sure you're the Good Witch?" asked Ellie. "I didn't think Good Witches wore so much leather."
"Dress codes are for pansies," scoffed Ebony. "Today I am fighting on the Side of Good. Tomorrow it may change, who knows? Anyway, I bet you would like to get back home to Kansas/Auckland/whatevs, am I right?" said Ebony.
"Oh yes," said Ellie. "Very much so!"
"Well, too bad!" said Ebony, the Good Witch of the North, and laughed in a decidedly non-Good-Witch-like way. Ellie felt very sad and started to cry.
"Oh stop that!" said Ebony. "I only meant I cannot send you home with my Good Witch powers. But if you follow the Yellow Brick Road to the Phoenix City Mall, there you will find the Great and Terrible OZ, who may be able to help."
"Oh, thank you!" said Ellie. "I am ever so grateful to you, Good Witch of the North!"
"One more thing," said Ebony. "You had better take the Guardian's shiny white shoes with you. My Good Witch powers tell me they might come in useful."
"I don't think taking shoes from a dead man is a very nice thing to do," said Ellie, doubtfully. "Also, they will not suit me at all."
"I'm sure you will look very beautiful," said Dal, earnestly.
"Look, kid, do you want to go home or not?" said Ebony, who was tired of floating around making sparkles and wanted to go home. "Do as I say and take the damn ugly shoes!"
So Ellie did as she was told and took the damn ugly shoes. They did not go with her outfit at all, but she hoped people would be distracted by her big blue eyes and long blonde hair and not notice too much. Off she went with Dal in search of the Yellow Brick Road.
They had not gone very far when they came across a cornfield that was covered with crows. In the centre of the cornfield stood a very dejected-looking Scarecrow.
"Hey Scarecrow, why so serious?" asked Ellie.
"What?" said the Scarecrow blankly.
"Wrong movie," whispered Dal.
"Oh," said Ellie. "Sorry."
"I am the Scareryan," said Scareryan. "I am sad because my wife is in love with someone else, and only married me because she was pregnant."
"How awful!" said Ellie.
"It is," said Scareryan. "Oh, if only I had a brain, I would have seen it sooner!"
"We are going to the Emerald City to seek out the Great and Terrible OZ," said Ellie. "He may have the power to send me back to Kansas/Auckland/whatevs. Perhaps he could also give you a brain."
"Perhaps..." said Scareryan.
"Come with us!" said Ellie, linking her arm with Scareryans. "We can be friends!"
And off they went in search of the Yellow Brick Road.
They had gone only a little way when they heard shouting in the distance, followed by the sound of running footsteps. Suddenly, a Tin Man burst through the bushes directly into their path.
"Run!" he said, "She has gone quite mad!"
"Who has gone mad?" asked Dal.
"My wife," said the Tin Man. "I told her I only married her for sex, and she went crazy and started throwing things at me. I have to wear this armour to protect my beautiful face from damage! By the way, those shoes are really ugly."
"I am not suprised she threw things at you," said Ellie sternly. "What a horrible thing to say! You must be quite heartless."
"We are going to the Emerald City to seek out the Great and Terrible OZ," said Scareryan. "Ellie and Dal want to go back to Kansas/Auckland/whatevs, and I am going to ask for a brain. Perhaps if you come with us, he can give you a heart."
"Yes," said the Tin Man. "Oh, if only I had a heart, maybe I would stop pulling stunts like this."
"Is that likely?" asked Dal.
"Probably not," said the Tin Man. "But I can't go home until she's calmed down anyway, so I might as well go with you. My name is Tin Lex, by the way,"
Ellie tried to link arms with Tin Lex, but after he groped her a couple of times, she changed her mind and decided to keep her distance.
Off they went once more in search of the Yellow Brick Road
They had been walking for some time when suddenly, a scary Lion leapt from the bushes in front of them.
"Roar!" said the scary Lion, "I am the Jack Lion, thith ith my territory and you may not path unleth you give me back my copper wire!"
There was a long silence.
"Pardon?" said Ellie eventually.
"You may not path!"
"What?" said Dal.
"Give me my copper wireth!"
The travellers exchanged glances.
"I don't understand what he's saying," said Scareryan. "Perhaps it is because I do not have a brain."
"I don't understand what he's saying because he lisps," said Tin Lex. "I can make fun of people with speech impediments because I don't have a heart."
"Copper wireth!" said the scary Jack Lion. "I know you thtole it, Tin Leckth, and I want it back!" Then he added "Roar!" as an afterthought.
"Oh," said Tin Lex. "Well, I gave it to my wife, who isn't speaking to me right now because she found out I only married her so she'd sleep with me, so you can't have it."
"You thuck," said the Jack Lion. "Theriouthly, you completely thuck. Now I am going to eat you all ath a delithiouth thnack!"
"Oh no!" cried Ellie, flinging up her arms in horror.
The Jack Lion prepared to charge, but suddenly Dal ran up to him and slapped him across the face.
"Knock it off, Jack Lion," said Dal crossly. "We have to get to the Emerald City and you are slowing us down with your tantrums."
"Ow!" said the Jack Lion indignantly. "What wath that for?"
"You said you'd eat us," said Ellie. "That's not very friendly."
"I wathn't really going to eat you," said the Jack Lion. "I only thaid that tho you'd leave before Tin Leckth thtealth any more of my thtuff. I am a thcientitht, but I can't invent thingth if people keep taking my toolth."
"Poor Jack Lion," said Ellie, and her heart melted. "It must be so terrible for you,"
"Yeth," said the Jack Lion sadly. "If only I wath braver and could thtand up for mythelf."
Tin Lex snorted. Ellie glared at him.
"Shut up, Tin Leckth- I mean, Lex. You really are heartless! Jack Lion, we are going to the Emerald City so that Dal and I can go home to Kansas/Auckland/whatevs, and Scareryan can get a brain and Tin Lex can get a heart. Maybe if you come with us, he can give you some courage."
"Or some speech therapy," muttered Tin Lex, but the Jack Lion was so entranced by Ellie's beauty that he didn't hear, and it was a good thing too.
On they went, and soon they came to a deep, dark forest.
"I hear there are dreadful beathts in thethe woodth," said the Jack Lion nervously, and he began to tremble at the very thought. "All kindth of nightmareith creatureth!"
"Like what?" asked Ellie, clinging to the Jack Lion's magnificently spiky orange mane.
"Like Locos, and Demon Dogs, and Tribe Circus," said Tin Lex.
"Oh my!" said Scareryan.
But the only way to the Yellow Brick Road was through those woods, and so in they went. Soon they were surrounded on all sides by dense vegetation. They went quickly and quietly, speaking only in whispers, but it was to no avail, for suddenly the ground fell away beneath them and they were hoisted high into the trees within a great net.
"What'th going on?" cried the Jack Lion in fear.
"I was about to ask you the same thing," said a voice. "I am Pride, and you are trespassing in my Forest of Badassness."
"I am Ellie," said Ellie. "This is my trusty companion Dal, and these are Scareryan, Tin Lex and the Jack Lion. We are on our way to see the Great and Terrible OZ. Dal and I wish to go home to Kansas/Auckland/whatevs."
"I need a brain so I can see through the lies and treachery of the women in my life," said Scareryan.
"I need a heart so I can stop using lies and treachery on the women in my life," said Tin Lex.
"I need courage tho I can win the heart of the beautiful Ellie - oh, I mean, thtand up for mythelf," said the Jack Lion.
"Would you like to come with us, Mister Pride?" asked Ellie politely. "Perhaps you have some great character defect that the Great and Terrible OZ can help you overcome."
"No, I am too awesome to need such a thing," said Pride. "If the Great and Powerful OZ had a charm that could ward off annoying manwhores who come along and fuck your shit up, that would be great, but such a thing does not exist. However, I will use my amazing woodland skills to lead you out of this forest and down to the river, where you can sail downstream to find the Yellow Brick Road."
Pride was as good and awesome as his word, and soon they were out of the woods and stood by a fast-flowing river.
"If you follow this river for the next twenty miles, you will come to place where it forks in two different directions. Take the left fork, and that will bring you to a field of poppies. Beyond that lies the Yellow Brick Road. I wish you luck on your journey!"
They were all very sad to say goodbye to Pride, because he was so great and also handsome, but alas, he had his own life to lead and so could not be part of this story. Dal and the Jack Lion built a raft made from pure science, and they sailed away down the river.
Quite soon they came to the poppy field, where they disembarked. But little did they know that the poppy field was actually infected with Technos! The Technos hooked them all up to the Paradise technology in an effort to turn them into slaves. Only Scareryan, having no brain, was immune, and somehow he managed to escape.
Poor Scareryan wandered, lost and alone. He had no brain, and no clue as to what he should do next. Then he saw some ponies being rounded up by the Technos.
"Oh please help us!" cried the ponies. Scareryan was a kindly soul, and he knew he had to save the ponies.
"Oh, what would Tin Lex do?" he thought, but Tin Lex would probably eat the ponies and then go drinkiing and whoring, and that did not seem very useful. "What would Ellie do?" he asked himself, but writing a daring expose on the mistreatment of ponies did not seem like the right course either. "What would the Jack Lion do?" he thought, and there he had it. So he roared a terrible roar, and all the Technos ran away, and the ponies were saved.
"Thank you, Scareryan!" said the head pony. "My name is Pony Joe, and I am forever in your debt. Please tell me, how I can repay your kindness?"
"My friends are in the poppy fields, blissed out on Paradise technology," said Scareryan. "Please help me to save them!"
So the ponies, lead by Pony Joe, stormed the poppy fields and trampled every last bit of the Paradise technology. Then they helped carry the disorientated travellers out of the poppy field and, at long last, to the Yellow Brick Road.
"Be sure to call on us again if you should ever need us!" said Pony Joe, then he and all his ponies left.
Now they were on the Yellow Brick Road, and in the far distance, they could see the bright shining jewel that was the Emerald City.
"Soon I shall be home!" thought Ellie.
"Soon I shall have a brain!" thought Scareryan.
"Soon I shall steal some valuable Emerald paving slabs- uh, I mean, have a heart," thought Tin Lex.
"Thoon Ellie thall be home," thought the Jack Lion, and though he shed some silent Lion Tears at the thought, he hoped that with the courage he would gain from the Great and Terrible OZ, he would not mind her leaving as much.
They came to the great gates of the Emerald City, where they found their way was blocked by two guards, whose names were Tally and Andy.
"We have come to see the Great and Terrible OZ," said Ellie. "Please, could you take us to him?"
"That depends," said Tally.
"On what you're going to give us," said Andy.
"How about I break both your arms if you don't let us through?" said Tin Lex.
Tally and Andy conferred briefly, decided this was a good deal, and led the way.
"But first you must all put on these green spectacles," said Tally.
"That is the law in the Emerald City," Andy explained.
"Otherwise it's beauty and brilliance would burn off your face," added Tally.
Nobody wanted to get their faces burnt off, so they all agreed to wear the spectacles. Even with them, the Emerald City was almost too beautiful to behold. All the surfaces sparkled and shone in the sunlight, and all the people had green hair and wore green clothes.
They were lead to the Palace and made to wait in a small ante-chamber while Tally and Andy disappeared, presumably to relay their request for an audience to the Great and Terrible OZ. When they returned, they explained that OZ would see each of them in turn, alone.
To be continued... whenever.