When Money Talks, I Hate To Listen, But Lately It's Been Screaming In My Ears...
So it's pretty much inevitable. There's no way that I'm going to get to go to any college that I really want to. A lot of my friends say that, but my family seriously has very little money, just nobody knows it.
"But you drive a nice car!"
Yeah, that my parents didn't pay for.
"You have a house with a pool!"
Yeah, that's worth half of what your Killearn houses cost. Honestly.
"You wear nice clothes!"
Yeah, that I paid for out of the $100 I get a month from a grandparent or was on a really good sale.
If you'll notice, it's rare that I do anything that costs more than $10, maybe even $5. $100 a month doesn't go very far.
I know I do have a lot because my grandparents help out. I'm trying not to be ungrateful for what I have. Both of my parens went to college and work really hard. Shows how far that gets you.
I want to go away to college so badly. So incredibly badly. Collegeboard estimates that my family will be expected to pay $5-6000 a year for my education. They don't even have that much money right now and then... where is the other 40,000 going to come from? FAFSA and Pell won't even put a dent in that. Way to work hard in high school, have fun at FSU with everyone else you went to school with!
It's basically impossible to get a job in this town except at Publix. I've applied to about 10 places. I have an interview at 1, but probably won't get the job. Publix here I come!
Fucking money making things hard.
Every day I regret abandoning arts. I used to dance so much. I started pointe when I was like 9. I was doing solo by the time I ended elemantary school and I left it because of one stupid teacher. That decision was the biggest mistake I ever made. I see professional ballerinas and dancers now and I think "that could be me, I could do that if I'd stayed." Funny how the issue that made me leave still troubles me now. Coincidence? I think not. Lesson learned: don't let superficial take away your dreams, always do what you love. I look at my first pointe shoe and how tiny it is and think about how full of potential I was and it hurts so much. Like 15 hours a week of dance to zero because of one conversation.
Birth control is really annoying. I'll probably be a virgin for a long time. There is no way to know for sure that you aren't making a baby. I don't even want children ever so I wish my ovaries would just go away because, honestly, I might like to have sex with my boyfriend but I can't because of the possibility of babies that I don't ever want. Grr.
Vanity takes over sometimes. Don't we all want to be beautiful, but for whom and at what expense?
I've always known I'd be a bank robber, so judge all you want ladies and gentlemen because you never did become an astronaut. [asofterworld.com]
"But you drive a nice car!"
Yeah, that my parents didn't pay for.
"You have a house with a pool!"
Yeah, that's worth half of what your Killearn houses cost. Honestly.
"You wear nice clothes!"
Yeah, that I paid for out of the $100 I get a month from a grandparent or was on a really good sale.
If you'll notice, it's rare that I do anything that costs more than $10, maybe even $5. $100 a month doesn't go very far.
I know I do have a lot because my grandparents help out. I'm trying not to be ungrateful for what I have. Both of my parens went to college and work really hard. Shows how far that gets you.
I want to go away to college so badly. So incredibly badly. Collegeboard estimates that my family will be expected to pay $5-6000 a year for my education. They don't even have that much money right now and then... where is the other 40,000 going to come from? FAFSA and Pell won't even put a dent in that. Way to work hard in high school, have fun at FSU with everyone else you went to school with!
It's basically impossible to get a job in this town except at Publix. I've applied to about 10 places. I have an interview at 1, but probably won't get the job. Publix here I come!
Fucking money making things hard.
Every day I regret abandoning arts. I used to dance so much. I started pointe when I was like 9. I was doing solo by the time I ended elemantary school and I left it because of one stupid teacher. That decision was the biggest mistake I ever made. I see professional ballerinas and dancers now and I think "that could be me, I could do that if I'd stayed." Funny how the issue that made me leave still troubles me now. Coincidence? I think not. Lesson learned: don't let superficial take away your dreams, always do what you love. I look at my first pointe shoe and how tiny it is and think about how full of potential I was and it hurts so much. Like 15 hours a week of dance to zero because of one conversation.
Birth control is really annoying. I'll probably be a virgin for a long time. There is no way to know for sure that you aren't making a baby. I don't even want children ever so I wish my ovaries would just go away because, honestly, I might like to have sex with my boyfriend but I can't because of the possibility of babies that I don't ever want. Grr.
Vanity takes over sometimes. Don't we all want to be beautiful, but for whom and at what expense?
I've always known I'd be a bank robber, so judge all you want ladies and gentlemen because you never did become an astronaut. [asofterworld.com]