our day of silence yesterday was broken while watching fear factor.. yes, ladies and gentlemen, it is officially the apocalypse, people are bonding during shitty "reality" game shows
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being married and having the tendency to walk into the bedroom and tell my (usually) darling husband "go away" while we're fighting, I might have some insight...
...it's because you cocky bastards think you can angrily reason your way into making us turn around and go "ooh, wow, I never thought about it that way before! Gosh darn it husband, you're so smart, come here and let me sex you!", when in fact, all you ever do is make it worse! We have valid points, we're just trying not to let our emotions make us fall apart, and you're chasing us around the dwelling, stubbornly insisting upon your position, and we're about to explode, and all we really want is a moment of solace. If we could just have a moment to think *clearly* we might be able to come up with some intelligent compromise or some sort of overture that would smooth over the present situation, but no, we get the barrage of testosterone going "look at how intelligent and RIGHT I am!!!" ... see, you think you want us to break down, but it's embarrasing, because it looks like we can't rely on our own strength and intelligent arguments. We know we CAN have them, it's just that our emotions happen to get so caught up in the present fight that we need a minute to think before we can talk it through to compromise....
I could be totally wrong about what happens with you and your wife, but I know this is what happens with me and my husband. I explained this to him once, and he actually once remembered (joy) and when I told him to "go away" he nodded curtly, went into the other room, made hot chocolate, gave me a cup and said "we're both mad, but if we get a bit calmer, maybe we can remember that we really want to work this out"...it worked. Feel free to steal that tactic. It won him really really really good make-up sex later.
I'm not so sure it's exactly the same. I certainly don't want her to break down, and I don't want to tell her how "right" I am all the time, either. I just want to find a resolution to the current problem and move on. It's the only way I can. I usually do leave her alone for a little while these days, but then most of the time she yells at me for not chasing her, so I think that's why I do it so much. But thanks for the advice. Maybe I can try a slightly different approach next time so she doesn't think that's what I'm doing.
...it's because you cocky bastards think you can angrily reason your way into making us turn around and go "ooh, wow, I never thought about it that way before! Gosh darn it husband, you're so smart, come here and let me sex you!", when in fact, all you ever do is make it worse! We have valid points, we're just trying not to let our emotions make us fall apart, and you're chasing us around the dwelling, stubbornly insisting upon your position, and we're about to explode, and all we really want is a moment of solace. If we could just have a moment to think *clearly* we might be able to come up with some intelligent compromise or some sort of overture that would smooth over the present situation, but no, we get the barrage of testosterone going "look at how intelligent and RIGHT I am!!!" ...
see, you think you want us to break down, but it's embarrasing, because it looks like we can't rely on our own strength and intelligent arguments. We know we CAN have them, it's just that our emotions happen to get so caught up in the present fight that we need a minute to think before we can talk it through to compromise....
I could be totally wrong about what happens with you and your wife, but I know this is what happens with me and my husband. I explained this to him once, and he actually once remembered (joy) and when I told him to "go away" he nodded curtly, went into the other room, made hot chocolate, gave me a cup and said "we're both mad, but if we get a bit calmer, maybe we can remember that we really want to work this out"...it worked. Feel free to steal that tactic. It won him really really really good make-up sex later.
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