How to Find a Good Therapist
Awhile ago, I promised an LJ friend I'd post an entry on how to find a good therapist. I've had some experience with some great and not-so-great therapists, and it wasn't by chance that I came upon the good ones.
The entry is a bit long, but I felt it important to be rather detailed because there are a number of steps to consider when making, what I think is, a really important decision. Your therapist will ultimately require your utmost trust if you want to make true gains in therapy, and that trust can only be built if there's a good fit. Once the trust is established, your therapist will have the power to influence the way you view the world around you. It's a decision that deserves a lot of thought and care.
I saw a not-so-great therapist for four long years, and didn't stop seeing her because I didn't know she wasn't a good therapist. Looking back on it now, however, I recognize that my gut *always* knew, I just didn't recognize the message for what it was. I was never at ease with the therapist, I was always in a heightened state of anxiousness when in her office, and the entire time I thought that was my fault, but I see now, that when you're seeing someone whom you click with-- you're at ease unless you're discussing something particularly painful/anxiety inducing.
What made this particular therapist not-so-good? She was a psychiatrist by training (an M.D.), and as such, did not receive the intense training required to administer transformative talk therapy (which psychologists, who have Ph.D's do). She promised me she was using cognitive-behavioral techniques to help me, but I later learned that what she was doing was nothing of the sort.
I share that not as a horror story, or to scare you away from all psychiatrists, but to share why I think it's so important that a search is conducted.
If you have any questions at all, please don't hesitate to ask.
Finding a therapist through your insurance provider (a pro/neutral/con list)
PRO
- Partial or all of the therapy is covered. Depending on where you're located, therapy can be really expensive. In Atlanta I paid $120/session, in DC I pay $140/session, but in DC this is actually average--it goes up as high as $300-400 a session which is TOTALLY unnecessary.
- You're given a list of therapist to choose from (makes searching for therapists easier)
- Even if a therapist isn't covered by your insurance, you can usually file a claim and get partial coverage for a few sessions a year.
NEUTRAL
- If you go through your insurance company, I'm not sure how much information you're given about each therapist so you can make an educated choice. I know my insurance offers some information (how long they've been practicing, what school they went to), but when it comes down to the really important stuff-- you won't be able to find that out until you contact them and ask (more on this later).
CON
- A previous therapist encouraged me to keep my mental health care "off my insurance records" as it can affect future coverage benefits.
- An unfortunate, but true fact is that most good therapists aren't covered by insurance. Once a therapist has proven their success rate in the field, they can afford to be independent so they no longer have to deal with the headache of insurance (it's convoluted and complicated for psychologists to deal with).
- Ultimately, you have to weigh the costs and benefits. In my eyes, I had seen already a therapist through my insurance company for 4 years, and that individual didn't help me at all. that said, they were actually a psychiatrist (medical doctor), and they are usually not trained in administering counseling, so it may simply have been because of that. I would try going through your insurance, and then really seeing if you're experience some change in your life 3-4 months later (it shouldn't take much longer than that).
- As mentioned before, there is a limit to the number of sessions you can have either per month, or per year.
- My current therapist is an Acceptance and Commitment Therapist (ACT), and speaking solely from personal recommendation, I encourage you to look for one who specializes in this. This isn't to discount the effectiveness of any other school of therapeutic thought, this was just what I found resonated very well with me.
- Unfortunately, there isn’t a good direct search link to find therapists who specialize in this form of therapy, however, I did find this website: Find an ACT Therapist, which gives some direction.
- Another option? Let me know and I can ask my therapist for a personal recommendation if she knows somebody in your area. She really is fantastic, so I would totally trust her to suggest someone equally awesome.
- When I was in Atlanta, I contacted the psychology department of the local university-- Emory University. There I spoke to the head who told me that while she couldn't see me, she could refer me to a colleague who was excellent...this person ended up being my therapist (Dr. J).
- When I moved to DC, I did as Dr. J instructed and went to: http://therapists.psychologytoday.com/rms/, which is a well-known search site on Psychology Today.
- After clicking on your state and city, a list of therapists in that area will appear. Before going into your search, however, I suggest you refine this further using their advanced search tools
- At the top of the page there is a box which lists zip codes, and directly under that box is a thinner box that reads:
Local: Insurance Info | Group therapy | more… - Click on more...
- This is a great way to filter your choices to fit any preferences you have (e.g. therapist’s gender, type). The one that I think is most important is the “Therapist Orientation”. There are two types I strongly suggest you search under:
- Those trained in Mindfulness-based Cognitive Therapy (This is the closest to searching for an ACT therapist, which is what my therapist is person I’m seeing right now works with this orientation and I can’t tell you how EXCELLENT it is),
- and Cognitive Behavioral Therapist (CBT). Both are scientifically proven to be therapeutically effective.
- I actually printed out all my results, and with highlighter in hand, I read all their profiles, marked things that stood out, and reflected on how I felt about them. A lot of this is going on your gut-maybe someone appeals to you because they’re younger, maybe someone else appeals because they’re older and more motherly. It’s all a matter of personal preference, and remember, even if it doesn’t work out with the one you choose, you can always go to another.
- In my case, I found that the younger the therapist was (a.k.a. closer to my age), the better I was able to relate to them. Interestingly, I also found that when seeing my male therapist, I was better able to face the anxieties I had developed around men through him.
With my current therapist (who’s around my age and female), I’m my most relaxed and laid back. I needed to go through the male therapist first for one type of personal growth, and am at a good place to proceed in another direction with my female one.
- In case you're curious, I was drawn to my current therapist's Psychology Today profile because:
- I loved what she wrote about herself and her practice (she’s so real an down-to-earth)I did her 30-minute phone consultation she offers (at her urging) to see if there was an initial
- It was very important for me to find someone with a specialty in anxiety, and I particularly wanted someone with a strength in it (listed in green on the profile).
- I liked that she was young, but that she also had 10 years of experience under her belt
- I appreciated the time and effort she put into her personal website. (this is completely arbitrary, however, it was just an extraneous touch I liked).
- Once you find a few therapists you like, contact them by email. Here is a direct copy/paste draft of what I sent to Josh, my therapist in Atlanta:
Dear Dr. J,
My name is S and I was writing to inquire a bit about your counseling services, particularly with regards to cognitive behavioral therapy for anxiety. I have suffered from this for many years and am eager to work one on one with a therapist who is CBT trained.
Do you take any type of insurance, and if so, do you accept Aetna? If you do not, how much do you charge per session?
Thank you very much.
Sincerely,
S
- Once he wrote back, I had an armament of questions to ask him:
1. I was wondering if you could tell me a bit about your professional training and degree?
2. How much specialized training and experience have you had treating individuals with CBT and anxiety issues?
- Of the four therapists I contacted, J was the only one who replied in a way that made me comfortable (he actually wrote a novel..which I loved!) I finally spoke to him on the phone to confirm an appointment, and hearing his voice made me feel even more comfortable.
- I gave myself some time to see how things went with him, and knew that if 3-4 months had passed and I was seeing no sizable changes, it was probably time for me to move on and find a new therapist. It's a shame if it comes to this since it's hard to keep opening up to therapists, but on the whole, it's worth it to do that than to waste your time. Putting that into consideration, however, you might understand why I went to such lengths initially to ensure I was going to see someone good.