myspace is down and I feel like typing
So it's been forever since I updated this thing. I really don't plan on ressurecting my lj but I'm bored, hyper and finished with all my work.
I've been reminiscing quite a bit lately for various and random reasons.
I felt like a very proud parent watching my boys win their first VMA. Scenesters be damned, Avenged Sevenfold is still the best metal band around and treat their fans better then most strippers ever could. I remember the first time I heard "Darkness Surronding" on the Warmness EP back in the 9th grade, a love like this hasn't been known since Romeo's Juliet.
While longboarding through Provo, east side style I was totally missing the days when my brother Alex and I would go bike riding. As a wise girl once said "bike riding during the summer is the best"
More then ever I'm missing my demolished car. She was a good car, a black car, and most importantly she was MY car. I feel bad for wreckig her but my remorse is drowned by the rage growing on account of my fucking insurance company dragging their feet on processing my claim and getting me mobile again. On the plus side, the "batz mobile" as those who were close referred to her as will be reincarnated soon in the form of a 1987 635cl or something along that family tree. Have I ever mentioned how much I despise insurance companys?
excess adderall + me = far too much energy
According to my scale I have lost 5 lbs in the last 13 days, sadly though I think it's all wine weight and I'll pack it all on again. In other appearance news my hair hasn't been as long as it is since post florida splendor, pre-college buzz.
Speaking of school I was accepted to the U but I'm now debating actually going there. Apparently the Y has better facilites and all that shit and their international studies dept. totally owns. God knows my parents would be far more eager to help pay for the Y and I do love Provo but not nearly as much as I love Salt Lake. Decisions, decisions.
Matt Skiba is still god
Bad Religion is fun aerobic tune-ige
I really really really really want to get another tattoo.
Addicts are by far some of the most honest people you'll ever find. Sleep refused to come to me so I re-read "Choke" for 16th time (not an exaggeration) and I love Palahniuk even more. I've even forgiven him for the nightmares he gave me with "haunted." I just love how when Mr. Mancini is fucking one of his numerous fuck buddies in the women's bathroom he calls her "beautiful" a comment that made her snort and ask why he would say such a thing. And I love how Mancini explains to himself "because in 5 minutes the only thing we'll hate more then each other is ourselves." How fucking true is that shit. God did something right when he wrote Chuck. That man has definitly helped me not feel like a total freak/loser/whack job on many occasions and to a great extent I think his inspiring wors are the reason I'm still fighting the good fight in hopes of a better day. But back to addictions I'm all for drugs and sex and all that fun stuff but when it comes down to it the lifestlye becomes borderline pathetic.
How desensitized have I become to where I only feel anything while doing something extreme? Subtly is dead and so is satisfaction. I just think it's sad that feeling numb or drunk is my way of feeling anything anymore. Then again I could just be feeling a bit masochistic at the moment and trying to make myself feel good by talking shit about the things I DO to feel "good." I still plan on using and abusing and enjoying all the chemicals that are at my disposal and loving the effects they have on me but I think it's sad that I can only "feel" when I'm under the influence. That said, a lovely red burgandy has my name written all over it for this friday. Can you say drinking alone while enjoying Alkaline while working on my italano homework? Because I sure can.
Shivaree owns my ears and The Pussycat Dolls own my ass.
I've been reminiscing quite a bit lately for various and random reasons.
I felt like a very proud parent watching my boys win their first VMA. Scenesters be damned, Avenged Sevenfold is still the best metal band around and treat their fans better then most strippers ever could. I remember the first time I heard "Darkness Surronding" on the Warmness EP back in the 9th grade, a love like this hasn't been known since Romeo's Juliet.
While longboarding through Provo, east side style I was totally missing the days when my brother Alex and I would go bike riding. As a wise girl once said "bike riding during the summer is the best"
More then ever I'm missing my demolished car. She was a good car, a black car, and most importantly she was MY car. I feel bad for wreckig her but my remorse is drowned by the rage growing on account of my fucking insurance company dragging their feet on processing my claim and getting me mobile again. On the plus side, the "batz mobile" as those who were close referred to her as will be reincarnated soon in the form of a 1987 635cl or something along that family tree. Have I ever mentioned how much I despise insurance companys?
excess adderall + me = far too much energy
According to my scale I have lost 5 lbs in the last 13 days, sadly though I think it's all wine weight and I'll pack it all on again. In other appearance news my hair hasn't been as long as it is since post florida splendor, pre-college buzz.
Speaking of school I was accepted to the U but I'm now debating actually going there. Apparently the Y has better facilites and all that shit and their international studies dept. totally owns. God knows my parents would be far more eager to help pay for the Y and I do love Provo but not nearly as much as I love Salt Lake. Decisions, decisions.
Matt Skiba is still god
Bad Religion is fun aerobic tune-ige
I really really really really want to get another tattoo.
Addicts are by far some of the most honest people you'll ever find. Sleep refused to come to me so I re-read "Choke" for 16th time (not an exaggeration) and I love Palahniuk even more. I've even forgiven him for the nightmares he gave me with "haunted." I just love how when Mr. Mancini is fucking one of his numerous fuck buddies in the women's bathroom he calls her "beautiful" a comment that made her snort and ask why he would say such a thing. And I love how Mancini explains to himself "because in 5 minutes the only thing we'll hate more then each other is ourselves." How fucking true is that shit. God did something right when he wrote Chuck. That man has definitly helped me not feel like a total freak/loser/whack job on many occasions and to a great extent I think his inspiring wors are the reason I'm still fighting the good fight in hopes of a better day. But back to addictions I'm all for drugs and sex and all that fun stuff but when it comes down to it the lifestlye becomes borderline pathetic.
How desensitized have I become to where I only feel anything while doing something extreme? Subtly is dead and so is satisfaction. I just think it's sad that feeling numb or drunk is my way of feeling anything anymore. Then again I could just be feeling a bit masochistic at the moment and trying to make myself feel good by talking shit about the things I DO to feel "good." I still plan on using and abusing and enjoying all the chemicals that are at my disposal and loving the effects they have on me but I think it's sad that I can only "feel" when I'm under the influence. That said, a lovely red burgandy has my name written all over it for this friday. Can you say drinking alone while enjoying Alkaline while working on my italano homework? Because I sure can.
Shivaree owns my ears and The Pussycat Dolls own my ass.