Fritzy's Cookbook
So recently a friend asked me to send her one of my favorite recipes, and I couldn't pick just one, so here is assembled 11 of the things I particularly like to make, for your enjoyment. Almost all these recipes are not originally mine, they're pulled from various places, but I have made modifications to most of them.
Potato Crispies
Ingredients:
4 Russet Potatoes
Vegetable Oil
Dried Dill
Garlic Salt
Garlic Powder
Black Pepper
Dried Basil
Directions:
Peel and cut potatoes into 1/2" cubes
Coat the bottom of a cooking pan in vegetable oil and heat.
Add cubed potatoes, toss to coat in oil, and cook until golden brown and crispy.
As potatoes are just beginning to get crispy, add seasonings to taste.
Consume ravenously.
Tomato Basil Soup
Ingredients:
2 28oz cans Crushed Tomatoes
1 15oz can Chicken Broth
Small handful fresh basil leaves (a dozen or so), minced
1 Tbs Sugar
1 Cup Heavy Cream
1/2 Cup of Unsalted Butter
Directions:
In large pot, bring tomatoes and chicken broth to a boil.
Reduce heat, cover, and simmer for 10-15 minutes.
Add basil, sugar, cream, and butter, reduce heat to low, and cook until butter is melted.
Swill heartily.
Triple Chocolate Fuck You In The Mouth Truffle Cake
Ingredients:
3 Cups Semi-Sweet Chocolate Chips
3/4 Cup Milk Chocolate Chips
1 Cup Unsalted Butter (at room temperature)
8 Large Eggs
1/4 Tsp Salt
1/3 Cup Heavy Cream
1 White Chocolate Baking Bar (for garnish)
Directions:
Preheat oven to 325
Bring a large pot of water to a simmer, and put semi-sweet chips and butter into a 2nd smaller pot, resting that pot over the simmering water.
(Or use a double boiler if you're a fancy pants)
Melt chocolate and butter slowly until smooth and creamy.
Meanwhile, quickly whisk together eggs and salt until light and frothy, about 5 minutes
Gently and slowly fold the egg mixture into the chocolate mixture, a little at a time, mix slowly until smooth
Coat the bottom and sides of a 9" pie pan with butter, then line only the bottom with wax paper.
Pour the mixture into the pie pan, and place the pie pan into a larger pan filled half way up with warm water. Do not allow the water to get into the pie pan.
Bake the whole thing for 40 minutes, then move the whole pie pan to a cooling rack (keep the chocolate in the pie pan).
One pie pan has completely cooled, cover with plastic wrap and refrigerate for at least 8 hours.
To remove the cake from the pie pan, dip the pan in warm water and run a thin knife around the outside edge, carefully invert onto a plate, and remote the pie pan.
Don't forget to remove the wax paper!
Prepare the glaze by bringing the heavy cream to a boil over low heat, then slowly mix in the milk chocolate chips, stir until smooth.
Cool the glaze until it is warm to the touch, then pour it over the top of the cake. Watch for overflow.
Refrigerate the cake for about 30 minutes, then grate white chocolate bar on top of cake for garnish.
Devour as if your life depended on it.
Moroccan Tagine
Ingredients:
Olive Oil
2 Skinless, Boneless Chicken Breasts, cut into chunks
1/2 Onion, Chopped
3-5 Cloves Garlic, minced (to taste)
1 Small Butternut Squash, peeled and chopped into 1/2 cubes
1 15.5 oz can Garbanzo Beans, rinsed and drained.
1 Large Carrot, peeled and chopped
1 14.5 oz can Diced Tomatoes
1 14oz can Vegetable Broth
1 Tbs Sugar
1 Tbs Lemon Juice
1 Tsp Salt
1 Tsp Ground Coriander
1/2 Tsp Cayenne Pepper
Directions:
Heat the olive oil in a big ass pan, cook chicken, onion, and garlic until browned, about 15 minutes.
Add everything else, then bring to a boil for about 30 minutes, until vegetables are tender.
Gobble unabashedly.
Fuck Me Now Garlic Rosemary Pizza
Ingredients:
1 Lb Frozen White Bread Dough, thawed
3 Tbs Olive Oil
4-8 Cloves Garlic, minced (to taste)
1/2 Tsp Dried Rosemary
2 Cups Shredded Mozzerella Cheese
Whatever other delicious pizza toppings you can imagine.
Directions:
Preheat oven to 375
Roll out dough onto lightly floured surface, then transfer to greased baking sheet.
Let stand for about half an hour in a warm place to rise slightly.
In small bowl, combine oil, garlic, and rosemary.
Press a bunch of indentations into the bread using two fingers, then brush oil mixture very liberally over dough.
Bake 18-20 minutes until golden brown, then remove from oven
Coat pizza with cheese and toppings, then bake for another 3-5 minutes until cheese is melted.
Caress it lustfully with your stomach.
Maple Dill Carrots
Ingredients:
3 Cups Peeled, Sliced Carrots
2 Tbs Butter
3 Tbs Brown Sugar
Dried Dill
1/2 Tsp Salt
1/2 Tsp Black Pepper
Directions:
Simmer carrots in water until tender.
Drain water and add butter, brown sugar, salt, and pepper.
Season with Dill to taste.
Stuff thy face.
Bacon Cheeseburger Chicken
Ingredients:
2 Tablespoons Vegetable Oil
2 Boneless, Skinless Chicken Breasts
Teriyaki Sauce
Bacon Ranch Dressing
1 Cup Shredded Cheddar Cheese
2 Green Onions, Chopped
Bacon Bits (the real kind, not those artificial crap nuggets you cheap bastard)
Directions:
Preheat Oven to 350
In large skilled over medium high heat, heat oil and saute chicken about 5 minutes on each side until lightly browned.
Place chicken breasts in a small baking dish lined with tin foil.
Brush liberally with teriyaki sauce, then drizzle liberally with ranch dressing.
Sprinkle with cheese, green onion, and bacon bits.
Bake for 30-35 minutes, until chicken is no longer pink.
Wolf it down to China Town.
Homemade Applesauce
Ingredients:
4 Large Golden Delicious Apples, peeled, cored, and sliced into 8ths
1/2 Cup Apple Cider
1/4 Cup Sugar
1 Tsp Lemon Juice
Directions:
Combine all ingredients in medium pot at heat to boiling over high heat.
Reduce heat to low, then simmer until apples are very tender, about 20-25 minutes.
Remove from stove, and mash to a pulp.
Partake of the Essence.
Cottage Pie
Ingredients:
2 Lbs (about 6) russet potatoes, peeled and cut into quarters.
1/2 Cup Milk
3 Tbs Unsalted Butter
Parmesan Cheese
Salt
Ground Black Pepper
1 Medium Onion, chopped
2 Carrots, peeled and chopped
1 Lb Ground Beef
2 Tbs Tomato Paste
2 Tbs Flour
1/4 Cup Dry Red Wine
1 Cup Chicken Broth
1/4 Tsp Dried Thyme
1 Cup Frozen Peas
Directions:
Preheat oven to 425.
In Large Pot, combine potatoes and just enough water to cover, heat to boiling.
Boil until potatoes are tender, about 20 minutes, then drain.
Add 2 Tbs Butter and Milk, and mash.
Season with 1/2 Tsp Salt, 1/2 Tsp Pepper, and a little bit of Parmesan.
Meanwhile, in large skillet, melt 1 Tbs Butter over medium heat, add onion and carrots and cook until tender, about 5 minutes.
Add Ground Beef, turn up heat to medium high, break up and cook until beef is browned, skim off excess fat.
Add Tomato Paste and stir together, cook for about a minute.
Add Flour and stir together, cook for about a minute.
Add wine and cook until wine has evaporated.
Add chicken broth, thyme, 1/2 Tsp Salt, 1/2 Pepper, and and stir together, loosening browned bits from the bottom of the skillet.
Heat to boiling then stir in the peas.
Transfer beef mixture to 9" pie pan, then spoon mashed potatoes over top (do not mix).
Spread mashed potatoes over whole pan to form a crust, and sprinkle with Parmesan.
Place pan on foil-lined cookie sheet and bake for about 20 minutes, until potatoes begin to brown and have little delicious crispy edges.
Masticate in front of everybody.
Split Pea and Ham Chowder
Ingredients:
1 Medium Russet Potato, peeled and cut into 1/2 Cubes
3 cups cooked, cubed ham
1 16oz bag split peas
1 11oz can whole kernal corn (with peppers if you can find it)
1 14oz can chicken broth
2 carrots, peeled and sliced
2 ribs of celery, sliced
1 Tbs Dried Onion Flakes
1 Tsp Dried Marjoram
1 Tsp Seasoning Salt
1 Tsp Salt
3 Cups of Water
Directions:
Add all ingredients to slow cooker, cover and cook on low for 6-8 hours.
Inhale, slurping loudly.
Pot Roast
Ingredients:
1 2-3 Lb Boneless Rump Roast
5 medium potatoes, peeled and quartered
1 lb carrots, peeled and sliced
2 medium onions, quartered
1 10oz can Golden Mushroom Soup
1/2 Tsp Dried Basil
1/2 Tsp Seasoning Salt
Directions:
Place potatoes, carrots, and onions into slow cooker.
In large skillet, brown roast on all sides, then place on top of vegetables in slow cooker.
In small bowl, combine golden mushroom soup, basil, and seasoning salt and pour whole mixture over roast and vegetables.
Cover and cook on low for 9-11 hours.
Gormandize.
Potato Crispies
Ingredients:
4 Russet Potatoes
Vegetable Oil
Dried Dill
Garlic Salt
Garlic Powder
Black Pepper
Dried Basil
Directions:
Peel and cut potatoes into 1/2" cubes
Coat the bottom of a cooking pan in vegetable oil and heat.
Add cubed potatoes, toss to coat in oil, and cook until golden brown and crispy.
As potatoes are just beginning to get crispy, add seasonings to taste.
Consume ravenously.
Tomato Basil Soup
Ingredients:
2 28oz cans Crushed Tomatoes
1 15oz can Chicken Broth
Small handful fresh basil leaves (a dozen or so), minced
1 Tbs Sugar
1 Cup Heavy Cream
1/2 Cup of Unsalted Butter
Directions:
In large pot, bring tomatoes and chicken broth to a boil.
Reduce heat, cover, and simmer for 10-15 minutes.
Add basil, sugar, cream, and butter, reduce heat to low, and cook until butter is melted.
Swill heartily.
Triple Chocolate Fuck You In The Mouth Truffle Cake
Ingredients:
3 Cups Semi-Sweet Chocolate Chips
3/4 Cup Milk Chocolate Chips
1 Cup Unsalted Butter (at room temperature)
8 Large Eggs
1/4 Tsp Salt
1/3 Cup Heavy Cream
1 White Chocolate Baking Bar (for garnish)
Directions:
Preheat oven to 325
Bring a large pot of water to a simmer, and put semi-sweet chips and butter into a 2nd smaller pot, resting that pot over the simmering water.
(Or use a double boiler if you're a fancy pants)
Melt chocolate and butter slowly until smooth and creamy.
Meanwhile, quickly whisk together eggs and salt until light and frothy, about 5 minutes
Gently and slowly fold the egg mixture into the chocolate mixture, a little at a time, mix slowly until smooth
Coat the bottom and sides of a 9" pie pan with butter, then line only the bottom with wax paper.
Pour the mixture into the pie pan, and place the pie pan into a larger pan filled half way up with warm water. Do not allow the water to get into the pie pan.
Bake the whole thing for 40 minutes, then move the whole pie pan to a cooling rack (keep the chocolate in the pie pan).
One pie pan has completely cooled, cover with plastic wrap and refrigerate for at least 8 hours.
To remove the cake from the pie pan, dip the pan in warm water and run a thin knife around the outside edge, carefully invert onto a plate, and remote the pie pan.
Don't forget to remove the wax paper!
Prepare the glaze by bringing the heavy cream to a boil over low heat, then slowly mix in the milk chocolate chips, stir until smooth.
Cool the glaze until it is warm to the touch, then pour it over the top of the cake. Watch for overflow.
Refrigerate the cake for about 30 minutes, then grate white chocolate bar on top of cake for garnish.
Devour as if your life depended on it.
Moroccan Tagine
Ingredients:
Olive Oil
2 Skinless, Boneless Chicken Breasts, cut into chunks
1/2 Onion, Chopped
3-5 Cloves Garlic, minced (to taste)
1 Small Butternut Squash, peeled and chopped into 1/2 cubes
1 15.5 oz can Garbanzo Beans, rinsed and drained.
1 Large Carrot, peeled and chopped
1 14.5 oz can Diced Tomatoes
1 14oz can Vegetable Broth
1 Tbs Sugar
1 Tbs Lemon Juice
1 Tsp Salt
1 Tsp Ground Coriander
1/2 Tsp Cayenne Pepper
Directions:
Heat the olive oil in a big ass pan, cook chicken, onion, and garlic until browned, about 15 minutes.
Add everything else, then bring to a boil for about 30 minutes, until vegetables are tender.
Gobble unabashedly.
Fuck Me Now Garlic Rosemary Pizza
Ingredients:
1 Lb Frozen White Bread Dough, thawed
3 Tbs Olive Oil
4-8 Cloves Garlic, minced (to taste)
1/2 Tsp Dried Rosemary
2 Cups Shredded Mozzerella Cheese
Whatever other delicious pizza toppings you can imagine.
Directions:
Preheat oven to 375
Roll out dough onto lightly floured surface, then transfer to greased baking sheet.
Let stand for about half an hour in a warm place to rise slightly.
In small bowl, combine oil, garlic, and rosemary.
Press a bunch of indentations into the bread using two fingers, then brush oil mixture very liberally over dough.
Bake 18-20 minutes until golden brown, then remove from oven
Coat pizza with cheese and toppings, then bake for another 3-5 minutes until cheese is melted.
Caress it lustfully with your stomach.
Maple Dill Carrots
Ingredients:
3 Cups Peeled, Sliced Carrots
2 Tbs Butter
3 Tbs Brown Sugar
Dried Dill
1/2 Tsp Salt
1/2 Tsp Black Pepper
Directions:
Simmer carrots in water until tender.
Drain water and add butter, brown sugar, salt, and pepper.
Season with Dill to taste.
Stuff thy face.
Bacon Cheeseburger Chicken
Ingredients:
2 Tablespoons Vegetable Oil
2 Boneless, Skinless Chicken Breasts
Teriyaki Sauce
Bacon Ranch Dressing
1 Cup Shredded Cheddar Cheese
2 Green Onions, Chopped
Bacon Bits (the real kind, not those artificial crap nuggets you cheap bastard)
Directions:
Preheat Oven to 350
In large skilled over medium high heat, heat oil and saute chicken about 5 minutes on each side until lightly browned.
Place chicken breasts in a small baking dish lined with tin foil.
Brush liberally with teriyaki sauce, then drizzle liberally with ranch dressing.
Sprinkle with cheese, green onion, and bacon bits.
Bake for 30-35 minutes, until chicken is no longer pink.
Wolf it down to China Town.
Homemade Applesauce
Ingredients:
4 Large Golden Delicious Apples, peeled, cored, and sliced into 8ths
1/2 Cup Apple Cider
1/4 Cup Sugar
1 Tsp Lemon Juice
Directions:
Combine all ingredients in medium pot at heat to boiling over high heat.
Reduce heat to low, then simmer until apples are very tender, about 20-25 minutes.
Remove from stove, and mash to a pulp.
Partake of the Essence.
Cottage Pie
Ingredients:
2 Lbs (about 6) russet potatoes, peeled and cut into quarters.
1/2 Cup Milk
3 Tbs Unsalted Butter
Parmesan Cheese
Salt
Ground Black Pepper
1 Medium Onion, chopped
2 Carrots, peeled and chopped
1 Lb Ground Beef
2 Tbs Tomato Paste
2 Tbs Flour
1/4 Cup Dry Red Wine
1 Cup Chicken Broth
1/4 Tsp Dried Thyme
1 Cup Frozen Peas
Directions:
Preheat oven to 425.
In Large Pot, combine potatoes and just enough water to cover, heat to boiling.
Boil until potatoes are tender, about 20 minutes, then drain.
Add 2 Tbs Butter and Milk, and mash.
Season with 1/2 Tsp Salt, 1/2 Tsp Pepper, and a little bit of Parmesan.
Meanwhile, in large skillet, melt 1 Tbs Butter over medium heat, add onion and carrots and cook until tender, about 5 minutes.
Add Ground Beef, turn up heat to medium high, break up and cook until beef is browned, skim off excess fat.
Add Tomato Paste and stir together, cook for about a minute.
Add Flour and stir together, cook for about a minute.
Add wine and cook until wine has evaporated.
Add chicken broth, thyme, 1/2 Tsp Salt, 1/2 Pepper, and and stir together, loosening browned bits from the bottom of the skillet.
Heat to boiling then stir in the peas.
Transfer beef mixture to 9" pie pan, then spoon mashed potatoes over top (do not mix).
Spread mashed potatoes over whole pan to form a crust, and sprinkle with Parmesan.
Place pan on foil-lined cookie sheet and bake for about 20 minutes, until potatoes begin to brown and have little delicious crispy edges.
Masticate in front of everybody.
Split Pea and Ham Chowder
Ingredients:
1 Medium Russet Potato, peeled and cut into 1/2 Cubes
3 cups cooked, cubed ham
1 16oz bag split peas
1 11oz can whole kernal corn (with peppers if you can find it)
1 14oz can chicken broth
2 carrots, peeled and sliced
2 ribs of celery, sliced
1 Tbs Dried Onion Flakes
1 Tsp Dried Marjoram
1 Tsp Seasoning Salt
1 Tsp Salt
3 Cups of Water
Directions:
Add all ingredients to slow cooker, cover and cook on low for 6-8 hours.
Inhale, slurping loudly.
Pot Roast
Ingredients:
1 2-3 Lb Boneless Rump Roast
5 medium potatoes, peeled and quartered
1 lb carrots, peeled and sliced
2 medium onions, quartered
1 10oz can Golden Mushroom Soup
1/2 Tsp Dried Basil
1/2 Tsp Seasoning Salt
Directions:
Place potatoes, carrots, and onions into slow cooker.
In large skillet, brown roast on all sides, then place on top of vegetables in slow cooker.
In small bowl, combine golden mushroom soup, basil, and seasoning salt and pour whole mixture over roast and vegetables.
Cover and cook on low for 9-11 hours.
Gormandize.