Fun with surveys!
Here's a sweet survey. I snagged it from primeai.
Imagine this scenario... you're given a revolver with six bullets, and dropped off in a magical, theoretical land where all movie, television and music stars live together. Writers too, what the hell? Assuming you're a good shot, which six celebrities would you murder for the grief they've caused you by their very existence? Dead celebrities are fair game as well, if you really hate John Wayne that much, feel free to ressurect him only to kill him all over again. Also, P. Diddy is a freebie, don't bother adding him.
1) FREAKING MEG RYAN. I guess one right between the eyes. I can't chance that the bitch will pull through...
2) Number two would be... Britney Spears.
3) Number three? Britney Spears! So it's a double-tap to the head. Oops, I did it again! EAT IT!
4) Hmmm. Oooh! Gavin Rosdale. Move in on my woman, and you gotsta go. I love you Gwen!!
5) Osama. Because maybe some people would love me so much, they would pay me.
6) Hmmm... I think that's everyone... wait... who's that? It's Avril Lasagna, Christina Ag... ulera... and BRITNEY SPEARS?? AGAIN?!? *loads the AWP, lines up the shot, and takes out all three with the last bullet* (So I cheated. Can you blame me? If you can, you're definitely a Sk8r Boi.)
Okay, same scenario as before, except this time you're given six condoms (because we're all about safe sex in this day and age) and six six-packs of the beer of your choice. Which six celebrities do you seek out and have hot, sweaty, drunk, monkey-sex with?
1) Gwen Stefani.
2) Gwen Stefani.
3) Gwen Stefani.
4) Gwen Stefani.
5) Gwen Stefani.
6) Gwen Stefani. (What can I say? I'm a one-woman man!)
Uh-oh! Your three-hour tour has gone awry, and you're shipwrecked on an uncharted desert isle! Fortunately, your six favourite people are with you. Who's on your island, and which of your crew most resembles which member of the Gilligan's Island castaway crew?
(I decided to modify this. It's the star wars crew. Because I don't know anyone, myself included, who would not be completely offended to be compared to ANY of the characters on the island.)
1) Greedo is Ginger. He's not real, but he's a Rodian. Mad props.
2) Leia is Mary-anne.
3) Chewie is the Skipper.
4) R2D2 is the Professor
5) C3P0 is Gilligan
6) Obi-Wan is Mr. Howell
7) Luke is Mrs. Howell. He bitches too much.
And Vader can be the shark. That bites off Mrs. Howell's hand.
Alas! Your brilliant and inspiring life has come to an abrupt end, possibly resulting from your attempt to gun down P. Diddy while he was packin' heat. But fortunately, here you have listed the six songs that you want your musically talented, yet grieving, surviving loved ones to sing for you at your funeral.
1) "Pass Me By" (ICP)
2) "Kryptonite" (ThreeDoorsDown)
3) "Legacy" (The Gone Jackals - Some of you would know it as the opening theme to "Full Throttle". You know. The awesome game by Lucas Arts.)
4) The opening theme to Hackers. I think it's by Orbital. Anyway. I'd make everyone sit through that 9+ minute long song. Damn straight.
5) "Dare to be Stupid" (Weird Al)
6) "Don't Speak" (No Doubt - I love you Gwen! Such a hottie!)
Did you know that before Moby will play any concerts at any venue, he demands to be supplied with no less than ten pairs of white cotton boxer shorts (what he does with ten pairs is anyone's guess, perhaps that vegan diet of his is bad on the intestines)? And that Trent Reznor demands two boxes of cornstarch, along with a full assortment of fruits and vegetables for his juicer? Or that Christina Aguilera can't perform without a box of Flintstone's Chewable Vitamins with Extra C? What would YOUR six top Backstage Diva Demands be?
1) The severed head of Britney Spears on a pike.
2) An Xbox with KotOR.
3) A bunch of smoothies.
4) Gwen Stefani to sing backup.
5) Buffalo chicken.
6) Soda.
And since it's never good to end things on a positive note, consider this... You know when you just hate something so much it makes you want to shit? List six non-food items or concepts that tend to give you the runs.
1) Britney Spears.
2) Boy Bands.
3) Stupid people.
4) Winnie the Pooh.
5) Britney Spears.
6) That I do not yet have my first billion dollars. I'm, in fact, far short of that amount. By about $999,999,999.
Imagine this scenario... you're given a revolver with six bullets, and dropped off in a magical, theoretical land where all movie, television and music stars live together. Writers too, what the hell? Assuming you're a good shot, which six celebrities would you murder for the grief they've caused you by their very existence? Dead celebrities are fair game as well, if you really hate John Wayne that much, feel free to ressurect him only to kill him all over again. Also, P. Diddy is a freebie, don't bother adding him.
1) FREAKING MEG RYAN. I guess one right between the eyes. I can't chance that the bitch will pull through...
2) Number two would be... Britney Spears.
3) Number three? Britney Spears! So it's a double-tap to the head. Oops, I did it again! EAT IT!
4) Hmmm. Oooh! Gavin Rosdale. Move in on my woman, and you gotsta go. I love you Gwen!!
5) Osama. Because maybe some people would love me so much, they would pay me.
6) Hmmm... I think that's everyone... wait... who's that? It's Avril Lasagna, Christina Ag... ulera... and BRITNEY SPEARS?? AGAIN?!? *loads the AWP, lines up the shot, and takes out all three with the last bullet* (So I cheated. Can you blame me? If you can, you're definitely a Sk8r Boi.)
Okay, same scenario as before, except this time you're given six condoms (because we're all about safe sex in this day and age) and six six-packs of the beer of your choice. Which six celebrities do you seek out and have hot, sweaty, drunk, monkey-sex with?
1) Gwen Stefani.
2) Gwen Stefani.
3) Gwen Stefani.
4) Gwen Stefani.
5) Gwen Stefani.
6) Gwen Stefani. (What can I say? I'm a one-woman man!)
Uh-oh! Your three-hour tour has gone awry, and you're shipwrecked on an uncharted desert isle! Fortunately, your six favourite people are with you. Who's on your island, and which of your crew most resembles which member of the Gilligan's Island castaway crew?
(I decided to modify this. It's the star wars crew. Because I don't know anyone, myself included, who would not be completely offended to be compared to ANY of the characters on the island.)
1) Greedo is Ginger. He's not real, but he's a Rodian. Mad props.
2) Leia is Mary-anne.
3) Chewie is the Skipper.
4) R2D2 is the Professor
5) C3P0 is Gilligan
6) Obi-Wan is Mr. Howell
7) Luke is Mrs. Howell. He bitches too much.
And Vader can be the shark. That bites off Mrs. Howell's hand.
Alas! Your brilliant and inspiring life has come to an abrupt end, possibly resulting from your attempt to gun down P. Diddy while he was packin' heat. But fortunately, here you have listed the six songs that you want your musically talented, yet grieving, surviving loved ones to sing for you at your funeral.
1) "Pass Me By" (ICP)
2) "Kryptonite" (ThreeDoorsDown)
3) "Legacy" (The Gone Jackals - Some of you would know it as the opening theme to "Full Throttle". You know. The awesome game by Lucas Arts.)
4) The opening theme to Hackers. I think it's by Orbital. Anyway. I'd make everyone sit through that 9+ minute long song. Damn straight.
5) "Dare to be Stupid" (Weird Al)
6) "Don't Speak" (No Doubt - I love you Gwen! Such a hottie!)
Did you know that before Moby will play any concerts at any venue, he demands to be supplied with no less than ten pairs of white cotton boxer shorts (what he does with ten pairs is anyone's guess, perhaps that vegan diet of his is bad on the intestines)? And that Trent Reznor demands two boxes of cornstarch, along with a full assortment of fruits and vegetables for his juicer? Or that Christina Aguilera can't perform without a box of Flintstone's Chewable Vitamins with Extra C? What would YOUR six top Backstage Diva Demands be?
1) The severed head of Britney Spears on a pike.
2) An Xbox with KotOR.
3) A bunch of smoothies.
4) Gwen Stefani to sing backup.
5) Buffalo chicken.
6) Soda.
And since it's never good to end things on a positive note, consider this... You know when you just hate something so much it makes you want to shit? List six non-food items or concepts that tend to give you the runs.
1) Britney Spears.
2) Boy Bands.
3) Stupid people.
4) Winnie the Pooh.
5) Britney Spears.
6) That I do not yet have my first billion dollars. I'm, in fact, far short of that amount. By about $999,999,999.