(no subject)
im wearing his socks :) i had a major freak out yesterday. it sucked. he was perfect. how come no matter how hard i push, he still is perfect? i really do test him. do you love me enough to stay, even if i do this? what about this? and this and this? its comforting, but at the same time, it scares me.
im thinking about what my favorite book is. because you know you have a stock answer to this one. but...i just dont know. the phantom tollbooth is one. others...? im at a loss. i have always loved the jungle just because it was so brutally honest, and showed the disgusting side of humanity. i read that when i was far too young, and it scared me. but enraptured me. same deal with a brave new world. too much sex for middle school. but that wasnt/isnt one of my top whatever favorites. lets see.
im boring myself with this train of thought. i imed danny. yeah. it almost seems sneaky of me. deceptive, underhanded. you forget about how a person really is. because he existed in my mind for so so long. its so surprising and refreshing to find, again, that i really do like his personality and talking to him. and i texted jason a bit, a lot a bit, yesterday, and that was good too. and i miss them both. separately, and together.
my visa paperwork made it all in. fedex was freaking me out for a while. but we got it all figured out. fucking fuck did it suck.
tomorrow all the relatives are coming over. i expect it will be good. the twins were born on the 16th. hayden madison coulter and grace reagan coulter. what else could you expect from a girl named lyndon (yeah as in b. johnson). i would hate to live in texas.
i feel like all of life up until now was a rush to get to the good stuff. and now im here and i want everything to lasttt. each day goes too quickly. i know there will be new and different things every day and i just want to drag my feet... :)
forse io ho un idea che e molto stupido, ma io credo che e possible. desidero che io andare alla italia con jasone e elisabetta ma alla stessa tempo, io desidero che rimanere negli stati uniti. io ho bisogno di lui e io non lo so...im forgetting how to speak italian :(
goodnight dish, goodnight spoon, goodnight cow jumping over the moon