(no subject)
I was very drunk Friday/Saturday night so I will just list things that happened, because Im not quite sure when they happened.
1. Jarman got his dick sucked by a slutty slut, he exploded in her mouth and she in turn puke all over him. Jarman told the dumb whore to leave, and went to take a shower. Dumb whore doesn’t leave but merely walks downstairs where she proceeds to make out with Toomer. They did this for 10 minutes or so. Now we call him Ralph and always say- BLAH when he walks by... We are terrible people.
2. I yelled at some cops. The particulars are not overly necessary, just realize I was carrying two handles at the time stumbling and I proceeded to curse out people with badges because I could. Steve you need to talk to your boys about harassing good citizen’s like me... I am white God damn it.
3. Saturday there was a party at the old party house and there were a few fatties there. My boy, Fake, decided to get a pool going and the person who fucked the fattest girl won the prize. By nights end there was 300 dollars and 2 handles of Black Label Beam on the line. Fake won/lost, as he fucked the fattest girl I have ever seen. She was 5'2 at most and at least 250 pounds, she was wearing a skirt and a small shirt... and that image will forever haunt me.
4. Both nights I decided it was a good idea to throw beer on people, seeing how it was at or below 35 degrees Fahrenheit (1.7 degrees Celsius for the Canucks) both nights. It was fun. I would say- “Surf’s up” and dump a portion of the contents of my cup on them. For some reason girls got a little angry at that on occasion, maybe I should have taken the time to get to know them before I dumped beer on them.
5. I could have gotten so much ass both nights. I am a flirting kinda guy, and I also like to do it to know that I could still bag chicks... Yeah, girl’s are still dumb sluts and I could have had them lick my toes after I told them I did not want to actually fuck them. Dumb girls.
6. I fell down at some point and really fucked up my knee... It has been hurting more and more especially now that it is getting colder. Damn you old football injury rehashed!
7. Still have the parasite thing and I gotta tell you, if you ever want to lose weight get one of these guys. I mean I poop a lot, but between all the pooping and puking I am gonna be Kate Moss size soon.
8. I don’t have anything else I can remember. Damn spotty memory, I think I am getting Alzheimer’s... or I drink too much, one or the other.
1. Jarman got his dick sucked by a slutty slut, he exploded in her mouth and she in turn puke all over him. Jarman told the dumb whore to leave, and went to take a shower. Dumb whore doesn’t leave but merely walks downstairs where she proceeds to make out with Toomer. They did this for 10 minutes or so. Now we call him Ralph and always say- BLAH when he walks by... We are terrible people.
2. I yelled at some cops. The particulars are not overly necessary, just realize I was carrying two handles at the time stumbling and I proceeded to curse out people with badges because I could. Steve you need to talk to your boys about harassing good citizen’s like me... I am white God damn it.
3. Saturday there was a party at the old party house and there were a few fatties there. My boy, Fake, decided to get a pool going and the person who fucked the fattest girl won the prize. By nights end there was 300 dollars and 2 handles of Black Label Beam on the line. Fake won/lost, as he fucked the fattest girl I have ever seen. She was 5'2 at most and at least 250 pounds, she was wearing a skirt and a small shirt... and that image will forever haunt me.
4. Both nights I decided it was a good idea to throw beer on people, seeing how it was at or below 35 degrees Fahrenheit (1.7 degrees Celsius for the Canucks) both nights. It was fun. I would say- “Surf’s up” and dump a portion of the contents of my cup on them. For some reason girls got a little angry at that on occasion, maybe I should have taken the time to get to know them before I dumped beer on them.
5. I could have gotten so much ass both nights. I am a flirting kinda guy, and I also like to do it to know that I could still bag chicks... Yeah, girl’s are still dumb sluts and I could have had them lick my toes after I told them I did not want to actually fuck them. Dumb girls.
6. I fell down at some point and really fucked up my knee... It has been hurting more and more especially now that it is getting colder. Damn you old football injury rehashed!
7. Still have the parasite thing and I gotta tell you, if you ever want to lose weight get one of these guys. I mean I poop a lot, but between all the pooping and puking I am gonna be Kate Moss size soon.
8. I don’t have anything else I can remember. Damn spotty memory, I think I am getting Alzheimer’s... or I drink too much, one or the other.