So I don't look back...
Title: It hurts with every heartbeat
Author: fridha
Pairing/Character: Logan/Veronica
Word Count: 526
Rating: PG
Spoilers: Up to 3x10.
Summary: Thoughts on the break-up, Logan’s pov. Based on the song 'With every heartbeat' by Robyn.
Warnings: None
Disclaimer: I own nothing, except my own words. No copyright infringement is intended.
Author’s notes: This is my first fic, ever, so be kind with your comments (but not too kind).
“I think we have a choice. And I think we can take a tough but survivable amount of pain now…
or stay together and deal with unbearable pain later.
So, I vote for the pain now. But I’m always here…if you need anything. But you never need anything”
There comes a time in your life when you have to make a choice. A choice that changes everything, not just for you, but also for the people you love the most.
You can say that it’s for the good of everyone, that it will make everything better. But deep down you know that there is a possibility that that’s not true.
This was your choice. To walk away even though it breaks your heart. And in the moment you said it out loud, you could see her heart breaking too.
Are relationships really supposed to be this hard?
but they don’t write songs about the ones that come easy.
What if you made the wrong choice?
What if you could have made it work, and now it’s all gone down the drain because of you?
But you know that things will never change, no matter how hard you try, you will always be you.
her knight in shining armour, her prince-charming, the one person who will never stop trying to save her.
and she… she will always be the person she is now.
She’s filled her mould. You have no doubt in you mind that she is perfect, flawless. Because even her imperfections are perfect to you.
Because they keep her strong and focussed and everything else that you love about her. She will always be her.
your sassy vixen, your bobcat, the one who can’t stop trying to change you.
You’ve made your choice, and you have to live with it. Because it defines you and it defines her. You can’t keep trying to go back and change everything for the better,
because things will never change.
so you don’t look back, still you’re dying with every step you take.
The problem with letting her go is that you know that for each time you go back and try, just once, just a little, it gets better. Before it gets worse again.
You know that it’s worth it.
It’s good enough to waste some time.
Her love is worth wasting all your time.
But your heart… you’re not sure your heart can take the pain that the good times, sooner or later, always bring. So you refuse to look back.
It breaks you. It will leave your soul and your heart imperfect for the rest of your life. But you don’t look back.
And it… it hurts with every heartbeat.
A broken limb hurts when you use it before it’s healed. And so it will be, probably forever,
because you’ve chosen to lose the one thing that kept you sane. The one thing that made you whole, that kept your feet on the ground.
The thing that fulfilled all the other clichés that Hollywood has made a mockery of.
You’ve felt it, you know it’s real.
And it hurts with every heartbeat.