Lists
I’m only a few pages into Bird by Bird and it’s already convinced me to write something. It talks about the need to “put something on paper every day,” and I need to get back into that habit. Also, the more I think about it, I really do want to be published. I want to be in Harper’s. I want to be a writer, part-time. Thanks for the kick in the ass, Bruce.
Maybe one of the most important lessons I’ve learned this year is to stop forgetting the lessons I’ve already learned. Build, move forward. I need to re-read this journal and take notes on the different conclusions I’ve come to.
10/12 : I really do need structure and priorities. Getting these will be another nail in the coffin for my ADD.
10/13: I want my future house to look like the old man’s house in A Clockwork Orange. Cozy retro-future.
10/17 : Don’t hang around when you know it’s over. Leave before bittersweet turns to bitter.
10/26 : I need a system of personal beliefs. I need to put my abstract feelings into language.
10/26 : Nearly everything in life follows some sort of pattern. I didn’t have enough respect for math and science growing up.
10/26 : Don’t run away from death. Don’t be afraid of looking death in the face. It’s an inevitable part of life and nature, and it only makes you feel more alive.
10/26 : The more you study your medium (writing, music, etc), the greater level of control you have over it.
10/26 : I should read Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, possibly in conjunction with my old Drugs and Behavior texbook.
10/26 : When you know an incredible situation is playing out right in front of you (3 blondes in the elevator), you have no choice but to act. Take the risk.
10/26 : I need to become the most outgoing person I know.
10/26 : I need to hang out on Walnut St. more.
10/26 : In fun social situations that require any sort of risk, don’t think. Ever. Just act.
10/31 : Work on hanging out with Josh more and relating to him.
10/31 : I really need to visit my Grandma more. I’ll regret it later if I don’t.
10/31 : We should ban calculators until pretty late in the game, like 9th or 10th grade. I’ve realized that I learned nothing in most of my math and physics classes because I just plugged numbers into a formula that I didn’t understand, then fed that formula to a computer and wrote down the answer. You never actually learn what you’re doing when you rely on a calculator, at least when you rely on the kind we used.
So I got to thinking… was it just in math and science that I didn’t learn anything? No, it was German, too. And I was interested in German, so that excuse goes out the wndow. I learned more German in one semester of college than I did in 3 years of high school. All we did in high school was memorize vocab lists and bake cakes and never really took the time to learn, you know, how to speak German.
My education at Upper St. Clair sucked because schools like Upper St. Clair aren’t actually interested in educating children. They’re interested in looking good and winning government awards and receiving money from those awards. They’re interested in standardized test scores. We never learned math or science or German because we were too busy doing more exciting things, like blowing stuff up or going on field trips and other bullshit that looked good to the parents. When it came time to take tests, we just spouted off the facts we memorized and plugged numbers into the cheat sheets we made on our $150 calculators. We learned nothing, and as long as we went to a name-brand college, nobody cared.
11/02 : My people are the nerds. These are the people I should be spending time with. As you get older, the cool kids get boring and the nerds get better looking. The nerds win in the end.
11/09 : Maintain an inner monologue as often as I can. It forces you to be responsible for your own thoughts by putting them into language. It makes you realize how illogical you’re being and allows you to make better decisions.
11/09 : Think like a writer.
11/09 : Stop catastrophising. Everything is not the end of the world. People call off work, turn things in late and forget to call back all the time. Everybody does it and everybody forgives and forgets. Life goes on.
11/09 : My name is Jonathan.
11/22 : Horns sound evil in classical music. No one uses them like that in rock. I should try.
12/02 : Plan to rest sometimes. Normal weekends only wear you out more.
12/13 : Music can be an opiate for me. Stay away from it when trying to get work done.
12/24 : What comes from the soul goes to the soul.
Maybe one of the most important lessons I’ve learned this year is to stop forgetting the lessons I’ve already learned. Build, move forward. I need to re-read this journal and take notes on the different conclusions I’ve come to.
10/12 : I really do need structure and priorities. Getting these will be another nail in the coffin for my ADD.
10/13: I want my future house to look like the old man’s house in A Clockwork Orange. Cozy retro-future.
10/17 : Don’t hang around when you know it’s over. Leave before bittersweet turns to bitter.
10/26 : I need a system of personal beliefs. I need to put my abstract feelings into language.
10/26 : Nearly everything in life follows some sort of pattern. I didn’t have enough respect for math and science growing up.
10/26 : Don’t run away from death. Don’t be afraid of looking death in the face. It’s an inevitable part of life and nature, and it only makes you feel more alive.
10/26 : The more you study your medium (writing, music, etc), the greater level of control you have over it.
10/26 : I should read Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, possibly in conjunction with my old Drugs and Behavior texbook.
10/26 : When you know an incredible situation is playing out right in front of you (3 blondes in the elevator), you have no choice but to act. Take the risk.
10/26 : I need to become the most outgoing person I know.
10/26 : I need to hang out on Walnut St. more.
10/26 : In fun social situations that require any sort of risk, don’t think. Ever. Just act.
10/31 : Work on hanging out with Josh more and relating to him.
10/31 : I really need to visit my Grandma more. I’ll regret it later if I don’t.
10/31 : We should ban calculators until pretty late in the game, like 9th or 10th grade. I’ve realized that I learned nothing in most of my math and physics classes because I just plugged numbers into a formula that I didn’t understand, then fed that formula to a computer and wrote down the answer. You never actually learn what you’re doing when you rely on a calculator, at least when you rely on the kind we used.
So I got to thinking… was it just in math and science that I didn’t learn anything? No, it was German, too. And I was interested in German, so that excuse goes out the wndow. I learned more German in one semester of college than I did in 3 years of high school. All we did in high school was memorize vocab lists and bake cakes and never really took the time to learn, you know, how to speak German.
My education at Upper St. Clair sucked because schools like Upper St. Clair aren’t actually interested in educating children. They’re interested in looking good and winning government awards and receiving money from those awards. They’re interested in standardized test scores. We never learned math or science or German because we were too busy doing more exciting things, like blowing stuff up or going on field trips and other bullshit that looked good to the parents. When it came time to take tests, we just spouted off the facts we memorized and plugged numbers into the cheat sheets we made on our $150 calculators. We learned nothing, and as long as we went to a name-brand college, nobody cared.
11/02 : My people are the nerds. These are the people I should be spending time with. As you get older, the cool kids get boring and the nerds get better looking. The nerds win in the end.
11/09 : Maintain an inner monologue as often as I can. It forces you to be responsible for your own thoughts by putting them into language. It makes you realize how illogical you’re being and allows you to make better decisions.
11/09 : Think like a writer.
11/09 : Stop catastrophising. Everything is not the end of the world. People call off work, turn things in late and forget to call back all the time. Everybody does it and everybody forgives and forgets. Life goes on.
11/09 : My name is Jonathan.
11/22 : Horns sound evil in classical music. No one uses them like that in rock. I should try.
12/02 : Plan to rest sometimes. Normal weekends only wear you out more.
12/13 : Music can be an opiate for me. Stay away from it when trying to get work done.
12/24 : What comes from the soul goes to the soul.