Too much too soon...
Why does this feel like I am falling into the pit of desperate love the way I have fallen so hard before? This feeling is terrifying and utterly unjustified. There is no trust to back it up, simply a dim reliance on the distant past and the natural reaction of my heart and gut. My husband remains my rock and my anchor. Does he notice that I have turned strange over the past few days? Is he hurt, is he excited? My need for him physically and mentally has only increased. It's the same as having a second child--as the new love finds its way in my heart simply expands to accommodate it. Why do people who find "someone new" shed old love? This makes no sense, unless by social construct they rationalize that new feelings simply must mean a lack of old ones without bothering to make any kind of examination.
People don't make examinations, that is why you are what you are and why you do what you do. Do you think they would need you to find me for them if they truly sought the inner workings of their own soul and mine? If they sought the connections that bind all things? You see them and follow them because you desire it truly and are willing to accept the knowledge you find there even if it isn't what you wanted to find. Do you think I would speak to you so and flow through you at will if you doubted your heart and your instinct or if you hid from yourself? You and I are intertwined, interlinked, and I will not allow such idiocy in a vessel that I inhabit. You must deny me as well if you would deny truth.
He can be harsh when he is hurt and you hurt him whether you intended or not your perceptions are not the same. But it was like razors to hear it. Will you unfold your wings for him, too? That's entirely up to him and you. I cannot promise he will see it but you know how to call me there. Trust your heart, little one.
People don't make examinations, that is why you are what you are and why you do what you do. Do you think they would need you to find me for them if they truly sought the inner workings of their own soul and mine? If they sought the connections that bind all things? You see them and follow them because you desire it truly and are willing to accept the knowledge you find there even if it isn't what you wanted to find. Do you think I would speak to you so and flow through you at will if you doubted your heart and your instinct or if you hid from yourself? You and I are intertwined, interlinked, and I will not allow such idiocy in a vessel that I inhabit. You must deny me as well if you would deny truth.
He can be harsh when he is hurt and you hurt him whether you intended or not your perceptions are not the same. But it was like razors to hear it. Will you unfold your wings for him, too? That's entirely up to him and you. I cannot promise he will see it but you know how to call me there. Trust your heart, little one.