RANT.

Feb 18, 2007 23:10

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freyjamyass March 2 2007, 03:03:53 UTC
Vomiting from windows? And I applied there? Uh-oh.

And Lady, I've seen your teeth. They're spectacular! Oh gosh, I've also seen some dating swamp creatures--and they make out in public! Inappropriate AND disgusting, which is apparently a winning combination in the dating pool. If that is the alternative to catladydom, then I think being untethered is a comparable alternative.

I don't know if I could marry you... I mean, sheesh, you are just too damn hot for me to handle. You're hot blooded in the true Foreigner sense and I would inevitably be plagued by thoughts of inadequacy and constantly questioning my self-worth much like Rob in High Fidelity and the only way to remedy my insecurities would be to take copious amounts of hormones to induce beard-growth... Oy, imagine how TRULY silly I would look with a beard. It'd probably be all patchy little tufts of blond. Plus, I don't have a penis, and since we are clearly not lesbians, it could get pretty boring.

I guess we'll just have to wait for a couple of non-mouth-breathers to amble past and snare them with our womanly charms (i.e. hitting their kneecaps with bats).

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