I'm watching the OC right now.
Yeah, i know right. But its 4am and i can't sleep. It makes me all nostalgic.
I feel torn between 700 different things right now. I don't know which way to turn, which to follow through on. I don't know where I want to be, who i want to be with, what i want, who i am even any more. There are so many things i feel like i have ignored and pushed away for too long. I'm basically drinking my stresses away. Hello, I am turning into my mother. My life is defined by the choices I make, and i need to start making some. New Years is going to be eventful. Oh boy. Sarcasm does not work on lj.
new pages. new words. new way of writing it.
new places. new people. Stop fighting it.
I hope, no, expect this coming year to be rather.... volatile? no...... i need a word.... Transposing for me. There i like that. I think that word doesn't generally work in that context, but i like the image it brings up. Like transposing music. Changing the key so that another instrument can play the piece. I need to change my life so that i can play it, because i don't know how to maintain what i'm doing and still be happy. Not enough definitives, too much ambiguity. Hah! I should write cheezy inspirational books.
anyway Happy New Year everyone.
I feel torn between 700 different things right now. I don't know which way to turn, which to follow through on. I don't know where I want to be, who i want to be with, what i want, who i am even any more. There are so many things i feel like i have ignored and pushed away for too long. I'm basically drinking my stresses away. Hello, I am turning into my mother. My life is defined by the choices I make, and i need to start making some. New Years is going to be eventful. Oh boy. Sarcasm does not work on lj.
new pages. new words. new way of writing it.
new places. new people. Stop fighting it.
I hope, no, expect this coming year to be rather.... volatile? no...... i need a word.... Transposing for me. There i like that. I think that word doesn't generally work in that context, but i like the image it brings up. Like transposing music. Changing the key so that another instrument can play the piece. I need to change my life so that i can play it, because i don't know how to maintain what i'm doing and still be happy. Not enough definitives, too much ambiguity. Hah! I should write cheezy inspirational books.
anyway Happy New Year everyone.