Collision chapter 9/?
Chapter 9
Luke was laying on his back on the sofa in his hotel room, with his arms around Reid’s waist, hands resting on the waistband of Reid’s jeans. Reid was kissing him passionately and Luke gave back as good as he got. With hot, deep and slow kisses he was exploring Reid’s mouth with a curious tongue, licking and stroking. Luke’s body felt on fire; this was totally different from anything he had experienced in his life. No girl had ever made him feel like this. This felt so good and so right. He let his hands wander around Reid’s back, revelling in the feel of the strong muscles.
Reid’s hands were at the hem of Luke’s shirt and he slowly lifted the fabric to expose Luke’s abdomen, bunching the shirt up under his arms. He broke the kiss and started to explore Luke’s neck thoroughly with his talented mouth and tongue. He licked from Luke’s ear to his Adam’s apple to the pulse point between his neck and shoulder and sucked on it.
Luke was starting to breathe heavily and he could feel himself grow harder by the second. Reid’s fingers travelled from Luke’s shoulders, down his arms, down to Luke’s hands. He laced their fingers together and moved Luke’s arms up over his head and pinned his hands above his head. He whispered “keep ‘m there,”, while withdrawing his fingers from Luke’s grasp and letting them dance down his arms, back to his shoulders and down his chest. Reid stopped to take a look at Luke, his eyes were closed, his mouth was open and he was panting. He looked so damn beautiful. There were pearls of sweat on his forehead that rolled into his hair, making it wet and dark. He still couldn’t believe he was actually here, in Luke Snyder’s hotel room, seriously making out with him.
“God, you’re so sexy.” Reid murmured into Luke’s ear before licking a drop of sweat from the side of his head.
He slowly caressed the well defined pectoral muscles, drew little circles around Luke’s nipples with his fingers and he flicked the little nubs with his thumbs. Luke moaned “Reid” and the sound of his name rolling off Luke’s tongue like that went straight to Reid’s groin and he pushed his hips down onto Luke. They felt each others erections rub together for the first time and Luke let out a choked “Fuck!” at this totally new sensation. At this rate he was going to come in his pants very soon. His thin sleeping pants allowed him to fully feel Reid’s rough jeans and his impressive erection grinding into him. His head was spinning; this was too much too soon. His hands flew up to Reid’s head, his fingers grasped at his curls and he pulled Reid back up to his face.
“Reid. Reid.” He panted out. “Reid!”
Reid slightly winced at the harsh hair pulling. “What? What is it?” He breathed out before diving in to another hot, deep kiss.
Luke broke the kiss, grabbed Reid’s face and looked into his eyes. “Wait a minute, wait.” With his dark, shiny eyes, flushed cheeks and messed up hair, Luke was the hottest thing Reid had ever seen. He reluctantly raised himself off of Luke and let his body fall beside him. Thank God for expensive hotel suites with ridiculously big sofas.
He turned to his side and raised his hand to cup Luke’s cheek, rubbing his thumb over his bottom lip. “Is this the part where you start freaking out?” He asked.
“Yeah, a little bit.” Luke admitted shyly.
“That’s…understandable, I guess.” Reid said thoughtfully. He cupped Luke’s cheek and leaned down to place a soft kiss on Luke’s lips.
“This is all happening so fast.” Luke admitted, looking at Reid through his eyelashes. Reid couldn’t believe how cute he looked. And Reid really didn’t do cute. But there he was. Luke, being cute.
“Which is bad, why?” Reid teased, smiling while trying to kiss Luke again.
But Luke averted his eyes, turned his head and pulled down his shirt; feeling embarrassed all of a sudden. He tried to sit up, but Reid’s arm prevented him from doing so.
Reid sighed, he let go of Luke and pulled himself up into a sitting position.
“Are you mad?” Luke asked in a small voice, as he also got up.
Reid looked at him incredulously.
“What? No, of course I’m not mad. Would I have liked to continue this? Yes, I would have. But hey, even I can see where you’re coming from. We can take this slow…if that is what you want?” The unspoken question in Reid’s voice was evident. Do you want to continue this?
Luke seemed to shrink before Reid’s eyes. He looked away and murmured “I don’t know what I want.”
Reid had no intention of letting Luke off the hook that easily.
“Really Luke? Because one minute ago it seemed pretty obvious what you wanted.” He countered.
Luke remained silent, looking away from Reid.
“Luke, look at me.” He grabbed Luke’s chin and forced him to look at him. “Hey, what’s going on?”
There were tears in Luke’s eyes threatening to escape, making Reid feel all kinds of uncomfortable. “No, no, no, don’t do that. Don’t start with the leaking.”
Luke couldn’t help but smile at Reid’s description of his almost crying.
“You’re weird.” he sniffed.
“I know, but it’s better than being boring.” Reid nodded in acknowledgement, relieved to see a smile on Luke’s face, even if it was a small one.
And while standing up, he continued “Listen Luke, I think we should call it a night. It’s been a long and very stressful day for you with the press conference, the surgery and …”- he hesitated, “tonight. I don’t want to put your health at risk, so I think it’s best that I go now and you can get some well deserved rest. Okay?” He asked Luke, raising his eyebrows to underline the question.
“Yeah, maybe that is best.” Luke felt relief wash over him that Reid didn’t hold a grudge against him. “But I need you to promise me something.”
“What is it?” Reid dreaded the answer.
Luke fidgeted with his shirt, rolling the fabric around his fingers and peeling it off again. “I need you to promise me you won’t tell anyone about this, about tonight, about...me.”
Reid closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose between his thumb and forefinger.
“Actually, I am a very private person. I don’t feel the need to spill my guts to whoever happens to be in range. Besides, I don’t know anyone in this town. So that’s an easy promise to make. What’s more important is the reason why you are asking me this.”
“I just don’t want anyone to know about it, okay? Between Kevin’s condition and the Championships there is enough to worry about. I don’t want to draw attention to myself. Neither the team nor I need that kind of press right now.” Luke stated.
Reid didn’t buy it for a second. Sure, that may be part of the reason, but only a small part. He was certain the main reason was for Luke not wanting anyone to know, was because he was scared of the reactions from his team mates, the press and probably his family. That he wouldn’t be accepted. Reid knew this because at one point in his life, he had the same feeling. But only very briefly, because his mother knew him better than he knew himself. She figured it out long before Reid himself did and let him know he was accepted just as he was. Reid pondered if his life would have been the same if his mother hadn’t been so supportive. He shook his head. He had no right to push Luke into doing anything he obviously was not ready for. Maybe he just needs time.
So he acquiesced and nodded.
“I would like to keep seeing you, though- if that’s okay with you?” Luke asked, tentatively touching Reid’s arm.
“And how are you going to explain that, Luke? I am not your doctor anymore. Why would you come see me?” Reid asked pointedly.
“I had planned on visiting Kevin daily, so maybe I can see you before or after?” Luke asked hopefully. But then he groaned. “Listen to me, planning to sneak around as if we were doing something wrong. I’m sorry, Reid. I don’t know how to deal with this. I do know that I want to get to know you, I just…fuck! I don’t know.” Luke ran a hand through his hair.
“I get it if this… “ Luke gestured toward himself, “mess is too much for you. I really do. I just..”
“Luke, stop. “Reid interrupted him. “Don’t make it so complicated. We only kissed, nothing else happened. So, if you want to see me tomorrow, text me. And I’ll let you know if I’m available.”
Luke smiled. “Okay, I’ll do that.”
Reid stepped closer to Luke and cupped his face in one hand. “Don’t worry so much.” He kissed him firmly on the mouth. “I’ll talk to you tomorrow.” With a soft slap Reid released him and walked towards the door. While he stepped out, he turned around once more and said “Good night, Luke.” And then he was gone.
Luke just stood there in the middle of the room, trying to process what had happened tonight. He pressed his fingers to his lips, still feeling Reid’s kiss. He plopped down on his bed and smiled goofily. I kissed a guy. I.Kissed.A.Guy! And not just any guy. A gorgeous world-renowned neurosurgeon. Oh Jesus!
It felt incredible and terrifying at the same time, - incredible because finally he had followed his feelings and not his mind. He remembered how amazing it felt to be kissed by Reid and the way his hands had felt on Luke’s body. But it was also terrifying, because he had taken a first tentative step on a path he wasn’t sure yet he wanted to follow right now.
Luke shook his head, and pushed these thoughts to the back of his mind, he would think about that later.
For now, he just wanted to re-live the moments he‘d shared with Reid. So he crawled into bed, let the blankets hug his body and let his mind wander back to earlier that night, when he was in Reid’s arms. Little did he know that Reid had similar thoughts on his way back to his hotel.
Reid exited Luke’s hotel and walked the short distance to his own hotel. He didn’t see any of Luke’s team mates at the hotel and for that he was thankful. Not that anyone would know who he was, but you never know.
The air outside was cool and he walked slowly, enjoying the quietness of the night. He felt really good. He kissed and felt up Luke Snyder. Luke Snyder! The object of many of his fantasies, but none of them did the real thing justice. God, Luke was an excellent kisser and even though he had stopped their hotter than hell make-out session, he had unknowingly given Reid enough material to fantasize about him for at least a year.
The only problem was, now that Reid got a taste of the real thing, he didn’t want to go back to fantasies. He wanted to really feel Luke, kiss him, taste him, suck him, lick him, fuck him. He knew it would rock his world if he could. Fuck, he grew hard at the mere thought of it. He carefully adjusted himself in his jeans and walked even slower.
He let his thoughts drift back to their conversation. Being a major soccer fan, he understood Luke’s unwillingness to come out. The fans were ruthless. They would probably tear him apart and make his life a living hell. And as for his team mates, he could only imagine the awkwardness in the locker room. He wasn’t much of an athlete himself, but he had secretly dated closeted jocks back in school, so he knew a little about the atmosphere there. Some of the things he hear back then had shocked him. Hell, it would still shock him if he heard them now. He was no stranger to homophobia, he had his share of bullying, name-calling, had been the subject of jokes, but that was nothing compared to what Luke probably had to go through.
And he would be right there in the middle with Luke. Was he willing to go through that? It would turn his carefully constructed, quiet and private life completely upside down. He shrugged his shoulders, as if he wanted to shake the thoughts out of his head. It was a bit premature to be thinking about that. He didn’t even know for sure whether or not Luke would be ready to live an honest life and if he even wanted Reid to be a part of it.
And if Reid was really honest with himself, he wasn’t sure if he wanted that too.
*
Luke was laying on his back on the sofa in his hotel room, with his arms around Reid’s waist, hands resting on the waistband of Reid’s jeans. Reid was kissing him passionately and Luke gave back as good as he got. With hot, deep and slow kisses he was exploring Reid’s mouth with a curious tongue, licking and stroking. Luke’s body felt on fire; this was totally different from anything he had experienced in his life. No girl had ever made him feel like this. This felt so good and so right. He let his hands wander around Reid’s back, revelling in the feel of the strong muscles.
Reid’s hands were at the hem of Luke’s shirt and he slowly lifted the fabric to expose Luke’s abdomen, bunching the shirt up under his arms. He broke the kiss and started to explore Luke’s neck thoroughly with his talented mouth and tongue. He licked from Luke’s ear to his Adam’s apple to the pulse point between his neck and shoulder and sucked on it.
Luke was starting to breathe heavily and he could feel himself grow harder by the second. Reid’s fingers travelled from Luke’s shoulders, down his arms, down to Luke’s hands. He laced their fingers together and moved Luke’s arms up over his head and pinned his hands above his head. He whispered “keep ‘m there,”, while withdrawing his fingers from Luke’s grasp and letting them dance down his arms, back to his shoulders and down his chest. Reid stopped to take a look at Luke, his eyes were closed, his mouth was open and he was panting. He looked so damn beautiful. There were pearls of sweat on his forehead that rolled into his hair, making it wet and dark. He still couldn’t believe he was actually here, in Luke Snyder’s hotel room, seriously making out with him.
“God, you’re so sexy.” Reid murmured into Luke’s ear before licking a drop of sweat from the side of his head.
He slowly caressed the well defined pectoral muscles, drew little circles around Luke’s nipples with his fingers and he flicked the little nubs with his thumbs. Luke moaned “Reid” and the sound of his name rolling off Luke’s tongue like that went straight to Reid’s groin and he pushed his hips down onto Luke. They felt each others erections rub together for the first time and Luke let out a choked “Fuck!” at this totally new sensation. At this rate he was going to come in his pants very soon. His thin sleeping pants allowed him to fully feel Reid’s rough jeans and his impressive erection grinding into him. His head was spinning; this was too much too soon. His hands flew up to Reid’s head, his fingers grasped at his curls and he pulled Reid back up to his face.
“Reid. Reid.” He panted out. “Reid!”
Reid slightly winced at the harsh hair pulling. “What? What is it?” He breathed out before diving in to another hot, deep kiss.
Luke broke the kiss, grabbed Reid’s face and looked into his eyes. “Wait a minute, wait.” With his dark, shiny eyes, flushed cheeks and messed up hair, Luke was the hottest thing Reid had ever seen. He reluctantly raised himself off of Luke and let his body fall beside him. Thank God for expensive hotel suites with ridiculously big sofas.
He turned to his side and raised his hand to cup Luke’s cheek, rubbing his thumb over his bottom lip. “Is this the part where you start freaking out?” He asked.
“Yeah, a little bit.” Luke admitted shyly.
“That’s…understandable, I guess.” Reid said thoughtfully. He cupped Luke’s cheek and leaned down to place a soft kiss on Luke’s lips.
“This is all happening so fast.” Luke admitted, looking at Reid through his eyelashes. Reid couldn’t believe how cute he looked. And Reid really didn’t do cute. But there he was. Luke, being cute.
“Which is bad, why?” Reid teased, smiling while trying to kiss Luke again.
But Luke averted his eyes, turned his head and pulled down his shirt; feeling embarrassed all of a sudden. He tried to sit up, but Reid’s arm prevented him from doing so.
Reid sighed, he let go of Luke and pulled himself up into a sitting position.
“Are you mad?” Luke asked in a small voice, as he also got up.
Reid looked at him incredulously.
“What? No, of course I’m not mad. Would I have liked to continue this? Yes, I would have. But hey, even I can see where you’re coming from. We can take this slow…if that is what you want?” The unspoken question in Reid’s voice was evident. Do you want to continue this?
Luke seemed to shrink before Reid’s eyes. He looked away and murmured “I don’t know what I want.”
Reid had no intention of letting Luke off the hook that easily.
“Really Luke? Because one minute ago it seemed pretty obvious what you wanted.” He countered.
Luke remained silent, looking away from Reid.
“Luke, look at me.” He grabbed Luke’s chin and forced him to look at him. “Hey, what’s going on?”
There were tears in Luke’s eyes threatening to escape, making Reid feel all kinds of uncomfortable. “No, no, no, don’t do that. Don’t start with the leaking.”
Luke couldn’t help but smile at Reid’s description of his almost crying.
“You’re weird.” he sniffed.
“I know, but it’s better than being boring.” Reid nodded in acknowledgement, relieved to see a smile on Luke’s face, even if it was a small one.
And while standing up, he continued “Listen Luke, I think we should call it a night. It’s been a long and very stressful day for you with the press conference, the surgery and …”- he hesitated, “tonight. I don’t want to put your health at risk, so I think it’s best that I go now and you can get some well deserved rest. Okay?” He asked Luke, raising his eyebrows to underline the question.
“Yeah, maybe that is best.” Luke felt relief wash over him that Reid didn’t hold a grudge against him. “But I need you to promise me something.”
“What is it?” Reid dreaded the answer.
Luke fidgeted with his shirt, rolling the fabric around his fingers and peeling it off again. “I need you to promise me you won’t tell anyone about this, about tonight, about...me.”
Reid closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose between his thumb and forefinger.
“Actually, I am a very private person. I don’t feel the need to spill my guts to whoever happens to be in range. Besides, I don’t know anyone in this town. So that’s an easy promise to make. What’s more important is the reason why you are asking me this.”
“I just don’t want anyone to know about it, okay? Between Kevin’s condition and the Championships there is enough to worry about. I don’t want to draw attention to myself. Neither the team nor I need that kind of press right now.” Luke stated.
Reid didn’t buy it for a second. Sure, that may be part of the reason, but only a small part. He was certain the main reason was for Luke not wanting anyone to know, was because he was scared of the reactions from his team mates, the press and probably his family. That he wouldn’t be accepted. Reid knew this because at one point in his life, he had the same feeling. But only very briefly, because his mother knew him better than he knew himself. She figured it out long before Reid himself did and let him know he was accepted just as he was. Reid pondered if his life would have been the same if his mother hadn’t been so supportive. He shook his head. He had no right to push Luke into doing anything he obviously was not ready for. Maybe he just needs time.
So he acquiesced and nodded.
“I would like to keep seeing you, though- if that’s okay with you?” Luke asked, tentatively touching Reid’s arm.
“And how are you going to explain that, Luke? I am not your doctor anymore. Why would you come see me?” Reid asked pointedly.
“I had planned on visiting Kevin daily, so maybe I can see you before or after?” Luke asked hopefully. But then he groaned. “Listen to me, planning to sneak around as if we were doing something wrong. I’m sorry, Reid. I don’t know how to deal with this. I do know that I want to get to know you, I just…fuck! I don’t know.” Luke ran a hand through his hair.
“I get it if this… “ Luke gestured toward himself, “mess is too much for you. I really do. I just..”
“Luke, stop. “Reid interrupted him. “Don’t make it so complicated. We only kissed, nothing else happened. So, if you want to see me tomorrow, text me. And I’ll let you know if I’m available.”
Luke smiled. “Okay, I’ll do that.”
Reid stepped closer to Luke and cupped his face in one hand. “Don’t worry so much.” He kissed him firmly on the mouth. “I’ll talk to you tomorrow.” With a soft slap Reid released him and walked towards the door. While he stepped out, he turned around once more and said “Good night, Luke.” And then he was gone.
Luke just stood there in the middle of the room, trying to process what had happened tonight. He pressed his fingers to his lips, still feeling Reid’s kiss. He plopped down on his bed and smiled goofily. I kissed a guy. I.Kissed.A.Guy! And not just any guy. A gorgeous world-renowned neurosurgeon. Oh Jesus!
It felt incredible and terrifying at the same time, - incredible because finally he had followed his feelings and not his mind. He remembered how amazing it felt to be kissed by Reid and the way his hands had felt on Luke’s body. But it was also terrifying, because he had taken a first tentative step on a path he wasn’t sure yet he wanted to follow right now.
Luke shook his head, and pushed these thoughts to the back of his mind, he would think about that later.
For now, he just wanted to re-live the moments he‘d shared with Reid. So he crawled into bed, let the blankets hug his body and let his mind wander back to earlier that night, when he was in Reid’s arms. Little did he know that Reid had similar thoughts on his way back to his hotel.
Reid exited Luke’s hotel and walked the short distance to his own hotel. He didn’t see any of Luke’s team mates at the hotel and for that he was thankful. Not that anyone would know who he was, but you never know.
The air outside was cool and he walked slowly, enjoying the quietness of the night. He felt really good. He kissed and felt up Luke Snyder. Luke Snyder! The object of many of his fantasies, but none of them did the real thing justice. God, Luke was an excellent kisser and even though he had stopped their hotter than hell make-out session, he had unknowingly given Reid enough material to fantasize about him for at least a year.
The only problem was, now that Reid got a taste of the real thing, he didn’t want to go back to fantasies. He wanted to really feel Luke, kiss him, taste him, suck him, lick him, fuck him. He knew it would rock his world if he could. Fuck, he grew hard at the mere thought of it. He carefully adjusted himself in his jeans and walked even slower.
He let his thoughts drift back to their conversation. Being a major soccer fan, he understood Luke’s unwillingness to come out. The fans were ruthless. They would probably tear him apart and make his life a living hell. And as for his team mates, he could only imagine the awkwardness in the locker room. He wasn’t much of an athlete himself, but he had secretly dated closeted jocks back in school, so he knew a little about the atmosphere there. Some of the things he hear back then had shocked him. Hell, it would still shock him if he heard them now. He was no stranger to homophobia, he had his share of bullying, name-calling, had been the subject of jokes, but that was nothing compared to what Luke probably had to go through.
And he would be right there in the middle with Luke. Was he willing to go through that? It would turn his carefully constructed, quiet and private life completely upside down. He shrugged his shoulders, as if he wanted to shake the thoughts out of his head. It was a bit premature to be thinking about that. He didn’t even know for sure whether or not Luke would be ready to live an honest life and if he even wanted Reid to be a part of it.
And if Reid was really honest with himself, he wasn’t sure if he wanted that too.
*