It's three a.m., I must be lonely
It is three a.m. and I am lying here awake. I haven't slept at all.
Tomorrow, I go in for bloodwork and ultrasound to determine when I am to give myself the trigger shot to make those eggs pop. It will likely be Wednesday night, which means harvest day will be Thursday.
I only have four or five follicles, which terrifies me. Everything I've (misguidedly--I should know better than to do this to myself) read says fifteen is the "best" number for IVF success. I have a third of that.
What if this doesn't work? I'm not sure I have it in me to do this a third time. The injections and the hormones are bad enough, but... Well, I suppose staying up all night worrying won't do much good either but it isn't like I'm choosing to stay awake.
My shrink advised me to lay low over spring break, tell everyone around me that I planned to relax and rest and be as free of stress as possible. So of course on Sunday night, Fry chewed on a bottle of Effexor and we had to take him to the emergency vet. It was all for naught, of course, as we assumed it likely would be. He likes to chew plastic. He doesn't like to eat things that aren't tasty. After inducing vomiting and observing him all night, they said he was fine and showed no signs of having ingested any drugs. So we pretty much paid people seven hundred dollars to keep our dog awake and uncomfortable all night. Couple that with a bunch of other unexpected stuff and I'm having a hard time managing the "relaxing" part of all this.
I can't sleep and I feel like crying all the time, and I'm so scared this won't work.
Tomorrow, I go in for bloodwork and ultrasound to determine when I am to give myself the trigger shot to make those eggs pop. It will likely be Wednesday night, which means harvest day will be Thursday.
I only have four or five follicles, which terrifies me. Everything I've (misguidedly--I should know better than to do this to myself) read says fifteen is the "best" number for IVF success. I have a third of that.
What if this doesn't work? I'm not sure I have it in me to do this a third time. The injections and the hormones are bad enough, but... Well, I suppose staying up all night worrying won't do much good either but it isn't like I'm choosing to stay awake.
My shrink advised me to lay low over spring break, tell everyone around me that I planned to relax and rest and be as free of stress as possible. So of course on Sunday night, Fry chewed on a bottle of Effexor and we had to take him to the emergency vet. It was all for naught, of course, as we assumed it likely would be. He likes to chew plastic. He doesn't like to eat things that aren't tasty. After inducing vomiting and observing him all night, they said he was fine and showed no signs of having ingested any drugs. So we pretty much paid people seven hundred dollars to keep our dog awake and uncomfortable all night. Couple that with a bunch of other unexpected stuff and I'm having a hard time managing the "relaxing" part of all this.
I can't sleep and I feel like crying all the time, and I'm so scared this won't work.